At the end of every episode, I ask my guests two questions. The first question is advice for parents who may be keeping a DNA surprise from their children. Most of the time, like 99% of the time, the advice is to tell. To tell because people have the right to know. To tell because trust in your parents is important. To tell because eventually, maybe generations down the line, the truth will come out.

In this week’s episode, Oscar shares his story of what happens when the child of an NPE uncovers a DNA surprise. He shares why struggled with telling his mom, what he learned about his family, and where things stand today.

Thank you for sharing your story, Oscar.

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Dad. Bio dad. Genetic father. Father. After people connect with their newfound biological fathers, they often struggle with what to call them. And what about the dads we grew up with? Raised dad. Step-dad. Birth-certificate dad. Then there’s the well-meaning but perpetually frustrating phrase, “your dad is still your dad.” Love that one.

Many of us do continue calling the dads we grew up with dad. But what if your relationship with your raised father is traumatic? What if you were always distant, and there’s no real love lost after uncovering a DNA surprise?

In this week’s episode, Luisa shares a name I hadn’t heard yet on the show - Fake Dad. She shares how she uncovered her DNA surprise and the impact that it had on her relationship with her parents, as well as the biological father she was able to identify. He’s called “New Dad,” by the way.

A quick warning before this episode begins - there is mention of childhood sexual abuse during our conversation.

Thank you for sharing your story, Luisa.

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The truth will set you free. That’s the hope, right? In this week’s episode, Joe shares how taking a test for fun led to him uncovering the truth about his paternity, which relieved him of the guilt and burden of maintaining a relationship with his birth certificate father. He also discusses how he’s connected with newfound family and what it means to him.

Thank you for sharing your story, Joe.

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Much like life, DNA surprises are rarely tied up in a perfect bow. We don’t get answers to all of the questions we have, and it’s up to us to make peace with that…or keep digging. In this week’s episode, Angie shares how she uncovered that she has a different biological father than her four sisters. She details her effort to find the truth when most of the people with answers have passed, and how she’s navigating that uncertainty.

Thank you for sharing your story, Angie.

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Welcome to season 12 of DNA Surprises.

This season marks nearly four years of sharing these stories. And while each story is unique, the threads that tie our stories together remain strong.

For example, there are many ways that people uncover their discoveries. Sometimes, people learn about their parentage through who they connect to - a new cousin, an aunt, a parent. Others are more shocked by who they don’t connect to.

In this week’s episode Michelli reveals how she learned that the man she believed was her father was not genetically related to her at all. She shares what she learned about her biological father and why her feelings about him are complicated, how she connected with her sisters, and why she doesn’t want to hear any additional stories about what happened.

Thank you for sharing your story, Michelli.

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Who would I have been if I’d known the truth about my identity? This is a question people in the DNA surprise community often ask themselves. Where would I have lived? What choices would I have made? What about my life would be different from how it is today?

In the season 11 finale of DNA Surprises, Lori shares how much of her childhood, and who she is today, was shaped by her parents’ efforts to keep her donor conception and the truth about her ethnicity a secret.

If you have a DNA surprise that you’d like to share, please submit your story at dnasurprises.com. If you’d like to support the show, please rate and review the podcast on Apple and Spotify - it really helps!

We’re taking a short break for the summer, but we’ll be back soon with new DNA surprise stories. Thank you for listening.

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Hands down the best part of hosting this podcast is the relationships I’ve been able to build with people in this community. From keeping in touch with guests turned friends, to hosting the DNA surprise retreat, to the special group of folks who join our Third Thursday meetups, I’m so grateful for the connections I’ve formed here.

In this week’s special episode, I’m joined by Jill, who first appeared on the podcast in February of last year. She has since released her second memoir, focused on her DNA surprise, so she joined me to discuss all that’s happened since we first spoke. We discuss some of my burning questions about her book, When You Shake the Family Tree, as well as where she’s currently at with her biological family. You can find your copy of Jill’s book at justbeingjill.com.

Thanks for joining me Jill.

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Oftentimes with DNA surprises, there is so much left unsaid. So many unasked questions. So many feelings are unspoken. In this week’s episode, Jennifer shares what life was like for her growing up without a father figure in her life, a fact she never really questioned throughout her childhood and adolescence.

After her mother passed, she decided to start asking questions. The first path to answering them was by taking a DNA test. Jennifer reveals what she uncovered after taking her DNA test, including a surprise ethnicity shift and a family who welcomed her with open arms.

Thank you for sharing your story, Jennifer.

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