"My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world."
"I don't think he should have narrated the book..."
Whether they conducted their research in life or in the lab, experts Tucker Max and Dr. Geoffrey Miller have spent the last 20-plus years learning what women really want from their men, why they want it, and how men can deliver those qualities.
"Essential Reading for any man!!"
What do you do after you write a #1 best-selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures that makes you rich and famous? Celebrate by getting more drunk and having insane amounts of sex, obviously. And pretty soon you've got another f-ing book on your hands. Stuffed full of ridiculous stories of bad decisions, debauchery, and sexual recklessness, Assholes Finish First starts where I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell left off, then proceeds to "some next-level shit."
"Tucker learned to read."
Here's Tucker Max's third and final book in his series of stories about his drunken debauchery and ridiculous antics. What began as a simple sentence on an obscure website, "My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole," and developed into two infamously genre-defining books, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell and Assholes Finish First, ends here.
As a thank you to those who have loved the stories and supported him for so long, Tucker has gone back through his massive archive of material one last time, culled out what you might call the "best of the rest" and arranged it here, in Sloppy Seconds, like an audiobook version of deleted scenes. Unlike most deleted scenes, however, these don't suck. So enjoy.
Ich heiße Tucker Max und bin ein Arschloch. Ich betrinke mich bei unpassenden Gelegenheiten bis zum Exzess, scheiße auf gesellschaftliche Normen, pflege jeder meiner Marotten, ignoriere die Folgen meines Handelns, verarsche Idioten und Wichtigtuer, schlafe mit mehr Frauen als die Vernunft es zulässt, und verhalte mich stets wie ein verrückt gewordener Schwachkopf. Aber ich leiste auf eine sehr wichtige Art und Weise doch meinen Beitrag zum Wohle der Menschheit: ich teile meine Abenteuer mit dem Rest der Welt...