I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t)

Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power

By: Brené Brown

Narrated by: Lauren Fortgang

Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins

Publisher's summary

The quest for perfection is exhausting and unrelenting. We spend too much precious time and energy managing perception and creating carefully edited versions of ourselves to show to the world. As hard as we try, we can't seem to turn off the tapes that fill our heads with messages like, Never good enough! and What will people think?

Why? What fuels this unattainable need to look like we always have it all together? At first glance, we might think its because we admire perfection, but that's not the case. We are actually the most attracted to people we consider to be authentic and down-to-earth. We love people who are real; we're drawn to those who both embrace their imperfections and radiate self-acceptance.

There is a constant barrage of social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. Everywhere we turn, there are messages that tell us who, what, and how were supposed to be. So, we learn to hide our struggles and protect ourselves from shame, judgment, criticism, and blame by seeking safety in pretending and perfection.

Based on seven years of ground-breaking research and hundreds of interviews, I Thought It Was Just Me shines a long-overdue light on an important truth: Our imperfections are what connect us to each other and to our humanity. Our vulnerabilities are not weaknesses; they are powerful reminders to keep our hearts and minds open to the reality that we're all in this together.

As Dr. Brown writes, "We need our lives back. It's time to reclaim the gifts of imperfection - the courage to be real, the compassion we need to love ourselves and others, and the connection that gives true purpose and meaning to life. These are the gifts that bring love, laughter, gratitude, empathy and joy into our lives."

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2007 Brené Brown (P)2010 Audible, Inc.

Critic reviews

"Brené Brown’s ability to explore shame and resilience with humor, vulnerability and honesty is both uplifting and liberating. If we want to change our lives, our relationships or even the world, we must start by understanding and overcoming the shame that keeps us silent. This important and hopeful book offers a bold new perspective on the power of telling our stories." (Professor Jody Williams, 1997 Nobel Peace Prize Recipient; Campaign Ambassador, International Campaign to Ban Landmines)

"Grounded in exceptional scholarship and filled with inspiring stories, this is one of those rare books that has the potential to turn lives around." (Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., author of The Dance of Anger)

" I Thought It Was Just Me can be a doorway to freedom and self-esteem for many, many readers. (Martha Beck, Ph.D., columnist, O, The Oprah Magazine, and author of Finding Your Own North Star)

Great book and author. Bad title.

This is an excellent book by Brené. It's real and not afraid to tell the truth about feelings of inadequacy, and how shame affects our lives. It brought to life a lot of things that I realized I am a part of, either on the giving or receiving end. My one criticize is that the book is highly skewed towards females, and nearly all the experiences, personal accounts, and examples are female centered. I don't have a problem with this, but it would have been really nice to hear more about the experiences of male shame too, since they are fundamentally different in context. Maybe the book should have been titled: "I Thought It Was Just Me - Telling the Truth About Female Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power". Small criticism of an excellent book.

Grow Grow Grow

Another great book to read to develop the skill of living in this world to the best of our ability.

This information is so vital in this day and age.

We, as a society, have become so separated and callous toward each other and toward our children that we no longer know how to interact with one another let alone ourselves. Cultivating a heart of compassion is the door we all need to walk through and understanding shame is one key to that door.

Amazing Information!

Brene Brown's work always helps me to better understand myself. Why I feel, think and do some of the things I do! Shame is a tough thing to talk about and listen to, but so important for growth.

good to know

I liked what brene had to say about shame and now understand more about how it impacts my daily life.

I truly thought it was just me!

I pride myself on being a reasonably self-aware individual, and thus have a pretty good grasp on the myriad ways that ADHD affects my being. Nonetheless, this book opened my eyes to some of the more comprehensive ways in which the disease has affected my function and self-image since I was very young. It left me feeling both empowered and validated. I cannot recommend enough to anyone that struggles with this frustrating disease!

Great Book, Struggled With The Narrator

Since this book focuses a lot on women's issues, I didn't think it would really be for me. There's a lot of knowledge to be gained though, regardless of gender. The title of the book most certainly applies.

The narrator is fantastic at conveying the lessons, but I need more reciprocity in a speaking voice for topics that get more personal and specific. This book touches on a lot of sensitive and potentially triggering things, and the almost unwavering stillness of her voice was a bit off-putting for the topics presented.

Narration

Book is awesome but would have been so much better if Brene narrated it herself.

POWERFUL!!!

It's my first audiobook of Brenê Brown that I listen to and BOY I'm on a journey now... listen to her ENTIRE collection! This book was magnificent! As a woman, I have felt so many of these examples and yes, I though it was just me. I thought surely something must be wrong with ME, for feeling this way. I now see we're an entire group who is just trying their best and simply isn't equipped with the right vocabulary to express and DEFEND ourselves. This book is a MUST READ for every woman, no matter the age, race or walk of life!!!

Priceless Insight and Wisdom

This book helped me to be more accepting of myself. My daughter felt the same. We both were able to recognize mindsets that we had been caught up in without realizing it. We were also able to choose differently because of the wisdom provided in this book. Thank you Brené!!