Love is not a feeling. It's a daily choice, a habit practiced proactively.

What if intimacy isn't built in the big moments, but in the small ones you almost miss? In this episode, we explore the idea of bids for connection, the everyday ways we reach for each other through a question, a touch, a story, or even a glance across the room. We talk about what happens when those bids are noticed and met with kindness, and what slowly unfolds when they are ignored. You'll hear how responsiveness, presence, and emotional generosity shape trust, passion, and long-term happiness more than grand romantic gestures ever could. If you want a stronger, closer relationship, this conversation will help you see the simple choices that build intimacy over time.

• What are some small bids that you make that I may not always notice?

• What is one simple way we could turn toward each other more consistently this week?

• Bids are everyday requests for connection.
  They can be verbal or nonverbal, big or small, serious or playful.
  
  

• Turning toward builds trust and intimacy.
  Consistent responsiveness creates emotional safety and closeness.
  
  

• Ignored bids create distance over time.
  Missed or rejected bids often lead to frustration, criticism, and disconnection.
  
  

• Vulnerability grows through small, repeated moments.
  Clear, honest bids and kind responses strengthen intimacy more than grand gestures.

https://www.eviemagazine.com/post/the-case-for-centering-your-life-around-romantic-love

https://therapygroupdc.com/therapist-dc-blog/bids-for-connection-why-small-gestures-matter-in-relationships/

https://www.gottman.com/blog/want-to-improve-your-relationship-start-paying-more-attention-to-bids/

MFP Guide to Communication https://messyfamilyproject.org/guide/communication/

There is nothing that the power of the resurrection cannot redeem in your life. - Fr. Shawn Monahan

What do we do with the wounds we carry, especially in marriage? In this powerful episode, Fr. Shawn Monahan shares a trauma-informed vision of spirituality that meets us in our real stories. We're all wounded, some more deeply than others, and healing begins with honest self-knowledge, self-acceptance, and inviting Christ into our pain. Fr. Shawn explains how our desires are shaped for good, how sin is seeking that good in the wrong ways, and why shame keeps us stuck. Christianity isn't behavior management. It's transformation through relationship. You'll also hear practical wisdom for forgiveness, vulnerability, and praying with your spouse. If you're longing for renewal and lasting peace, this conversation offers real hope. Check out his free workshop, "The Path to Healing Our Broken Hearts." Link below!

• We need a trauma-informed spirituality.
  Everyone carries wounds. Some are deeper than others. The Church must recognize this reality and respond with compassion, emotional awareness, and an understanding of how early experiences shape us.
  
  

• Healing begins with self-knowledge and self-acceptance.
  By becoming aware of our reactions and emotions, we grow in self-understanding. This allows us to accept ourselves and become a true gift to others.
  
  

• Desire is good, but it can be distorted.
  God gives good spiritual desires, and our human desires are also good. Sin happens when we pursue those good desires in the wrong ways.
  
  

• Shame blocks healing, but Christ redeems wounds.
  Christianity is about transformation through relationship, not behavior management. Nothing is beyond the power of the Resurrection.
  
  

• Forgiveness and vulnerability are essential in relationships.
  Forgiveness is a grace-filled choice, not a feeling. Real healing in marriage requires empathy, honest listening, asking "Will you forgive me?", and the courage to be vulnerable.

• When you think about your own wounds, how do they show up in our marriage?
  Share one area where past hurts or early experiences may affect your reactions, fears, or desires. What helps you feel safe enough to open up about those places?
  
  

• What would forgiveness or vulnerability look like for us right now?
  Is there anything unspoken between us that needs to be brought into the light? How can we listen with empathy, ask "Will you forgive me?", and invite Jesus into that space together?

FREE virtual workshop with Fr. Shawn: ​​https://www.omvusa.org/our-work/virtual-workshops/path-healing-broken-hearts/

You can't have a healthy relationship if you don't develop the skill of communication.

Marriage doesn't drift into great communication. You have to make the time and practice on purpose. In this episode, we share simple, realistic tools to help couples break bad habits and start talking in ways that actually bring them closer. You'll learn how to listen without fixing, reduce daily stress through connection and fun, and build rituals that create space for meaningful conversation. We talk about appreciation, gentle ways to start hard conversations, and why prayer changes everything. These aren't abstract ideas, they're practical habits you can try tonight. If your conversations feel rushed, tense, or nonexistent, this episode will give you hope and a clear path forward. Strong communication is possible, and it's one of the greatest investments you can make in your marriage. This episode accompanies MFP 368 Couple Communication in a Frantic Family!

• Take time to practice active listening daily. Quietly receive your spouse's stress of the day (not in your relationship) without comments, only questions to deepen your understanding.

• Create and practice Rituals of Connection. Rituals have a structure, a beginning and an end. You should have short daily rituals like sitting on the couch, time alone after dinner, or meaningful conversation after bedtime.

• Make sure to include stress-reducing conversations! Not every conversation needs to be intense. Create some boundaries and be sure to include some fun!

• Give each other appreciation. Gratitude is the key to happiness. Make sure your spouse knows how important they are to you.

• Practice the gentle start-up when relationship conversations need to happen. Always keep in mind how to best communicate so your spouse can receive your words.

• Pray together. Never forget that God is committed to your marriage and will give you all you need to succeed in communication!

• When can we have one daily stress-reducing conversation?.

• List 5 things you admire about your partner and share them.

• 10 Communication Exercises

• https://www.gottman.com/blog/10-communication-exercises-for-couples-to-have-better-relationships/

• Guide to Communication: https://messyfamilyproject.org/guide/communication/