Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Question: We very recently brought home our second child through domestic infant adoption. We feel very fortunate, and our son is developing well; we are also settling into the new routine. We matched with our Son's birth mother through a local agency, and unfortunately, she decided that she did not want to meet us. She gave no information about the biological father. We know she was caucasian, but honestly, it is unclear whether our son is entirely caucasian or not. The pediatrician said it was a mystery, and he may be caucasian with a darker complexion, or biracial, some amount of Hispanic, black, or any other heritage. We want to do everything in our power to be informed, acknowledge, and celebrate any ethnic background that is presented, but short of doing a DNA ancestry service on a baby that is a few weeks old, I don't really know where to begin- I'd appreciate any guidance you have.

Resources:

• Raising a Transracial or Multicultural Child
• Adoptee Voices
• Ethical Issues in Genetic Testing in Adoption
• Genetic Testing and Genealogy for Adoptees
• Genetic Testing for Adoptees – Is It Worth It?

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Do you worry about the impacts that screen time, social media, or gaming have on your tween and teens' mental health? We spoke to Brittany Anderson, an author, certified play and narrative intelligence practitioner, and the founder of Renala, which helps families become creative, vision-driven leaders—beginning at home.

In this episode, we discuss:

• What are the most common concerns that parents and caregivers have about their tween or teen’s tech use?
• Are those concerns more about the amount of time kids spend on devices, the content they’re seeking out, or the content they stumble upon?
• What are the differences in concerns between parents of pre-teens/tweens (11–13) and older teens (16–18)?
• What does current research say about how much screen time is considered healthy—or at least not harmful—for our tweens and teens?
  • Is the amount of time as important as how that time is being spent?
  • Are there particular times of day when device use is more problematic for mental health (e.g., late at night)?
• What types of online content are most worrisome for the tweens and teens in our homes?
• What mental health effects are we seeing most often in tweens and teens related to tech use?
• What are the symptoms of mental health that parents and caregivers should look for?
• Why might kids with a history of trauma and loss, prenatal exposure to alcohol or drugs, or neurodiversity be more vulnerable to tech-related mental health challenges?
• How do issues like attachment, identity, and resilience intersect with device use?
• Are there specific risks associated with online relationships, gaming communities, or social media for these children?
• What can adoptive and foster parents, as well as caregivers such as grandparents raising their grandchildren, do proactively to reduce some of these risks before problems arise?
• What role do boundaries, monitoring, and co-viewing/co-playing have in prevention?
• How can they help their child develop self-protective, self-regulation skills, such as learning to prioritize their own mental health and manage their device use?
• If a tween or teen has already had a harmful tech-related experience, what steps should parents/caregivers take immediately?
• What does a healthy “tech culture” in a home look like for tweens and teens?
• One piece of equipping and empowering advice for leading with purpose and mission around the issues of technology, devices, and tweens’ and teens’ mental health

RESOURCES:

• Managing Technology and Screens
• What Resource Parents Should Know About Prenatal Exposure
• How to Cu

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Question: I have resentment against my (soon-to-be adopted) child’s mom, who is an addict. I get frustrated with his disrespect & disobedience, and bitterness & resentment rise up. He also respects my husband way more than me. I am trying so hard not to let it show or to take it out on him. I need help!

Resources:

• Parenting Children with Challenging Behaviors
• Prenatal Exposure, Part 1: Parenting Babies through Elementary Ages
• Parenting a Challenging Child: A Collaborative Approach

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Do you dread the teen years? Or, if you're in the midst of parenting teens, do you struggle to find ways to connect? This week, we interview Dr. Melody Aguayo, a parenting coach specializing in working with at-risk children and their families and the founder of Real Child Consulting, LLC. She is the mom of two adopted kids.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Parents wonder why their easy and natural connection with their kids changed, and they now feel on the outs and have to work harder. What is the developmental stage that is happening between the ages of about 13 and 18 or 19?
• Teens act like they don’t need us, when I believe they need us even more, to be present, but in a distinctly different way. I think that our emotions as a parent can sometimes interfere with connecting with teens.
• Change our expectation of what “connection” means with teens.
• Parents report feeling powerless in parenting when their kids reach their teen years. What is the essence of our power as parents?
• Our goals for our teens are to become responsible and independent. How can we parent in such a way to foster these goals?
• Let’s address some common issues we face when parenting teens:
  • Arguing. How to turn an argument into a conversation?
  • Spending too much time on technology
  • Running with the wrong crowd
• Tips for connecting and building trust and appreciation with your teen!

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

I spent some time this week thinking about what I’ve learned from my experiences as an adoptive parent and the wisdom of others in our community. In reflection, I've created a list of the things I wish I knew before adopting.

Resources:

• 8 Things I Wish I Had Known Before I Adopted
• Free courses to strengthen your family
• Therapeutic Parenting: Strategies & Solutions
• Beginner’s Guide to TBRI

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Kinship-led families have unique needs, and finding resources to meet those needs can be a challenge. Today, we're talking with Mike Heath, a Resource Specialist with the Coalition for Children, Youth & Families in Wisconsin. The Coalition is a Resource Center for birth parents, foster families, adoptive families, relative/kinship/and like-kin caregivers, and child welfare and Tribal agency professionals.

In this episode, we discuss:

• What are the most frequently reported everyday needs or resource gaps caregivers are experiencing?
• What is the most pressing need these kids are facing when they come to a new caregiver?
• What are the urgent needs caregivers have when welcoming a child or a sibling group, etc?
• Where can families find help with immediate essentials—such as beds, cribs, car seats, clothing, and school supplies?
• Which phone numbers should caregivers keep on speed dial?
• How should a relative caregiver secure the ability to make medical and school decisions quickly?
• What papers or forms should caregivers request on day one? From whom?
• Managing the documentation and paperwork can be a significant challenge for a new caregiver. Do you have any recommendations for managing this?
• Should school enrollment be a priority in that first week?
• How should a caregiver start the process of ensuring medical coverage (dental, vision, prescriptions, and mental health included)?
• Where should I start if I find the Medicaid/CHIP process confusing?
• Once a kinship-led family is settling in, what additional needs or options should they consider?
• Where to go to learn about those options?
• What are the possible financial resources that caregivers should look into?
• Importance of self-care, mental wellness, and community for both caregivers and the children they support
• If a new caregiver listens to this and does only three things this week, what should they be?

Resources:

• Free Download Checklist for the first 30 days as a Kinship Caregiver
• Virtual Resource Kit for Relative Caregivers - Virtual Resource Kit: Relative Caregiving - Wisconsin Family Connections Center
• Relative Caregiver Learning Pathway on Champion Classrooms (Free recorded webinar series) - Relative Caregiver Learning Pathway Link
• Collection of Resources for Relative Caregivers - https://wifamilyconnectionscenter.org/how-do-i/find-support-as-a-relative-caregiver/
• Coalition for Children, Youth & Families -

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Click here to send us a topic idea or question for Weekend Wisdom.

Jackson TerKeurst was born in Liberia and by the age of 7 was a war orphan living in dire circumstances. So how did he end up as an entrepreneur, leader, and now author? Join us for an inspirational conversation about identity, overcoming, and redemption from Jackson's new book, The Only Way Forward is Back.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Cultural differences
• How challenges like poverty and food insecurity impacted your first experiences in the States
• How did your trauma manifest in your behavior at home?
• How did your family help heal those impacts?
• Discuss the additional unique challenges that being adopted as a teenager may have presented during your early months and years in your new family.
• Discuss how you’ve worked on answering "Who Am I?" across the chapters of your life?
• What were the helpful or healing experiences that went into pulling all those parts of your identity together to create today’s Jackson TerKuerst, husband, father, son, brother, entrepreneur, and now author?
• What would you say to parents or caregivers who are in the thick of it right now, walking with a child who is struggling to figure out who they are and where they belong?

Support the show

Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.

Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

• Weekly podcasts
• Weekly articles/blog posts
• Resource pages on all aspects of family building