Fernanda Shoup, originally from Argentina and turning 40 with two toddlers at home! She married her wife during Covid outside at a barn in Parker but was supposed to be in Argentina! Talk about a different environment. When she connected with her wife, she wasn’t sure she wanted to be a mom but when she realized that she would parent with HER and that was what changed the whole thought about motherhood! When you have a wife, everything changes. Her wife didn’t want to be pregnant and Fernanda said she was 100% on board with carrying a child but unfortunately it took 2 ½ years of all kinds of infertility issues! Her pregnancy was a breeze and it was glorious. In the 3rd trimester her legs went numb and she was in a ton of pain. She tried many different remedies but it was demoralizing because no one would listen to her. After her wife had to FORCE the hospital to listen, they did scans and found a herniated disc and kept her overnight and had to do survey for her disc issue while 36 weeks pregnant. She had immediate pain relief as soon as she woke up from surgery! Her OB wasn’t the best and didn’t listen so they switched offices (always advocate for YOU) and she had a c-section at 39 weeks. Her c-section was quite the experience too! She struggled with so much postpartum depression and the “I’m not worthy” feelings. Her midwife told her “is the fact that your child wasn’t breastfed going to show up on their application for medical school?” Her feelings of inadequacy lasted months! Even her mom said she was a shell of herself. Her sweet life and her decided that they wanted more kiddos and her wife decided she would carry baby number 2. She got pregnant on the FIRST try! So when they came home with a newborn, they were pregnant with their second! Her wife is a firefighter and hated being pregnant and was on bedrest at 20 weeks!

Emily Hill is a hospice chaplain and licensed social worker. She developed a love for hospice when she was 7 years old because of her grandfather. She was so blown away by how hospice people change the world of the family of the person passing on. She earned a Master’s of divinity and connects with death doulas and how to make people comfortable. Regardless where you fall in the spiritual spectrum, death is a kind of rebirth into the next steps. She has two children and grew up as a pastor's kid but in her head she had everything planned out with the “normal” progression of get married, have babies, move on. She has a group of college girlfriends that she can’t do life without! She was the first one of the friends to have a baby and they showed up with a party size pizza because they were 24 and didn’t know any better! They are her people! Her best mama moment came recently when she was asked to chaperone a field trip and when she was worried what her 10 year old would say about her going. But low and beyond, her daughter was excited to have her, it made her heart so happy! Her worst mama moment was when she had a miscarriage. It rocked her world after having a 3, and 5 year old she had a miscarriage and she was devastated. It also could have ended their marriage because of how they experienced this loss. Humans often experience experiences so differently and they can sometimes make or break a marriage. She wishes she would have known that everyday is a fresh start. We build on things day after day but really every single day can be a do-over! Emily says, “give yourself grace!” You are never going to be perfect so give yourself grace!

Deborah Mallow never thought she wanted kids but after spending time with her friends and their kids, she fell in love with the idea of being a mom. She is one of the positive, happiest people you have ever met! In fact, she has written a book called 6 Steps to Fewer Days That Suck. What a great title! She was 38 when she had her son and now he’s in his 20’s, living in Minnesota. She struggled with balancing it all. She was exhausted through motherhood because she was so stressed about making sure everything was “good.” She wishes she would have taken more time to “chill.” She says living in the moment is important. Her husband was her biggest supporter and is still the doting father. He was always a very active dad and he used to have their son strapped to him. He has always LOVED being a dad. Her best mama moment was when her son went to college! As a helicopter mom, she was so proud! She encourages you to understand that if people are not kind to you, it’s not something YOU need to worry about. Disengage from toxic people. Confidence, resilience and positivity are the three life skills you need for this life. Find the things in life that are positive because all things are contagious and if you go down the negative road, that’s what you will attract. You can find her at thedailydecisions.com.