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Exercising Self-Control: From Fitness To Flourishing

Exercising Self-Control: From Fitness To Flourishing

De: Korey Samuelson
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Discover how you can master the principles, skills, and systems of virtuous self-control through your fitness practice. Move beyond conditioning your body to improving your entire life.

stoicstrength.substack.comKorey Samuelson Actividad Física, Dietas y Nutrición Ejercicio y Actividad Física Higiene y Vida Saludable
Episodios
  • Why Your Bedroom Could Be Your Best Self-Improvement Opportunity

    Why Your Bedroom Could Be Your Best Self-Improvement Opportunity
    Nov 11 2025

    In the next few days, if you take on this task, you’ll improve a small part of your home. This isn’t just about getting organized, though that’ll happen, it’s about acquiring a mindset that can transform every aspect of your life.

    Hey there. It’s me, Kore. And you’re listening to Exercising Self-Control: From Fitness To Flourishing.

    Here’s what you do. Pick a small room where you live and commit to spending 30 to 60 minutes per day improving this room to a new standard of excellence. I recommend your bedroom but if that’s not practical choose another space.

    Getting Started

    Have a look at the room you’ll be improving. To keep this from being too clunky I’ll refer to “the bedroom” from now on.

    What do you see when looking at your bedroom? Is everything where you want it to be? Does anything need to be cleaned or repaired or upgraded? Does anything need to be removed? Would adding something make it better?

    The main question you want to answer is, “What would make this bedroom an excellent bedroom?”

    Make a list of everything you’d like to change as it occurs to you. When the list is complete, put the changes you’d like to make in priority order. That is, the most important first down to the least important.

    The Process

    Work on number one until complete. Then move onto number two, three, etc. Work for 30 to 60 minutes every day until everything has been done. Now you have an excellent bedroom according to your own standard.

    Photo by Spacejoy on Unsplash

    After completing this first improvement project, you can move onto other areas you’d like to improve. This can be other spaces in your home or beyond.

    Beyond Your Home

    This same approach will transform your other life areas.

    * Work Appraise your email management, project workflow, meeting efficiency, workspace organization. Prioritize and improve systematically.

    * Relationships Consider your communication, conflict resolution patterns, quality time systems, and shared responsibility structures. Which improvement would make the biggest difference?

    * Health Examine your sleep habits, eating patterns, exercise routines, stress management, and medical care systems. Apply the same prioritization and systematic improvement approach.

    What Happens As A Result

    You’ll know you’ve internalized this life improvement mindset when you find yourself approaching problems systematically rather than feeling overwhelmed by complexity. This mental framework reduces stress, simplifies decision-making, and creates lasting change because you’re taking on the responsibility for making your life better.

    You see what needs doing, organize a project around that, and get to work.

    Whether organizing your kitchen or restructuring your career, the approach remains the same: step back, identify the current reality, set a new standard, prioritize improvements, and work methodically through your list.

    Going forward, investing the time and effort in ever expanding areas, you’ll acquire something more valuable than an excellent life. You’ll develop a perspective and mindset that applies in any circumstance. Your focus becomes channeled toward continuous improvement as a way of life.

    Start Today

    Give this a go. Your first simple improvement project is waiting. The mindset transformation that’s possible can be the start of something truly life changing.

    That’s it for today. Catch you next time.



    This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit stoicstrength.substack.com
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    4 m
  • Keep Yourself Consistent With Your Word

    Keep Yourself Consistent With Your Word
    Nov 10 2025
    In goal achievement, accountability is often suggested to help with success. The concept is straightforward. Get a coach or a partner who serves as an external resource to help you keep your word. Whether it’s waking up at 6 a.m. consistently or sticking to a workout routine, these accountability systems provide outside influence and support.But here’s the thing: you can lie to a coach, deceive your accountability partner, and even attempt to fool yourself. However, the third option, self-deception, fails 100% of the time. You always know exactly what happened.Here I’m talking specifically about scenarios you have determined clearly beforehand what your behaviour is going to be. An assignment or task, for example. A coach might not discover your failure, your partner might remain oblivious, but you know. This is why personal accountability trumps all external systems.Hey there. It’s me, Kore. And you’re listening to Exercising Self-Control: From Fitness To Flourishing.The Natural Inclination Toward Self-DeceptionOur brains naturally resist accountability because acknowledging failure triggers discomfort. We rationalize (“just five more minutes of work”), minimize (“missing sleep one night won’t hurt”), and deflect (“I’ll make up for it tomorrow”). Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward breaking them.Possible Counter-Arguments To “You Can’t Lie to Yourself”Now, is it true we can’t lie to ourselves? This, as in many things, depends. There are forms of self-deception that occur non-consciously that are possible.1. Psychological Defence Mechanisms: Psychologists have extensively documented how our minds protect us through denial, repression, and rationalization. People genuinely convince themselves that harmful behaviours aren’t problematic. For example, alcoholics who truly believe they “don’t have a drinking problem”, or workaholics who sincerely think their 80-hour weeks are “temporary”. These aren’t conscious lies. They’re non-conscious self-protection mechanisms.2. Cognitive Dissonance and Compartmentalization: We’re capable of holding contradictory beliefs simultaneously. Someone might genuinely believe they value health while consistently making unhealthy choices without experiencing the internal conflict you’d expect. They’ve compartmentalized these beliefs so effectively they don’t register the contradiction.3. The Neuroscience of Self-Deception: Brain imaging studies show that self-deception activates different neural pathways than conscious lying. When we successfully deceive ourselves, we’re not accessing the same “truth detection” systems that would catch us lying to others. The brain literally processes self-deception differently.4. Gradual Boundary Erosion: The “one-more-minute” phenomenon works precisely because each individual extension beyond the boundary feels insignificant. People aren’t lying about their bedtime. They’re genuinely convincing themselves that “this time is different”, or “this exception is justified”.5. The Motivational Blindness Effect: Research shows that when we’re highly motivated to achieve something, we genuinely don’t “see” ethical violations or boundary breaches. It’s not conscious deception. Our motivation literally blinds us to information that conflicts with our goals.And finally, perhaps the most compelling challenge is that if we truly couldn’t lie to ourselves, self-deception wouldn’t be such a universal human struggle requiring constant vigilance and external systems to overcome.This counter-perspective suggests that personal accountability requires developing the skill of honest self-awareness rather than simply relying on an innate inability to self-deceive.My PositionMy position, as always, is that what we do non-consciously is not up to us as a matter of choice in the moment. What we can do is make conscious choices. That’s it. Those conscious choices are best when consistent with the person we intend to be, the values we aspire to live, and the goals we strive to realize. It’s these conscious intentions with which we can purposefully condition our non-conscious behaviours and processes.And when we have clarity on our intentions, we can develop the integrity required to more effectively live the life we prefer. It’s from this perspective that we can become more honest about our own choices.That said, let’s get to the practicalities.Photo by Brett Jordan on UnsplashCommon Self-Deception PatternsBeyond my own bedtime struggles where I far too regularly postpone sleep for “just one more thing”, people commonly lie to themselves about:* Diet choices: “This cheat meal doesn’t count.”* Financial habits: “I’ll budget starting next month.”* Exercise routines: “I’ll work out twice as hard tomorrow.”* Relationship boundaries: “I’ll address this issue later.”The Predictable Consequences Of Self-DeceptionWhen we break ...
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    9 m
  • How To Build More Strength By Establishing "Neurological Trust"

    How To Build More Strength By Establishing "Neurological Trust"
    Nov 9 2025
    Have you ever wondered why your pull-ups suddenly fail even though your back muscles feel fine? Or why you can lift one leg high to the side but can’t do a full split? The answer lies in a fundamental principle that governs your movement: Neurological Trust.Hey there. It’s me, Kore. And you’re listening to Exercising Self-Control: From Fitness To Flourishing.A Strong Foundation = A Strong PerformanceWhen you do pull-ups your grip strength often determines your overall performance. Not because your lats aren’t strong enough, necessarily, but because your brain operates on a simple safety protocol. If your grip is weak, your nervous system doesn’t trust that you can maintain good contact with the pull-up bar. This neurological override actually reduces the strength signals sent to your pulling muscles, limiting your performance before your prime movers even fatigue.Studies in motor control and biomechanics have demonstrated this phenomenon across multiple movement patterns. When your brain perceives instability or weakness at any point in the kinetic chain, it inhibits force production as a protective mechanism. This neurological inhibition affects everything from strength to flexibility to coordination.The Grip-Strength Connection: Building TrustThe solution starts with building that “neurological trust” through foundational strength. For pull-ups, this means developing your grip endurance. For example, you could build up to a 45 to 60 second dead hang with a few sets at the end of your resistance workouts.It makes sense, doesn’t it? If someone is able to do a set of 10 to 15 pull ups they’ll be hanging on the bar between 30 to 45 seconds depending on the speed of their reps. If they can’t hang that long they obviously won’t be able to complete their set. That’s why many people use lifting straps. I believe it’s better to improve your grip strength so you can access your pulling strength at any time, no lifting straps needed.Me, mid-pull-up, when I was coaching regularly at an obstacle course racing gym (circa 2020). My grip strength was at an all-time high during this time.This same principle applies to rowing movements, bent-over rows, and single-arm dumbbell rows, for example. When your grip is solid your brain directs a fuller neural drive to the prime movers.Beyond Grip: The Flexibility RevolutionThis neurological override doesn’t just affect pulling movements, it also changes how we understand flexibility. Current research suggests that what we perceive as “tight muscles” is often neurological inhibition, not tissue limitation.Consider the side split. Stand and lift one leg to the side as high as possible. Note that angle. Now attempt a seated side split. Despite having the same hip joints, you likely can’t achieve that same angle on both sides at the same time. Physiologically, there’s no tissue connecting your adductors from one leg to the other. Your brain is the limiting factor.Passive, or what’s also called relaxed, stretching doesn’t address this neurological issue. Instead you need to train the stretch under load (i.e. moving into a stretch while using resistance) or with a method called “contract-relax” or PNF (i.e. proprioceptive neuromuscular facilitation) stretching.If you’d like to try the “contract-relax” method:* Move into your stretch position* Contract the stretched muscle for 5 seconds* Relax and then move slightly deeper* Repeat 3-5 timesThis teaches your nervous system to trust new ranges of motion by demonstrating strength throughout the movement.The Balance Factor: Stability Unlocks StrengthThe neurological trust principle becomes most obvious with balance challenges. When you’re unstable (e.g. when performing a single-leg Romanian deadlift) your brain prioritizes balance over power. Every micro-adjustment to maintain stability diverts neural resources from your prime movers to your stabilizing muscles.If you do the same exercise with just a slight hand support, you can immediately handle more weight or perform more repetitions. The stability allows your nervous system to dedicate a fuller effort to the intended movement pattern.This is why squatting on unstable surfaces, like a Bosu ball, is counterproductive for building leg strength. You’re not training your quadriceps and glutes from a solid base. Instead, you’re training your balance reflexes while your brain inhibits force production for safety.Determine Your Strength Training ScenarioSo, before blaming weak muscles during any resistance exercise you may be doing, ask yourself:* Is my foundation solid?* Am I fighting for balance?* Do I have strength through the full range of motion?Do your best to move through a full range of motion when resistance training. This has you naturally moving into a stretched position under load which trains your neurology to trust your strength at those ranges.The LessonYour brain will inhibit strength, movement, and flexibility when it...
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    7 m
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