Episode Overview

Join host Jamie Baxter from Exodus 90 for Episode 24 of Desert Fathers in a Year, titled “On Discernment: Three Approaches.” This episode continues the exploration of the fifth chapter of the Desert Fathers’ systematic collection on lust, featuring a profound saying from Abba Anthony. Guided by Bishop Eric Varden, the episode situates Christian sexuality within human dignity and flourishing, distinguishing natural eros from destructive lust. Recorded during the Kings of Summer initiative, this reflection offers practical wisdom for men seeking to channel their desires toward Christ-like love.

Key Themes and Reflections

• Abba Anthony’s Saying: Abba Anthony identifies three types of bodily movement: (1) natural physical urges, neutral and good when guided by the soul; (2) lust fueled by overindulgence in food and drink, linked to gluttony; and (3) demonic impulses driven by spiritual malice, inducing sadness and despair. These distinctions provide a framework for discerning and combating lust.
• Chastity and Human Flourishing: Bishop Varden emphasizes that the Desert Fathers were not opposed to eros or sex within marriage but condemned porneia (lust as transaction, akin to prostitution). Chastity aligns body and soul, fostering love and happiness, not stifling desire.
• Reclaiming Anthony’s Wisdom: Contrary to Enlightenment views of Anthony as an unlettered ascetic, his letters reveal intellectual depth. His nuanced approach to lust—affirming natural urges while warning against imbalance and demonic influence—could prevent much pain if taught in seminaries and marriage preparation.
• Body and Soul in Harmony: Anthony’s teaching rejects the notion that bodily urges are inherently sinful. The pursuit of chastity seeks to restore the fruitful complementarity of body and soul, made in God’s image, through discerning reason and disciplined habits.
• Practical Discernment: To combat lust, Anthony advises moderating food and drink to equilibrate appetite, avoiding places of past sin, and limiting alcohol (e.g., “never take more than three cups”). Prayer and compunction drive out demonic impulses, elevating the mind toward God’s love.
• Cultural Misconceptions: The episode challenges the view of Christian sexuality as puritanical, highlighting how lust sabotages self and others. By understanding lust’s roots—natural, indulgent, or demonic—men can redirect passions toward life-giving love.

Scriptural and Literary Connections

• Ephesians 5:18: “Do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery,” cited by Anthony to warn against lust fueled by excess.
• Luke 21:34: Jesus’ command, “Be on guard so that your hearts are not weighed down with dissipation and drunkenness,” underscores the need for vigilance.
• Athanasius’ Life of Anthony: Reveals Anthony’s rejection of pagan culture, not learning, affirming his intellectual depth.
• Bishop Varden’s Chastity: Reconciliation of the Senses: Frames chastity as a path to flourishing, aligning with Anthony’s discernment of desire.

Action Items for Listeners

1. Discern Bodily Movements: Reflect on Anthony’s three types of lust. Are your urges natural, fueled by excess, or spiritually destructive? Journal your observations to grow in self-awareness.
2. Moderate Appetites: Limit food, drink, or alcohol this week (e.g., skip a second...

Do you have a question for Bishop Varden? Submit your questions here.

Episode Overview

Join host Jamie Baxter from Exodus 90 and guests Adam, Doyle, and Jared for the bonus roundtable discussion of Episode 23 of Desert Fathers in a Year, titled “Lust.” This episode marks the start of a new focus on the fifth chapter of the Desert Fathers’ systematic collection, exploring the timeless wisdom of Abba Poemen on combating lust and anger. With insights from Bishop Varden’s book Chastity: Reconciliation of the Senses, the discussion reframes chastity as a path to human flourishing, not a restrictive rule. Recorded during the Kings of Summer initiative, this episode offers practical guidance for men seeking transformation in Christ amidst a culture wounded by the sexual revolution.

Key Themes and Reflections

• Abba Poemen’s Saying: A brother, struggling with lust and anger, seeks advice from Abba Poemen, who references David’s triumph over the lion and bear (1 Samuel 17:34-36) to illustrate cutting off anger and squeezing out lust through labor. Poemen warns that lovers of pleasure and money cannot live according to God, emphasizing disciplined effort to redirect passions.
• Chastity as Flourishing: Jared highlights Bishop Varden’s reframe of chastity as thriving, not a killjoy rule. Drawing from Deus Caritas Est by Pope Benedict XVI, he distinguishes eros (legitimate longing for love) from lust (self-focused distortion), countering cultural misconceptions that equate all desire with lust.
• Cultural Crisis and Wounded Healers: The sexual revolution has wounded both society and the Church, creating timidity in teaching chastity due to scandals and cultural malaise. Jared notes that even Church leaders are “wounded healers,” yet the Church upholds human dignity through teachings like John Paul II’s Theology of the Body.
• Lust vs. Fatherhood: Jared contrasts the vampire-like nature of lust—draining life for selfish pleasure—with fatherhood, which gives life through self-sacrifice. This aligns with Poemen’s call to redirect passions toward fruitful love, addressing the cultural confusion encapsulated in “love is love.”
• Historical Parallels: Doyle draws from Greek and Roman sexuality, citing Plato’s Symposium and Aristophanes’ works to show that modern sexual confusion is not new. Socrates’ view of love as a pursuit of reason (logos, fulfilled in Christ) prefigures Christian chastity, offering hope that ancient struggles found resolution in truth.
• Lust in Context: Adam shares a young man’s testimony that freedom from lust came not from fixating on it but by addressing deeper issues (e.g., anger, loneliness) through a holistic Christian life. Bishop Varden and Dorothy Sayers note the overemphasis on lust, neglecting other deadly sins like pride, which distorts virtue’s meaning.
• HALT Acronym: Adam introduces the HALT acronym (Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired) as a tool to identify underlying triggers for sin, including lust. Addressing these root causes—hunger, anger, loneliness, or fatigue—helps men make better choices and fosters human flourishing.

Scriptural and Literary Connections

• 1 Samuel 17:34-36: David’s victory over the lion and bear, referenced by Poemen, symbolizes overcoming anger and lust through disciplined effort.
• Deus Caritas Est by Pope Benedict XVI: Links eros and agape, affirming the legitimacy of human longing when ordered toward selfless love.
• Theology of the Body by St. John Paul II: Roots Catholic sexual morality in human dignity, freedom,...

Submit your questions to Bishop Erik Varden by emailing hello@desertfathers.com.

This episode delves into the Desert Fathers' insights on lust, drawing from Abba Poemen’s counsel to a brother wrestling with lust and anger. We explore how the Fathers understood lust (porneia) as distinct from eros, emphasizing its self-centered nature and its opposition to true freedom in Christ. The discussion challenges modern cultural myths about sexual liberation and situates Christian teachings on sexuality within a broader vision of virtue and human flourishing.

• Abba Poemen: “On account of this David said, ‘I smote the lion, I strangled the bear,’ which is to say, I cut off anger and by labours I squeezed the life out of lust.”
• Abba Poemen: “You cannot live according to God if you are a lover of pleasure and a lover of money.”
• Dorothy L. Sayers (1941, The Other Six Deadly Sins): “Perhaps the bitterest commentary on the way in which Christian doctrine has been taught in the last few centuries is the fact that to the majority of people the word ‘immorality’ has come to mean one thing and one thing only.”

1. Christian Teaching on Sexuality: Christian moral doctrine focuses on thriving, dignity, and freedom in Christ, not merely restriction. The Desert Fathers help reframe sexuality within this holistic vision.
2. Lust vs. Eros: The Fathers used porneia to describe lust, a self-focused desire akin to prostitution, contrasting it with eros, which seeks mutual connection. Lust isolates, while eros yearns for another.
3. Cultural Narratives: Modern culture often views lust as liberating, but the Fathers saw it as blinding, locking individuals in self-centeredness. Has “sexual liberation” truly freed us?
4. Lust’s Deeper Roots: Poemen links lust to anger, suggesting it may reflect deeper passions like rage or greed. This perspective sheds light on societal issues like sexual abuse and manipulation.
5. Transcendence and Meaning: In a secular age, sex is often a substitute for transcendence. The Fathers invite us to redirect desire toward God, fostering true freedom over fleeting pleasure.

• How do cultural views of lust as “freedom” shape our understanding of intimacy?
• What might underlying emotions like anger reveal about struggles with lust?
• How can the Desert Fathers’ wisdom help us live out a balanced Christian approach to sexuality?

• Bishop Erik Varden, Chastity: Reconciliation of the Senses
• Dorothy L. Sayers, The Other Six Deadly Sins (1941, Public Morality Council address).
• The Sayings of the Desert Fathers, focusing on Abba Poemen’s teachings.
• The Book of Job, for reflections on embodied desire for God.

Share your thoughts or questions by emailing Bishop Erik Varden at hello@desertfathers.com. Join us for the next episode as we continue our journey with the Desert Fathers.

In this Bonus Roundtable for Episode 22 of Desert Fathers in a Year, host Jamie Baxter, joined by Adam Doyle and Jared, dives into the profound saying of Abba Makarios from the Systematic Collection of the Desert Fathers. The discussion explores the balance between personal austerity and communal charity, reflecting on how the Desert Fathers’ wisdom challenges modern tendencies toward vanity and self-centeredness. This episode concludes the series’ focus on self-mastery before transitioning to the topic of lust next month.

Abba Makarios’ Saying: Abba Makarios accepted wine from his brethren to honor their hospitality but compensated by abstaining from water for a day per cup consumed—a severe act of hidden austerity. His disciple intervened, urging the brethren to stop offering wine to prevent Makarios from over disciplining himself.

Reversing Vanity: Jamie highlights the human tendency to be indulgent at home while projecting austerity in public, driven by vanity. The Desert Fathers challenge this, urging hidden discipline and outward charity, aligning with Christ’s call to avoid performative piety (Matthew 6:16-18).

Charity as the Goal: Jared emphasizes that asceticism is not an end but a means to cultivate love for God and neighbor. The Fathers’ practices, like relaxing disciplines for others’ sake, reveal a deeper purpose: fostering communion over self-display.

Learning from the Body: Adam reflects on how the body’s natural longing for food mirrors the heart’s desire for God. Asceticism trains us to prioritize spiritual hunger, countering modern distractions that dull this longing.

Hospitality and Discernment: The panel discusses the importance of receiving others’ gifts with gratitude, even if they conflict with personal disciplines. Jamie shares Bishop Varden’s insight: “Principles are important, but more beneficial still is readiness to transcend one’s individual fixed ideas.”

Practical Challenges: Adam recounts personal anecdotes—offering a beer to a fasting Byzantine priest and a Benedictine monk eating unpalatable hot sauce out of courtesy—illustrating the need to prioritize others’ feelings over rigid rules. These stories echo the Fathers’ emphasis on joyful acceptance.

Avoiding Empty Practices: Jamie cites Bishop Varden’s warning that public displays of austerity can render practices meaningless, squandering spiritual rewards. He references a Newman sermon on St. John, who built his eternal inheritance through hidden sacrifices.

Receive with Gratitude: When offered food, drink, or hospitality, accept it with joy, even if it doesn’t align with your preferences or disciplines. Offer any discomfort as a small act of self-denial.

Practice Hidden Austerity: Follow the Fathers’ example by keeping your spiritual disciplines private, avoiding the temptation to showcase your piety.

Discern with Charity: When faced with conflicts between personal rules and communal needs, prioritize love for others, discerning when to relax or uphold your practices.

Reflect on Intentions: When offering hospitality, consider the recipient’s needs rather than your own desires. Ensure your actions build communion, not self-satisfaction.

“Principles are important, but more beneficial still is readiness to transcend one’s individual fixed ideas.” – Bishop Erik Varden

“A true ascetic will rejoice more in occasions to mortify self-will than in displaying the rigor of his or her observance.” – Bishop Erik Varden

“When we put on a show, we lose the reward. It loses its meaning.” – Jamie Baxter

Subscribe: Visit DesertFathers.com to join our email newsletter and submit questions for Bishop Varden’s upcoming Q&A in early...

In Episode 22 of Desert Fathers in a Year, we continue our journey into the wisdom of the Desert Fathers, focusing on self-mastery through the lens of Abba Makarios’ life. This episode explores the delicate balance between personal asceticism and communal charity, drawing from a saying in the Systematic Collection of the Desert Fathers. Host Jamie Baxter and Bishop Erik Varden reflect on how the Fathers discreetly practiced austerity while prioritizing love and fellowship with others.

• Self-Mastery and Speech: The Desert Fathers emphasized controlling speech, as it reflects the heart’s state. Examples include Abba Anthony’s visitor likening careless speech to an unkept donkey, Abba Aqilas spitting out an evil word turned to blood, and Abba Sarapion’s transformative confession.
• Hidden Austerity: Inspired by Christ’s teaching in Matthew 6:16-18, the Fathers hid their ascetic practices to avoid vanity. Abba Makarios exemplifies this by accepting wine from his brethren but secretly compensating with extreme self-discipline.
• Charity Over Rigidity: The Fathers valued courtesy and fellowship over strict adherence to personal rules. Refusing hospitality, like declining food during Lent, could dishonor hosts and reflect self-satisfaction rather than humility.
• Balancing Love and Discipline: Abba Makarios’ story illustrates accepting others’ kindness (e.g., drinking wine) to honor their generosity while privately maintaining his spiritual purpose through acts of renunciation, like abstaining from water for a day.
• Discernment in Charity: The episode cautions against using charity as an excuse for indulgence. Abba Sissos advises seeking rational, love-driven answers when navigating social obligations, avoiding intemperance.

Abba Makarios, when offered wine by his brethren, accepted it joyfully to honor their fellowship, despite its potential to hinder his prayer. To maintain his ascetic commitment, he disciplined himself by forgoing water for a full day per cup of wine consumed—a radical act in the desert’s harsh climate. His disciple, noticing the toll, urged the brethren to stop offering wine, revealing Makarios’ hidden austerity. This story underscores:

• The importance of accepting hospitality to build community.
• The need for personal discipline to remain true to one’s spiritual goals.
• The value of discerning higher goods, prioritizing others’ honor over self-display.

• Hospitality and Intent: The episode challenges listeners to consider whether their acts of kindness are truly for others or for personal gratification.
• Humility in Action: A story of Abbot John highlights choosing humility over correction, as he endured a night lost in the desert to avoid shaming his guide.
• Practical Application: Listeners are encouraged to practice tactful acceptance of others’ offerings and to discern when to relax or uphold personal disciplines for the sake of love.

The Desert Fathers teach us to balance personal austerity with communal charity. True asceticism lies not in rigid rule-following but in discerning when to set aside practices for love’s sake and when to take them up again in pursuit of self-mastery. As we approach Easter’s fifty-day season, let us emulate Abba Makarios’ example of hidden discipline and outward charity.

In this bonus roundtable discussion for Episode 21 of Desert Fathers in a Year, host Jamie Baxter and guests Adam, Doyle, and Jared dive into the fourth chapter of the systematic collection of the Desert Fathers, focusing on self-mastery. The episode explores a powerful saying attributed to Abba Serapion, highlighting the liberating power of confession, the importance of vulnerability, and the role of spiritual fathers in overcoming sin. The discussion emphasizes the timeless wisdom of the Desert Fathers and its relevance for modern Christian life, encouraging listeners to embrace truth, communion, and accountability.

• Saying Summary: Abba Serapion, as a young monk, secretly stole rusks (hard bread) after meals, unable to resist the urge due to shame and silence. When visitors prompted his elder, Abba Theanas, to speak about hiding thoughts and self-control, Serapion was convicted, confessed his sin, and experienced a dramatic spiritual liberation, symbolized by a fiery lamp and sulfurous stink leaving his chest.
• Liberating Truth: The panel reflects on the transformative power of confessing sins, which breaks the isolation and despair fostered by hidden habits. Serapion’s confession not only freed him but became a testimony passed down through generations (from Abba Theanas to Abba Moses to Abba Cassian).
• Modern Relevance: In an individualistic culture valuing privacy, the saying challenges listeners to reject the “demonic” tendency to withhold weaknesses, emphasizing vulnerability as a path to communion with God and others.

• Relational Healing: Jared highlights Bishop Varden’s insight that Serapion’s sin created a relational wedge between him and his spiritual father. Confession restored this communion, underscoring the necessity of spiritual fathers to guide and reflect God’s fatherly love.
• Communal Beings: As bodily and social beings, humans need earthly mentors to embody divine accountability and love. The panel contrasts this with modern dualism, where one might rely solely on a distant “heavenly Father” without earthly guidance.
• Father Wound: The absence or rejection of spiritual fathers can hinder spiritual growth, mirroring the impact of a biological father wound.

• Legacy of Names: Doyle notes the saying’s chain of attribution (Cassian, Moses, Serapion, Theanas), reflecting the Desert Fathers’ humility and unity. They sought no personal fame, blending into a cohesive tradition rooted in St. Anthony, as Bishop Varden emphasized.
• Timeless Words: The careful preservation of these names and words, despite the “tsunami” of modern information, underscores their spiritual power, memorized and transmitted for 1,700 years.

• Confession as Icebreaker: Doyle shares a personal experience from an Exodus 90 Freedom Summit, where men’s vulnerable confessions of struggles (anger, alcohol, lust) united 200 participants, proving that shared accountability fosters communion and healing.
• Reciprocal Vulnerability: In small groups, leading with openness (e.g., Doyle’s sharing of past struggles with drugs and alcohol) sets a tone for authentic sharing, countering surface-level conversations.
• Bishop Varden’s Warning: Hidden habits and half-truths give the “hater of good” (the devil) an opportunity. Bringing sins to light through confession is the path to freedom.

🏜️ Welcome to Desert Fathers in a Year!

In today’s episode, we explore the powerful story of Abba Serapion, who struggled with a seemingly small vice—secretly stealing rusks after meals. What unfolds is a deeply human and spiritual lesson in shame, secrecy, and the liberating power of confession.

When Serapion finally confesses his hidden sin to Abba Theonas, he is immediately freed from its grip, spiritually and even physically. His story shows how silence can become a prison, and how naming our sin—however small—can break the devil’s hold on us.

We also contrast this with Abba John Kolobos, who fled rather than utter a single angry word, highlighting that while some words must be withheld, others must be spoken—for the sake of the soul.

• Hiding thoughts from spiritual guides: Why it damages us and delights the enemy
• Confession as liberation: The act of speaking the truth frees us from spiritual bondage
• The illusion of small sins: Why seemingly minor habits (like stealing dry bread) can form deeply ingrained patterns
• Subtle bondage: How secrecy fosters isolation, shame, and spiritual despair
• Spiritual psychology of the Fathers: Insight into how habits harden and how grace intervenes
• Right speech and restraint: Knowing when to speak—and when silence is an act of virtue

• James 5:16 – “Confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.”
• John Cassian’s Conferences – Source of today’s account
• Proverbs 28:13 – “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.”

1. Are there small habits in my life that I excuse or hide?
2. Do I have someone I can speak honestly with—a spiritual director, a confessor, a trusted friend?
3. Am I holding on to silence that is wounding me?
4. When have I experienced the healing power of confession or accountability?

Challenge This Week: Take five quiet minutes today and ask the Lord: “Is there a word I need to speak?” Whether to Him, a priest, or a friend—step into the light, and say what needs to be said.

Subscribe & Share: If this story challenged or encouraged you, share it with someone who needs to be reminded that God’s mercy meets us in truth—and sets us free.

We owe a special thanks to our partners. Desert Fathers in a Year is...

• 🦉...written by Bishop Erik Varden. You can follow Bishop Varden on his blog.

• 🎥 ...produced by EWTN

• 🧡...and brought to you by Exodus 90, download the Exodus 90 app today

Episode Overview

Welcome to the bonus roundtable discussion for Episode 20 of Desert Fathers in a Year, hosted by Jamie Baxter from Exodus 90. In this episode, titled "Words That Wound," Jamie is joined by Adam, Doyle, and Jared to explore a powerful saying from Abba Achillas in the Desert Fathers' systematic collection, focusing on the theme of self-mastery. The discussion delves into the spiritual, literary, and practical implications of overcoming the temptation to respond to hurtful words with bitterness, drawing parallels to Christ’s example of sacrificial love.

Key Themes and Reflections

• The Saying of Abba Achillas: An elder visits Abba Achillas and sees him spitting blood, which Achillas explains is the result of a brother’s wounding words. Rather than speaking the hurtful word, he prayed for God’s grace, transforming the word into blood, which he spat out, finding peace and forgetting his grief. This vivid imagery highlights the spiritual discipline of resisting sinful speech and absorbing pain for the sake of love.
• Self-Mastery and Christian Heroism: The hosts contrast the classical heroism of Achilles in The Iliad—driven by rage and resentment—with the Christian heroism of Abba Achillas, who absorbs betrayal and pain in imitation of Christ. Jared reflects on Hebrews 12:4, noting that resisting sin to the point of shedding blood can mean taking on personal suffering rather than inflicting it on others.
• Breaking the Cycle of Violence: Drawing on René Girard’s scapegoat theory, Doyle discusses how mimetic rivalry fuels cycles of violence, which only an innocent party—like Christ—can break. Abba Achillas’ choice to “let the evil stay with me” mirrors this, stopping the cycle of verbal violence through self-control and charity.
• Words as Weapons: The hosts explore how sarcasm, gossip, and backbiting can wound deeply, especially when coming from those closest to us. Adam shares a workplace story of being publicly blamed via email, illustrating the temptation to retaliate and the wisdom of pausing before responding.
• Philosophical Insights: Doyle engages Friedrich Nietzsche’s critique of Christian morality as disguised resentment, arguing that Abba Achillas’ actions refute this by demonstrating genuine virtue rooted in love, not bitterness. Bishop Varden’s reflection underscores that acting on passions projects a “sick vision of the world,” while overcoming them reflects spiritual health.
• Practical Struggles: Jamie shares a personal story about reacting angrily on the golf course and later in family life, highlighting how petty annoyances can trigger uncharitable speech. He also recounts receiving constructive criticism from his wife about his podcast delivery, initially reacting defensively but ultimately embracing humility to improve.

Scriptural and Literary Connections

• Romans 12:17-21: “Repay no one evil for evil… If your enemy is hungry, feed him… Overcome evil with good.” This passage frames the discussion of transforming wounds into acts of love, likened to heaping “burning coals” that purify rather than shame.
• Hebrews 12:4: “In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood.” This verse connects Achillas’ blood imagery to the Christian call to suffer for righteousness.
• The Iliad: The hosts contrast the rage of Achilles with Abba Achillas’ self-mastery, redefining heroism as sacrificial love.
• Lord of the Rings: Jamie likens Achillas’ stand against evil to Gandalf’s confrontation with the Balrog at the Bridge of Khazad-dûm, symbolizing the choice...