• Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married

  • By: Gary Chapman
  • Narrated by: Chris Fabry
  • Length: 3 hrs and 44 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (1,076 ratings)

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Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married  By  cover art

Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married

By: Gary Chapman
Narrated by: Chris Fabry
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Publisher's summary

Before you plan your wedding, plan your marriage! Wish you could know what you’re getting into when you say “I do”? Now, with Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married, you can. Dr. Gary Chapman, #1 New York Times best-selling author of The 5 Love Languages™, has spent the last thirty-five years counseling couples. In Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married, he shares what he and these couples have learned from experience. Among the twelve things you should know: that being in love is not enough to make a successful marriage, that romantic love has two stages (and how to make the transition), that mutual sexual fulfillment is not automatic, and that personality profoundly affects behavior. The stakes on marriage are high, but the rewards of preparing are even higher. Whether you’re single or dating, this audio can be your relationship blueprint and help you decide if and when you’re ready to tie the knot. If you’re engaged, even recently married, it will help you examine your relationship foundation and learn the skills necessary for building a successful marriage. Things I Wish I’d Known Before We Got Married was written to help you realize your goal of marital happiness. But don’t just listen to it - experience it. Grapple with the practical tips and ideas discussed, honestly share your thoughts and feelings, respect each other’s opinions, and find workable solutions to your differences. The more you do so, says Chapman, the more you will be prepared for marriage.

©2010 Oasis Audio; 2010 Gary Chapman

What listeners say about Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married

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Useful and Practical!

What made the experience of listening to Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married the most enjoyable?

It contains real-life issues and real-life experiences. I'll listen over and over again.

What’s an idea from the book that you will remember?

1. That being in love is not an adequate foundation for building a successful marriage

2. That romantic love has two stages

3. The saying: "Like mother, like daughter" and "Like father, like son" is not myth

4. That forgiveness is not a feeling

5. That toilets are not self-cleaning

6. That we needed a plan for handling our money

7. That mutual sexual fulfillment is not automatic

8. That I was marrying into a family

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19 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars

Useful only for the most sheltered

This book assumes three things about you: 1) that you are so inexperienced and naive about relationships, that you aren't aware that euphoric infatuation doesn't last forever, you haven't had sex with your partner, and you are oblivious to your parnter's true personality and habits; 2) that you have never lived on your own and are oblivious to the basics of paying bills and cleaning a house; and 3) that you are Christian and are willing to accept answers like "turn to God to resolve conflicts" as legitimate solutions.

If you don't qualify the above, this book is rudimentary at best, and had little to say that simple experience of being in a few relationships hadn't already taught me. It also seems to skip over important issues like how much together time to ask of your partner when you live together. I'd return it if I could.

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13 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars

I wish I knew

I wish I'd know these things while dating before I got married. This would have changed the course of many relationships!!! I would have been equipped to successfully be able to deal with such a serious commitment! Trust me singles when I say, "don't take this information lightly or for granted. You will be so much further along in your relationship so it can be a successful one or prevent you from being in an unsuccessful one. YOU WILL ALWAYS NEED TO LEARN. This book is good for married couples to review who have had no training!!! Like the majority of those I know. People get married and just go day by day. They don't enjoy their marriage to the fullest by building it up. What a waist! I'm sure that the keys topics that are touched here have a great amount to do about it. I know it did for me. It's not enough to just be married. We are still alive so it's not too late. Equipping your marriage to be successful is PRICELESS! Great book for singles to prepare, engaged to equip and married couples to review and reconstruct some damaged or undeveloped areas. God bless you for an awesome tool, each chapter is like a little teaser!

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12 people found this helpful

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Must read for singles, dating and married couples

I found the book very enlightening and I am 100 percent certain that you will learn something. I liked the book so much that I am going to purchase the actual book. This book is worth every penny and should be read by singles as well as dating and married couples. I hope you enjoy and learn as much as I did.

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4 people found this helpful

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So glad I read it.

I'm in a serious dating relationship, not yet married. We're thinking of engagement and I think this book helped us iron out a lot of our reservations with regards to marriage or readiness for marriage. Highly recommend it!

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4 people found this helpful

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Fantastic Book

Although I had listened to the book after I was married, I found the book very enlightening. My favorite part was the five love languages. I recommend that everyone reads his book to have a clue on relationships.

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3 people found this helpful

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Best Marriage Advice Book

I have read quite a few marriage prep books and this book had the most real life advice not just the fluffy or the in theory stuff. My fiance and I talked a lot after each chapter. I definitely recommend it!

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    5 out of 5 stars

Awesome!!!

This is a must read book, even if you are not getting married anytime soon. Everybody that believes will get married in the future will benefit greatly by appying the concepts of this book. It's great! I was so hooked I read it in one day!

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Some Common Sense, Some I Never Thought About

Would you listen to Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married again? Why?

I do plan to listed to this again, I think that by listening to it again, I will get even more out of the book

What did you like best about this story?

I think what I like best about it is going back into the early married life, the stories he shared and the lessons learned. It was a mix of humor and stories told.

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Things I Wish I'd Known Before We Got Married?

Not to take everything so seriously, talk about things/issues before they fester.

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    3 out of 5 stars
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More for younger, Christian couples.

I don't fall into the demographic I think this book is for, but I did find a couple of his points useful - particular regarding finances. I wish he had gone more in that direction. Most of his points can be solved with good communication and living together before the marriage to make sure you're compatible. i know that goes against the Christian narrative, but it might be a nice move considering the enormity of the decision.

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