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You Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News
- Shocking but Utterly True Facts
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
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Publisher's summary
You're going to wish you never got this audiobook. Some facts are too terrifying to teach in school. Unfortunately, Cracked.com is more than happy to fill you in: A zombie apocalypse? It could happen. 50% of humans are infected with a parasite that can take over your brain. The FDA wouldn't let you eat bugs, right? Actually, you might want to put down those jelly beans. And that apple. And that strawberry yogurt. Think dolphins are our friends? Then these sex-crazed thrill killers of the sea have you right where they want you. The most important discovery in the history of genetics? Francis Crick came up with it while on LSD. Think you're going to choose whether or not to buy this audiobook? Scientists say your brain secretly makes all your decisions 10 seconds before you even know what they are.
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Jeanne Marie Laskas first met the young forensic pathologist Dr. Bennet Omalu in 2009, while reporting a story for GQ that would go on to inspire the movie Concussion. Omalu told her about a day in September 2002, when, in a dingy morgue in downtown Pittsburgh, he picked up a scalpel and made a discovery that would rattle America in ways he’d never intended. Omalu was new to America, chasing the dream, a deeply spiritual man escaping the wounds of civil war in Nigeria.
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If you know, come forth and speak.
- By Cynthia on 12-14-15
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There's Nothing in This Book That I Meant to Say
- By: Paula Poundstone
- Narrated by: Paula Poundstone
- Length: 5 hrs and 59 mins
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What do the lives of Lincoln, Helen Keller, Joan of Arc, and other historical figures have in common with Paula Poundstone? In the hands of this wryly observant and self-deprecating comedian, the answer is outrageously funny and unexpectedly touching. Poundstone compares her crazy life to theirs, as she holds forth on her children, her career, and the time in her life when it appeared she would lose them both.
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More!
- By Evelyn on 02-11-07
By: Paula Poundstone
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The Great Gasbag
- An A-Z Study Guide to Surviving Trump World
- By: Joy Behar
- Narrated by: Joy Behar
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Put down the knife, lock away the gun, lay aside the noose - Joy Behar is here to save you from suicide as she hot walks you through the next four years (two if we are lucky, less if liberal dreams come true). Besides despair, the sane response to the insanity in the White House is laughter. On her hit ABC daytime show The View, Joy has been blunt in her condemnation of the comb over-in-chief, and her words have electrified and inspired millions in the resistance for whom #notmypresident has become a rallying cry.
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Funny and Smart !
- By MM on 10-29-17
By: Joy Behar
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Tomorrowland
- Our Journey From Science Fiction to Science Fact
- By: Steven Kotler
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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New York Times, Wired, Atlantic Monthly, Discover bestselling author Steven Kotler has written extensively about those pivotal moments when science fiction became science fact...and fundamentally reshaped the world. Now he gathers the best of his best, updated and expanded upon, to guide listeners on a mind-bending tour of the far frontier, and how these advances are radically transforming our lives.
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Covers a lot of different topics in many industries
- By ErnieA on 06-27-15
By: Steven Kotler
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The Goliath Stone
- By: Larry Niven, Matthew Joseph Harrington
- Narrated by: Jeff Woodman
- Length: 6 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Doctor Toby Glyer has effected miracle cures with the use of nanotechnology. But Glyer’s controversial nanites are more than just the latest technological advance, they are a new form of life - and they have more uses than just medical. Glyer’s nanites also have the potential to make everyone on Earth rich from the wealth of asteroids.
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Boring, unbelievable nano junk!
- By GH on 06-27-13
By: Larry Niven, and others
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Galapagos
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Galapagos takes the listener back one million years to AD 1986. A simple vacation cruise suddenly becomes an evolutionary journey. Thanks to an apocalypse, a small group of survivors stranded on the Galapagos Islands are about to become the progenitors of a brave, new, totally different human race. Kurt Vonnegut, America's master satirist, looks at our world and shows us all that is sadly, madly awry - and all that is worth saving.
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The survival of the human race is a total bore!
- By Darwin8u on 12-13-16
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Expanded Universe, Vol. 2
- By: Robert A. Heinlein
- Narrated by: Bronson Pinchot
- Length: 9 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Robert A. Heinlein has been hailed as one of the most forward-thinking science fiction writers of all time, and Expanded Universe (presented in two volumes) offers the perfect collection of his works to provide listeners with true insights into his uniquely creative mind.
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I Nostradamus type warning for today
- By mort on 06-26-18
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Zealot
- A Book About Cults
- By: Jo Thornely
- Narrated by: Jo Thornely
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Why would anyone join a cult? Maybe they're unhappy with their current religion, or they want to change the world, or they're disappointed with their lives and want to find something bigger or holier that makes sense of this confusing, chaotic and dangerous world. Or maybe they just want to give themselves the best possible chance of having sex with aliens. Whatever the reason, once people are in, it's usually very difficult for them to leave.
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Good I'm formation.
- By sarah crandall on 03-12-19
By: Jo Thornely
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Everything Is Awful
- And Other Observations
- By: Matt Bellassai
- Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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From the break-out star of BuzzFeed and the People's Choice Award-winning comedian comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful moments from his life so far, the humiliations of being an adult, and other little indignities. Matt Bellassai has no idea what he's doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially-acceptable - nay - professional alcoholic. He's got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess.
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Best Audio Book I’ve heard ever.
- By M on 11-23-17
By: Matt Bellassai
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Rick Mercer Final Report
- By: Rick Mercer
- Narrated by: Rick Mercer
- Length: 6 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Rick Mercer can always be relied on to provoke a strong reaction - but what he said one fall day in 2017 truly shocked Canada. In a rant posted on social media, the great Canadian satirist announced loud and clear that the 15th season of the Rick Mercer Report - the nation's best-watched and best-loved comedy show - would be the last. This volume brings together never-before-published rants from the last five seasons of the show, plus a selection of the very best rants from earlier years.
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Mercer Hits It Out Of The Ballpark
- By Wade Lancaster on 11-11-19
By: Rick Mercer
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Seven Deadly Sins
- Settling the Argument Between Born Bad and Damaged Good
- By: Corey Taylor
- Narrated by: Corey Taylor
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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For the first time, Slipknot and Stone Sour frontman Corey Taylor speaks directly to his fans and shares his worldview about life as a sinner. And Taylor knows how to sin. As a small-town hero in the early '90s, he threw himself into a fierce-drinking, drug-abusing, hard-loving, live-for-the-moment life. Soon Taylor's music exploded, and he found himself rich, wanted, and on the road. His new and ever-more-extreme lifestyle had an unexpected effect, however; for the first time, he began to actively think about what it meant to sin.
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Glad I didn't read this before buying concert tix
- By S. Adams on 07-23-19
By: Corey Taylor
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Ask a Historian
- 50 Surprising Answers to Things You Always Wanted to Know
- By: Greg Jenner
- Narrated by: Dan Schreiber, Greg Jenner, Janina Ramirez, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Responding to fifty genuine questions from the public, Greg Jenner takes you on an entertaining tour through history from the Stone Age to the Swinging Sixties, revealing the best and most surprising stories, facts and historical characters from the past. From ancient joke books, African empires and the invention of meringues, to mummies, mirrors and menstrual pads—Ask A Historian is a deliciously amusing and informative smorgasbord of historical curiosities.
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best bonus content ever!
- By Matthew K Wendelken on 03-24-22
By: Greg Jenner
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Explore the world of names: What is something that literally everything in existence has in common? It all has a name! With this audiobook, you can learn the origins of these names. From countries and cities to toys and animals to even planets, learn the etymology of interesting words in a fun and entertaining way. Learn new things: Why is New York called New York? Name Explain has the answer for you.
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How does soap know what's dirt? How do magnets work? Why do ice cubes crackle in your glass? And how can you keep them quiet? These are questions that torment us all. Now Robert L. Wolke, professor emeritus of chemistry at the University of Pittsburgh, provides definitive - and amazingly simple - explanations for the mysteries of everyday life.
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From memorable disasters such as New Coke, the XFL, and Tiger Woods’ marriage to less-remembered failures such as Yugo, Cop Rock, and Microsoft’s BOB, Worst Ideas Ever revisits history’s biggest blunders. Whether it’s a pop culture failure or a political one, Worst Ideas Ever uncovers the ridiculous stories behind mistakes so huge, you’ll have to constantly remind yourself that they actually happened.
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Unleash your inner Einstein with the most exhiliarating, laugh-out-loud trivia book ever written! Be catapulted on a whirlwind adventure through the zany, weird, and utterly fascinating realms of knowledge, as we take trivia to a whole new level of fun! Packed with 1,522 mind-blowing facts spanning science, history, pop culture, and more, this rip-roaring, side-splitting tome is perfect for trivia buffs and inquisitive minds of all stripes, comprising everything from the astonishing to the absurd, the hilarious to the hair-raising, and everything in between. "Brain-Boosting Facts for ...
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WARNING: This book will transform you into the ultimate cool-cat in ANY crowd! Ever wondered about why cats seem irresistibly drawn to laser pointers? Or the mystery behind cats' uncanny ability to sense their owner's emotions? (HINT: It's NOT because they're psychic) Look up, cat lovers! Get ready to pounce on a whisker-twitching adventure with "Interesting Facts for Curious Cats"! Prepare To Uncover: The scientific curiosity behind a cat's love for chasing laser dots The historical tale of cats' sacred status in Ancient Egypt The intriguing fact that cats have a unique 'language' they use...
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The Book of Common Fallacies
- Falsehoods, Misconceptions, Flawed Facts, and Half-Truths That Are Ruining Your Life
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Everything you thought you knew was wrong! Long before Snopes.com and Wikipedia, The Book of Common Fallacies set out to debunk popular beliefs and set the record straight. By tracking down the facts and citing experts in a multitude of fields, Philip Ward points out the senseless ideas that we have come to accept as fact. Newly updated with today’s common misconceptions, The Book of Common Fallacies exposes the truth behind hundreds of commonly held false beliefs.
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A few good entries, but most are obscure
- By Dana on 06-10-16
By: Phillip Ward, and others
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A Million Years in a Day
- A Curious History of Everyday Life from the Stone Age to the Phone Age
- By: Greg Jenner
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Who invented beds? When did we start cleaning our teeth? How old are wine and beer? Which came first: the toilet seat or toilet paper? What was the first clock? Every day, from the moment our alarm clock wakes us in the morning until our head hits our pillow at night, we all take part in rituals that are millennia old. Structured around one ordinary day, A Million Years in a Day reveals the astonishing origins and development of the daily practices we take for granted.
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Super interesting!
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What listeners say about You Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Kathleen Smith-Bernat
- 11-08-14
Don't let the title fool you
Where does You Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
It is right up there. Kept my interest and was entertaining
What did you like best about this story?
Learning fascinating facts about things you thought were true only to learn history is not always the way it seems.
Which scene was your favorite?
Nothing sticks out, enjoyed everything
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
Yes it made me laugh
Any additional comments?
A fun book about history figures and events that are totally different from what I have heard or read. Just goes to show not everything is the way history books would have you believe.
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- Jeffery Yelton
- 02-22-16
entertaining!
worth multiple listens.
funny as well as educational. a definite recommendation to all who enjoy off the wall trivia.
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- B. Grierson
- 08-03-15
Hilarious
While mostly just a collection of already printed Cracked.com articles, it's wonderfully hilarious to listen to while on a drive. At first, I wasn't thrilled with the narrator, but he grew on me and the more I listened, the more I realized he was perfect for the position.
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- Nina Tassin
- 03-25-15
One of the best books I have ever read.
I love this type of book but there are so few. I found this book to be interesting and I never lost interest in other words I found all of the chapters interesting.
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Overall
- Randall
- 12-30-17
Asd
Very funny great book idea i do not have anything else to write why 14 words
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- Tony E.
- 02-03-16
When you need Cracked.com articles in your ear
Where does You Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
It is pretty funny and engaging. It is articles from Cracked.com thrown into a book. I'm glad I got it as the deal of the day because while I found it funny and engaging, if I would have paid full price for it, I would have second thoughts. I usually like browsing the cracked articles but this can be a bit overwhelming if you aren't careful.
Which scene was your favorite?
The baddest, most awesome presidents of the United States was a good article.
Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?
I probably could but would not retain much after.
Any additional comments?
It's a good listen for mindless entertainment.
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- Linda
- 11-02-23
Laughed out loud!
I couldn’t stop listening to this book! I wish that I hadn’t heard it do that I could listen again! Loved it❤️
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- Trudy L. Soura
- 10-02-14
Im dying here,this needs to be twice as long !!!!
The funniest thing ive heard ! You really have to hear it.Its funnier then George Carlin !
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13 people found this helpful
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- Dale
- 01-29-16
Funny
Good to the last story. Easy listening. plus very funny. Well worth the your time.
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- rob
- 04-13-15
A terrific listen from. beginning to end!
A terrific listen that you hope will not end. I'm on a 3rd or 4th llisten.. The storyline and narration are first class throughout the book. I'm hoping for a sequel.
Get this one - you won't be sorry.
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