If the year didn’t start gently — if January arrived with tension, grief, or exhaustion instead of clarity — this episode is for you. Kelley offers a softer, more honest way to begin the year: not by conquering it or hardening yourself, but by holding it with both hands. Through a nervous-system-informed lens, she explores why overwhelm and numbness make sense right now, how joy supports regulation rather than avoidance, and how Black women can move forward without abandoning their bodies or humanity in the process.

1. You don’t need to conquer the year — you can hold it.

The pressure to dominate or “win” the year keeps the body braced. Holding the year allows for flexibility, honesty, and care as life unfolds.

2. Overwhelm or numbness is a nervous system response, not a failure.

What many people are experiencing is flooding — the body protecting itself from too much stress and information at once. The work is learning how to return to your body, not push past it.

3. Joy is practical, ancestral, and regulating.

Joy isn’t denial or indulgence — it’s a way the nervous system receives new information. For Black women, joy is inherited, communal, and a companion to grief, not an escape from it.

(Key moments to revisit)

• 00:01:06 – 00:02:33
• Why starting the year tense or guarded makes sense — and why January isn’t a clean reset.
• 00:02:11 – 00:03:28
• What nervous system flooding is and how it shows up as anxiety or emotional shutdown.
• 00:06:35 – 00:07:52
• The difference between gripping the year and holding it — and how your body can guide decisions.
• 00:08:18 – 00:10:07
• Joy as ancestral practice and nervous system regulation, not toxic positivity.

As you move through the coming week, pause and ask yourself:

Where am I gripping my life too tightly right now — and what would it feel like to soften my hands just a little?

Notice what your body needs before deciding what the year should look like. Even one small moment of pleasure, rest, or beauty can remind your nervous system that danger isn’t the only thing happening. Heartache and hope can live in the same body.

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@blackgirlburnout

Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com

Watch the episode on YouTube

Drop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.

Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.

Become a paid Substack subscriber ($5/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.

Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.com

Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/

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Five years into Black Girl Burnout, this season premiere serves as a manifesto and recommitment to living fully without self-abandonment. Kelley reframes burnout as more than a work issue, challenges the lie that success requires suffering, and invites listeners to build lives rooted in softness, ambition, and sustainability—without disappearing, shrinking, or betraying themselves.

• You can be ambitious without being violent to yourself.
• Healing does not require disappearing from your life.
• Soft living is not weakness or laziness—it’s discernment.
• A meaningful life does not have to cost you your body, joy, or peace.

• 00:00–01:30 — We’re back: reflecting on five years of Black Girl Burnout and a renewed sense of clarity and purpose
• 05:00–06:30 — “We don’t want to opt out of life—we want to opt out of harm”
• 11:45–13:10 — What living softly actually means (and what it doesn’t)
• 18:30–20:00 — Why you don’t have to abandon yourself to heal, succeed, or live well

As you move through your week, notice where you may be pushing, forcing, or overriding yourself out of habit. Ask gently: Is this supporting me—or costing me myself? Let this episode be permission to choose a rhythm that allows you to stay present in your life while still moving toward what matters to you.

Like, share, and subscribe on all platforms, and find us on social media

@blackgirlburnout

Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com

Watch the episode on YouTube

Drop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.

Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.

Become a paid Substack subscriber ($5/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.

Check out PharmaNutra and use my code BGB for a great deal: https://pharmanutra-us.com

Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/

Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle

Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle

In this manifesto-style year-end episode, Kelley closes out 2025 by naming the new foundation of Black Girl Burnout: five gentle “commandments” designed to help Black women opt out of struggle and choose softness, joy, and liberation. Reflecting on a year of global change, personal evolution, and collective exhaustion, she reframes rest, ease, joy, softness, and freedom from unnecessary pain as non-negotiable truths—not rewards. This episode sets the tone for 2026 and introduces the four pillars guiding the podcast forward: soft life liberation, practical healing for real life, joy and creative living, and sustainable money, work, and productivity without burnout.

• Rest is not a reward—it is the first response and a necessary foundation for clarity, creativity, and survival.
• Ease and excellence are not opposites; joy- and ease-led living creates more sustainable success.
• Joy is not frivolous—it is data that helps guide decisions, boundaries, and aligned living.
• You are allowed to choose a life that does not hurt, even if no one around you ever has.

• 00:02:44 – Introducing the Black Girl Burnout Commandments and why this moment calls for a new foundation
• 00:05:10 – Commandment #1: Rest as the first response, not the last resort
• 00:06:30 – Commandment #2: Why ease is not the enemy of excellence
• 00:08:09 – Commandment #3: Joy as a powerful and necessary data point
• 00:13:00 – Commandment #5: Choosing a life that does not hurt—and opting out of inherited struggle

If this episode resonated, choose just one commandment to carry with you into 2026. Let it be a quiet anchor rather than a checklist. And if you want to go deeper, you’re invited to join Kelley on Substack for monthly workshops and Q&A—designed with joy, ease, and sustainability at the center.

Like, share, and subscribe on all platforms, and find us on social media

@blackgirlburnout

Subscribe to our newsletter: blackgirlburnout.com

Watch the episode on YouTube

Drop a review—help us spread the word that rest is not weakness.

Join our Substack family for weekly reflections, tools, and behind-the-scenes notes from Kelley.

Become a paid Substack subscriber ($5/month—the cost of a latte!) for exclusive resources to support your burnout-free life.

Check out Pharmanutra: pharmanutra-us.com

Savvy Ladies: https://www.savvyladies.org/

Advertising Inquiries: RedCircle

Privacy & Opt-Out: RedCircle