Nine years of living with dying and raising three teens while working dawn to dusk. Slowly, I eased through it. Slowly, I developed a realization of my priorities, who I was, and where I belong. A world where handshakes are meaningless, love is a memory tear sliding down my cheek and death has become too-close of a companion. How could I keep going? Bird feathers, dolphins, a moon that brought me up short-these were the symbols that showed me the way. And gradually I attained a family, my family filled with love.