“Dare to do that action. Dare to go for what you've been holding yourself back. Because passion never comes like a scream. It's always a whisper.” Besa Martini

I am thrilled to share this deeply meaningful episode of Girl Out of Order with you — one of the conversations I lean on the most when I think about growth, identity, grit, and what it means to get unstuck from old stories. I sit down with my coach, Master Coach Besa Martini (of Tony Robbins fame), who has transformed my life in ways I never saw coming. Together we explore how she moved across continents, wrestled with identity, leaned into possibility, and how we women can do the same — especially when our “shitty committee” (you know what I mean) is telling us to shrink.

In this episode, we dive into: the power of story (the ones we tell ourselves vs. the ones we can write), the triad — physiology, focus, language — as a tool for becoming the person you want to be before the evidence is there, and the courage to fail, to invest, to believe. If your heart has ever been saying, “there’s got to be more,” this episode is a love letter for you.

Timeline Highlights

TimeMoment & Why It Matters

[6:43] | Besa shares what it was like arriving in America 23 years ago, and how she navigated being an immigrant, having an accent, and holding onto her roots while daring to grow.
[12:30] | She describes the moment she decided “things have to change” — how witnessing suffering led her to re-evaluate what she was accepting in her own life.
[20:45] | A powerful reframing: certainty doesn’t precede action — it’s action that creates certainty. How she moved forward even without knowing the full roadmap.
[25:00] | The triad (physiology / focus / language): how we’re constantly choosing who we show up as, moment by moment; what changes when we shift those three things.
[36:00] | Besa speaks directly to the strong, fiery women (Enneagram 8s, Dynamo DISC, etc.) who have been told they are “too much” — and what it really takes to reclaim and embody your power.
[46:30] | Sowing seeds, patience, momentum: the metaphors that remind us growth is messy, slow, full of “no visible results,” yet unfolding behind what we see.
[50:40] | For the woman at the threshold — the one grieving an emptied nest, unsure who she is without her “roles” — Besa offers the first little actions to step toward possibility.

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“Put a period at the end of the sentence. Evil is evil. Period.”

This week’s episode is deeply personal, raw, and filled with reflection. Originally, I had planned to bring you an inspiring conversation with my coach, Bessa Martini, but after the heartbreaking events in Utah, I felt compelled to speak directly to you from the depths of my soul. This episode is a call for unity, a reminder of our shared humanity, and a challenge to choose love, curiosity, and grace in a time where division is screaming louder than ever.

I invite you into a space of deep contemplation—about how we react to tragedy, how we treat one another in disagreement, and what it means to truly live as a Girl Out of Order. Whether you’ve felt confusion, anger, or heartbreak over recent events, I ask you to walk with me in this episode as we re-center ourselves around compassion, connection, and bold, bridge-building love. No politics. Just humanity. Period.

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"When we treat old stories like safety blankets, we forget they’re actually straight jackets—suffocating our potential and robbing us of joy."

Sisters, this one’s personal. This final episode in the Letting Go When Your Heart Wants to Hold On series may be the most important message I’ve ever shared on the Girl Out of Order podcast. We're peeling back the layers and diving into something that touches every single one of us—our stories. The ones we whisper to ourselves when no one else is listening. The ones that keep us stuck, small, and safe... or so we think.

In this episode, I'm inviting you into a raw and real conversation about the old stories we hold onto like safety blankets, even when they’ve become straight jackets. I walk you through how to identify the BS narratives that no longer serve you, how to challenge them, and most importantly, how to rewrite them. This isn't just about motivation—this is about transformation. You’re holding the pen, sister. So let’s write a new story together.

Timeline Summary:
[2:22] - Why our old stories feel safe—and why they’re secretly suffocating us
[6:45] - From comfort to captivity: How “safety blankets” become straight jackets
[9:38] - The whispers that define our destiny—recognizing the subtle lies we believe
[13:19] - Real-life role models and the power of rewriting your story
[20:28] - Why your story shapes your identity and your possibilities
[24:42] - Tactical tools to name, reframe, and replace your limiting beliefs
[26:57] - Finding mirrors, not echoes: Building a tribe that reflects your greatness [29:14] - How to audit your internal stories and take action toward the life you deserve

Letting go isn't easy, but it is essential. If this series moved you, helped you, or fired you up—please rate, review, follow, and share the Girl Out of Order podcast. Let’s grow this bold, beautiful community of women rewriting their stories and reclaiming their power.

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