New year, new holes in your walls — consensually, of course. So let’s get to the hardware store and get some big tools! In this practical, cheeky episode, Hide and Seek, explores DIY sex and kink projects, from plumbed shower douches to slings, A-frames, and at-home gloryholes.

Jon and Craig walk through what’s genuinely DIY-friendly versus when it’s smarter (and safer) to call a tradie. Installing a douche? Probably doable if you can manage a shower head and thread tape. Ceiling eye-bolts? Get professional help. We talk tools, materials, weight ratings, ergonomics, and the very real importance of testing setups before you put a person in them.

The episode also digs into safety beyond construction: splinters, chafing, privacy, theft risk, and why comfort matters just as much as creativity. Not every fantasy needs to be built — but if you are building it, do it well.

This is a fun, grounded reminder that kink at home can be inventive, accessible, and deeply satisfying — as long as safety, durability, and consent come first.

Don’t remember How to Build a Sex Room? Listen to our episode, Dungeons and Daddies!

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

Call the handyman! Fisting is one of those practices that carries a lot of myth, bravado, and whispered horror stories — and not nearly enough calm, practical conversation. In this episode of Hide and Seek, Jon, Craig and Joenas are joined by Nik to demystify fisting, ground it in lived experience, and focus squarely on harm reduction, communication, and care.

We start where it matters most: real stories. First fists, first surprises, what people wish they’d known earlier, and the myths that fall apart the moment you talk to people who actually do it well. From there, the conversation turns to training — not as a race or a performance, but as a slow, respectful process that prioritises relaxation, trust, and listening to your body.

The episode breaks down positions, lube choices, gloves, nail care, and practical supports without going explicit, while still being genuinely useful. We talk about why “too much lube” is rarely the problem, how different positions affect comfort and control, and when it’s time to pause, stop, or seek medical care — no drama, no shame.

Finally, we look at fisting in public or party settings, sexual-health considerations (including injury, gloves, and infections), and why aftercare and negotiation matter even more outside the home. The takeaway is simple but important: fisting done well isn’t extreme or reckless — it’s careful, communicative, deeply intimate, and never rushed. Also? Puppy pads.

Explore some of our past episodes on fisting:

Episode 6 – A Kiss With A Fist

Episode 83 – Fist and Shout

Episode 123 – My Left Hand

Episode 150 – Fistory Repeating

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

I saw Daddy kissing Santa! Wait — Santa? Yes, Santa. In this festive and surprisingly thoughtful episode, Hide and Seek unwraps the idea of “Santa fetish” and uses it as a gateway into understanding how kinks form, why some trigger moral panic, and why curiosity beats judgement every time.

Jon, Craig and Joenas break down the difference between kink and fetish, explaining why Santa roleplay is usually seasonal, playful, and layered onto existing interests like daddy dynamics, uniforms, ritual, and power — not an exclusive or year-round fixation. We tackle the discomfort head-on: why some cultural symbols feel “off-limits,” and why adult consensual roleplay gets misinterpreted so quickly.

From there, the episode dives into the psychology: authority, generosity, surveillance, warmth, transgression, and humour. Santa emerges not as a shock value joke, but as a symbolic container — a way people eroticise comfort, dominance, or reclaim holidays that may carry trauma.

The closing message lands gently but firmly: you don’t need a label to enjoy playful roleplay, and no one owes an explanation for consensual adult desire. Sometimes kink is serious. Sometimes it’s silly. Both can be valid — and fun.

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

Can we just beat it, but without a problematic popstar? Beats have long been part of queer sexual culture — often misunderstood, rarely discussed openly, and still deeply relevant. In this episode, Hide and Seek takes a practical, non-judgemental look at beat sex: what defines a beat, why people go, and how to navigate them safely.

With lived experience front and centre, Melbourne bear personality Rob joins the panel and explores the appeal of beats — anonymity, spontaneity, connection — alongside the real risks, including legal issues, safety concerns, and recent violence linked to app-based targeting. We talk about how beats function socially, how people learn their rhythms, and how to read the difference between a quiet space and one that’s “on.”

The episode offers grounded advice on cruising etiquette, consent signals, what to avoid, and when to leave. It also covers harm-reduction strategies, reporting options for homophobic behaviour, and how online spaces intersect with physical ones.

Rather than romanticising or condemning, this episode treats beats as they are: part of queer history and present-day reality, shaped by law, culture, and community norms. The message is clear — pleasure and safety aren’t opposites, and knowledge is a form of protection.

Find out more about beats here, with our friends at downandirty

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

What happens when you move from a sexually conservative culture into one of the world’s most visible kink scenes — and realise you’re suddenly “allowed” to explore? In this deeply thoughtful episode, Hide and Seek welcomes Joenas to talk about kink discovery after migration, with a particular focus on CALD experiences. What is it like to explore, in colour?

The conversation traces how shame-based sex education, silence, and religious taboo shape early understanding of sex — and how overwhelming it can feel to arrive in a place where kink is visible, named, and socially organised. We talk about the “kink big bang”: the flood of gear, language, expectations, and assumptions that can make newcomers feel behind, exposed, or pressured to perform.

Importantly, the episode challenges stereotypes — from assumptions about submissiveness to fetishisation of cultural background — and offers clear guidance for non-CALD kinksters on how to be respectful allies. Slowing down, asking instead of assuming, and separating curiosity from entitlement are recurring themes.

This is also a story of growth: finding safety in gear, learning through observation, revisiting consent, and discovering that uncertainty is allowed. The takeaway is powerful and generous — kink exploration is richer when we make space for cultural difference, patience, and trust. It’s not just about what you do with your body, but what you’re finally free to feel.

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

With modern treatment, PrEP, and U=U, it’s easy to assume HIV is “sorted.” This episode of Hide and Seek explains why that story is incomplete — and why World AIDS Day still matters in 2025.

Jon and Craig step through the history of World AIDS Day, from the height of the epidemic through to today’s elimination targets, honouring the activists, clinicians, and communities who transformed HIV from a death sentence into a manageable condition, and the impact of access schemes for U=U and PrEP. Along the way, we unpack why remembrance isn’t just symbolic — it actively shapes policy, funding, and care.

The discussion tackles ongoing stigma head-on: on dating apps, in clinics, in shared spaces, and in the language people still use (“clean,” “biohazard,” and worse). We explore why stigma remains one of the biggest barriers to testing, disclosure, and wellbeing — even when the science is crystal clear.

From there, the episode looks forward: injectable PrEP, long-acting ART, broadly neutralising antibodies, mRNA research, and what a future cure might realistically look like. Crucially, we centre the role of people living with HIV — whose participation and advocacy underpin every prevention breakthrough we now benefit from.

This is a grounded, respectful, forward-looking episode that connects HIV to broader questions of justice, equity, and community care — and reminds us that ending HIV isn’t just biomedical. It’s social.

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

Bisexual, pansexual, fluid, questioning — or just tired of being told you’re “actually gay” or “basically straight”? In this week’s Hide and Seek, Jon and Craig are joined by CJ and Little Jase for a big, honest, frequently hilarious conversation about what it really means to live Bi+ in queer, kink, health, and dating spaces.

Picking up from Big Bi+ Questions deep dive into Bi+ sexual health, the episode starts with a reality check: Bi+ people consistently have some of the worst sexual-health outcomes, not because of behaviour, but because we’re routinely erased from messaging. From “MSM” labels that don’t fit, to GPs who don’t know what to ask, the panel unpacks how stigma, data gaps, and awkward assumptions shape care — and why regular testing and shame-free conversations still matter.

From there, things get messier (in a good way). We talk kink and pansexual spaces as unexpected sites of belonging, where gender matters less than consent, communication, and what you’re actually there to do. There are stories of inclusive dance floors, not-quite-inclusive venues, and why “gender-inclusive” doesn’t always mean welcoming — especially for women, trans people, and disabled Bi+ folks.

The episode also tackles dating apps and the “double life” problem: blank profiles, safety risks, Bi+-phobia from all directions, and the emotional labour of being someone’s first safe conversation. Add in Pride, parties, tokenism, chosen family, and the ongoing question of “where do we fit?”, and you’ve got a full-spectrum look at Bi+ life beyond the stereotypes.

Funny, sharp, and deeply human, A Bi and Beyond is a reminder that Bi+ people don’t sit in the middle — we exist everywhere.

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This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au

Play parties can be exhilarating, intimidating, sexy, awkward, joyful — and sometimes all of those at once. In this episode of Hide and Seek, the team break down what play parties rules actually are, why they exist, and how to show up in ways that keep everyone safer, respected, and having a good time.

We start with the bigger picture: play parties as cultural spaces — not just places to hook up, but environments built around consent, chosen family, learning, ritual, and queer and kink community. From lounge-room rope nights to commercial dungeons, pup mosh pits to quiet, atmospheric events, we explore the different types of play parties and how expectations shift depending on the space you’re in.

Then we get into the practical stuff — the universal do’s and don’ts. How to ask before touching anything (including gear). How to express interest without being creepy. When watching is okay, when it’s not, and why interrupting a scene is a fast track to getting escorted out. There are stories, cautionary tales, and reminders that “no” and “not right now” are complete sentences.

The second half of the episode focuses on safety and aftercare — not just physical care, but emotional reality. We talk about drop, nerves, first-time jitters, mess, tears, and why kindness and discretion matter just as much as floggers and tarps. Whether you’re new, curious, or a seasoned attendee, this episode is about navigating play spaces with confidence, care, and consent.

Because great etiquette isn’t complicated — it’s asking, listening, and remembering that play parties are about trust, not entitlement.

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Follow Craig instagram.com/white.dragon.339/

This episode was recorded on the lands of the Yalukut Weelam clan of the Boon Wurrung peoples. We pay our respects to their elders, past, present and emerging, and acknowledge that sovereignty was never ceded.

Find other JOY podcasts at joy.org.au