America’s 911 system is supposed to be for emergencies only. But some people apparently didn’t get the memo, because the following are some of their responses when asked by dispatchers, “What’s your emergency?”, “Yeah, I want to order a pizza.”, “I’ve been standing all day and my feet hurt.”, “I just swallowed a penny. Am I going to die?”, “I want an officer to come out and take care of a low-flying aircraft.”,“When does the Burger King open?”
Sex. It’s something that’s on everyone’s mind. But the minds that thought of the weird, strange, and stupid sex acts that are reported in Fifty Shades of Dumb: True Stories of Strange and Screwy Sex are a breed of their own - and unfortunately some of them try to breed on their own.
"Being Dumb or Dumber is not an achievement"
Straight from police blotters across the country, The Stupid Crook Book chronicles idiotic criminals and their foiled attempts to turn a quick buck or cause general mischief. In this hilarious volume, witness stories about dopey crooks such as: A former convict robs a bar to get cash to feed his drug habit. Unfortunately, he lives above the bar in question, and the victim of his crime - his landlord! A man is stopped for speeding in Oklahoma and pleads with the officer not to give him a ticket, IF he finds drugs in the car.