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Dad Is Fat
- Narrated by: Jim Gaffigan
- Length: 5 hrs and 26 mins
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Dad Is Fat
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Publisher's summary
In Dad is Fat, stand-up comedian Jim Gaffigan, who’s best known for his legendary riffs on Hot Pockets, bacon, manatees, and McDonald's, expresses all the joys and horrors of life with five young children - everything from cousins ("celebrities for little kids") to toddlers’ communication skills ("they always sound like they have traveled by horseback for hours to deliver important news"), to the eating habits of four-year-olds ("there is no difference between a four-year-old eating a taco and throwing a taco on the floor"). Dad is Fat is sharply observed, explosively funny, and a cry for help from a man who has realized he and his wife are outnumbered in their own home.
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You’re A Parent Now...Don't Mess It Up
- By Tim on 04-16-15
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself
- Tales from a Happy Life Without Kids
- By: Jen Kirkman
- Narrated by: Jen Kirkman
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 536
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 485
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 486
"You'll change your mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman - and countless women like her - when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Funny. Not fall down laughing funny, but funny
- By david on 05-22-13
By: Jen Kirkman
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My Inappropriate Life
- Some Material Not Suitable for Small Children, Nuns, or Mature Adults
- By: Heather McDonald
- Narrated by: Heather McDonald
- Length: 5 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 333
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 293
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 294
In her hilarious New York Times best seller You’ll Never Blue Ball in This Town Again, Heather McDonald recounted her adventures as an unwilling virgin in Hollywood. Now happily married with three wonderful kids, she shows that life as a grown-up - even a pretend grown-up - has its challenges. Heather’s a working mom with parents who live next door, a sister who keeps asking for one of her still-fertile eggs, and friends who are up to more hijinks than even Heather can handle.
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1 out of 5 stars
-
Irritating
- By TrishS on 04-23-13
By: Heather McDonald
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#IMomSoHard
- By: Kristin Hensley, Jen Smedley
- Narrated by: Kristin Hensley, Jen Smedley
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 1,800
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,576
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,564
In their highly anticipated first audiobook, the hilarious mom duo with millions of followers explores all the ridiculous shit you’re expected to do to keep multiple humans alive and happy-ish and celebrates the love for the friends who get you through it.
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5 out of 5 stars
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IRelateSoHard
- By Peekablue on 04-20-19
By: Kristin Hensley, and others
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Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay
- And Other Things I Had to Learn as a New Mom
- By: Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
- Narrated by: Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
- Length: 5 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 79
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 69
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Story4 out of 5 stars 68
In busy-mom-friendly short essays, Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay delivers the empathetic straight dirt on parenting, tackling everything from Mommy & Me classes ("Your baby doesn't need to be making friends at three months old - you do! But not with people you'll meet at Mommy & Me") to attachment parenting ("If you're holding your baby 24/7, that's not a baby, that's a tumor").
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3 out of 5 stars
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Ok, nothing amazing
- By Lklns on 03-14-19
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If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother
- By: Julia Sweeney
- Narrated by: Julia Sweeney
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 196
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 176
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 175
Since her time on Saturday Night Live, where she created the infamous androgynous character "Pat", Julia Sweeney has gone on to establish herself as a witty, captivating performer of one-woman shows, like God Said Ha!, In the Family Way, and Letting Go of God. She gave a TED talk sharing how she explained the birds and the bees to her eight-year-old daughter, Mulan, which ignited an incredible response. Now, when it comes to talking about motherhood, people want to hear what Julia has to say.
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4 out of 5 stars
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I Love Julia Sweeney
- By Lisa on 04-05-13
By: Julia Sweeney
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Instant Mom
- By: Nia Vardalos
- Narrated by: Nia Vardalos
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 224
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 201
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 201
Some families are created in different ways but are still, in every way, a family. Writer and star of My Big Fat Greek Wedding Nia Vardalos firmly believed she was supposed to be a mom, but Mother Nature and modern medicine had put her in a headlock. So she made a choice that shocked friends, family, and even herself: with only 14 hours' notice, she adopted a preschooler.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A wealth of information for those who wish to adopt
- By Michele Sutherland on 01-11-23
By: Nia Vardalos
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Laughing Without an Accent
- Adventures of an Iranian American, at Home and Abroad
- By: Firoozeh Dumas
- Narrated by: Firoozeh Dumas
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 304
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 173
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 175
In the best-selling memoir Funny in Farsi, Firoozeh Dumas recounted her adventures growing up Iranian American in Southern California. Now she again mines her rich Persian heritage in Laughing Without an Accent, sharing stories both tender and humorous on being a citizen of the world, on her well-meaning family, and on amusing cultural conundrums, all told with insights into the universality of the human condition. (Hint: It may have to do with brushing and flossing daily.)
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1 out of 5 stars
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Sigh
- By Sara on 01-29-14
By: Firoozeh Dumas
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Don't Lick the Minivan
- And Other Things I Never Thought I'd Say to My Kids
- By: Leanne Shirtliffe
- Narrated by: Trudie Kessler
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 217
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 196
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 191
As a woman used to traveling and living the high life in Bangkok, Leanne Shirtliffe recognized the constant fodder for humor while pregnant with twins in Asia's sin city. But in spite of deep-fried bug cuisine and nurses who cover newborn bassinets with plastic wrap, Shirtliffe manages to keep her babies alive for a year with help from a Coca-Cola deliveryman, several waitresses, and a bra factory. Then she and her husband return home to the isolation of North American suburbia.
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1 out of 5 stars
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I Guess You Had to Be There?
- By Sara on 09-08-14
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Hey Mom
- By: Louie Anderson
- Narrated by: Louie Anderson
- Length: 6 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 438
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 400
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 398
Louie Anderson has been channeling his beloved mom in his iconic stand-up comedy for decades - but she passed away before getting to see him reach new heights with his breakout role. Hey Mom is Louie's way of catching Ora Zella Anderson up on everything that has been going on in his life, including his continued struggles with food and family, but also how so much has changed for the better. He also has plenty of laugh-out-loud stories about his incredibly resilient mother and his 10 siblings, as well as observations on the absurdities of life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I love Louie even more now
- By Candace on 05-02-18
By: Louie Anderson
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The Longest Date
- Life as a Wife
- By: Cindy Chupack
- Narrated by: Cindy Chupack, Ian Wallach
- Length: 4 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 65
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 55
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 56
After having endured enough emotional wreckage in her search for true love to fill a book ( The New York Times bestseller The Between Boyfriends Book), two magazine columns, and five seasons of scripts for Sex and the City, Cindy Chupack finally, mercifully, at the age of thirty-nine, met the Perfect Man. The perfect companion for anyone navigating a marriage (or even just contemplating one), The Longest Date marks the welcome return of one of our most gifted and captivating comic writers.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Meh...
- By Jessica K. on 11-07-18
By: Cindy Chupack
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There's Nothing in This Book That I Meant to Say
- By: Paula Poundstone
- Narrated by: Paula Poundstone
- Length: 5 hrs and 59 mins
- Abridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 575
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 360
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 355
What do the lives of Lincoln, Helen Keller, Joan of Arc, and other historical figures have in common with Paula Poundstone? In the hands of this wryly observant and self-deprecating comedian, the answer is outrageously funny and unexpectedly touching. Poundstone compares her crazy life to theirs, as she holds forth on her children, her career, and the time in her life when it appeared she would lose them both.
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5 out of 5 stars
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More!
- By Evelyn on 02-11-07
By: Paula Poundstone
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Kiss and Tell
- By: Shannon Tweed, Jules McCarron
- Narrated by: Shannon Tweed
- Length: 3 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 351
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 286
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 281
In this long-awaited autobiography, one of the most beautiful women in the world tells her story, from growing up on a mink ranch in Newfoundland with six brothers and sisters to raising two children with a rock star in Beverly Hills. One of the most popular and best-known Playboy pin-ups ever, Shannon Tweed burst on the scene in the 80s as Playmate of the Year and Hugh Hefner's love interest. She soon became a successful actress, appearing in countless movies and television series.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Interesting listen.
- By KRG on 01-22-11
By: Shannon Tweed, and others
-
Miss Fortune
- Fresh Perspectives on Having It All from Someone Who Is Not Okay
- By: Lauren Weedman
- Narrated by: Lauren Weedman
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 44
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 41
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 40
Lauren Weedman is not okay. She's living what should be the good life in sunny Los Angeles. After a gig as a correspondent with The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, she scored parts in blockbuster movies, which led to memorable recurring roles on HBO's Hung and Looking. She had a loving husband and an adorable baby boy. In these comedic essays, she turns a piercingly observant, darkly funny lens on the ways her life is actually not okay.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Good
- By Ajules29 on 04-02-16
By: Lauren Weedman
-
The Wrong End of the Table
- A Mostly Comic Memoir of a Muslim Arab American Woman Just Trying to Fit In
- By: Ayser Salman, Reza Aslan - foreword
- Narrated by: Ayser Salman, Assaf Cohen
- Length: 7 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 44
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 33
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 32
Part memoir and part how-not-to guide, The Wrong End of the Table is everything you wanted to know about Arabs but were afraid to ask, with chapters such as “Tattoos and Other National Security Risks,” “You Can’t Blame Everything on Your Period; Sometimes You’re Going to Be a Crazy Bitch: and Other Advice from Mom,” and even an open letter to Trump. This is the story of every American outsider on a path to find themselves in a country of beautiful diversity.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Not what I was looking for
- By Amazon Customer on 09-01-22
By: Ayser Salman, and others
-
Everything Is Awful
- And Other Observations
- By: Matt Bellassai
- Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,038
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 953
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 949
From the break-out star of BuzzFeed and the People's Choice Award-winning comedian comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful moments from his life so far, the humiliations of being an adult, and other little indignities. Matt Bellassai has no idea what he's doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially-acceptable - nay - professional alcoholic. He's got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Best Audio Book I’ve heard ever.
- By M on 11-23-17
By: Matt Bellassai
-
I Just Want You to Know
- Letters to My Kids on Love, Faith, and Family
- By: Kate Gosselin
- Narrated by: Kate Gosselin
- Length: 3 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 35
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 20
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 20
In I Just Want You to Know, New York Times best-selling author Kate Gosselin continues her story of faith and family, picking up where her first book, Multiple Blessings, ended. Using excerpts and written prayers from her actual journal, Kate offers an intimate look at the heart of a mother during the three years her family transitioned from obscurity into television fame.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
This was a good book
- By lisa m schumann on 01-03-22
By: Kate Gosselin
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Before Liz Lemon, before Weekend Update, before Sarah Palin, Tina Fey was just a young girl with a dream: A recurring stress dream that she was being chased through a local airport by her middle-school gym teacher. She also had a dream that one day she would be a comedian on TV. She has seen both these dreams come true. At last, Tina Fey's story can be told. From her youthful days as a vicious nerd to her tour of duty on Saturday Night Live. Tina Fey reveals all, and proves what we've always suspected: You're no one until someone calls you bossy.
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Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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Tom Segura is known for his twisted takes and irreverent comedic voice. But after a few years of crazy tours and churning out podcasts weekly, all while parenting two young children, he desperately needs a second to himself. It’s not that he hates his friends and family — he’s not a monster — he’s just beat, which is why his son’s (ruthless) first full sentence, “I’d like to play alone, please,” has since become his mantra.
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Hot sauce is the best!
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David Spade is best known for his harsh "Hollywood Minute" sketches on SNL, his starring roles in movies like Tommy Boy and Joe Dirt, and his seven-year stint as Dennis Finch on the series Just Shoot Me. Now, with a wit as dry as the weather in his home state of Arizona, the "comic brat extraordinaire" delivers a memoir.
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Everything You Could Want in an Autobiography
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Bob Odenkirk’s career is inexplicable. And yet he will try like hell to explicate it for you. Charting a “Homeric” decades-long “odyssey” from his origins in the seedy comedy clubs of Chicago to a dramatic career full of award nominations - with a side trip into the action-man world that is baffling to all who know him - it’s almost like there are many Bob Odenkirks! But there is just one and one is plenty. Featuring humorous tangents, wild characters, and Bob’s trademark unflinching drive, Comedy Comedy Comedy Drama is a classic tale told by a determined idiot.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not great
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A humorous and rousing set of literal and figurative sojourns as well as a mission statement about comprehending, protecting, and truly experiencing the outdoors, fueled by three journeys undertaken by actor, humorist, and New York Times best-selling author Nick Offerman
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1 out of 5 stars
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By far his worst work to date.
- By Aron on 10-21-21
By: Nick Offerman
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Based on a True Story
- A Memoir
- By: Norm Macdonald
- Narrated by: Norm Macdonald, Tim O'Halloran
- Length: 7 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 8,387
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 7,441
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 7,415
When Norm Macdonald, one of the greatest stand-up comics of all time, was approached to write a celebrity memoir, he flatly refused, calling the genre “one step below instruction manuals.” Norm then promptly took a two-year hiatus from stand-up comedy to live on a farm in northern Canada. When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, “Call it anything you damn like.”
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5 out of 5 stars
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Bizarre, funny ride
- By Michael Chauvin on 09-25-16
By: Norm Macdonald
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The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
- By: Amy Schumer
- Narrated by: Amy Schumer
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 20,731
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 18,525
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 18,479
In The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo, Amy mines her past for stories about her teenage years, her family, relationships, and sex and shares the experiences that have shaped who she is - a woman with the courage to bare her soul to stand up for what she believes in, all while making us laugh. Down to earth and relatable, frank and unapologetic, Amy Schumer is one of us: She relies on her sister for advice, still hangs out with her high school pals, and continues to navigate the ever-changing boundaries in love, work, and life.
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3 out of 5 stars
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mind numbing
- By katrina on 09-17-16
By: Amy Schumer
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Born Standing Up
- A Comic's Life
- By: Steve Martin
- Narrated by: Steve Martin
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 14,669
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 12,050
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 11,978
In the mid-70s, Steve Martin exploded onto the comedy scene. By 1978 he was the biggest concert draw in the history of stand-up. In 1981 he quit forever. Born Standing Up is, in his own words, the story of "why I did stand-up and why I walked away".
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fantastic
- By Andrew on 11-30-07
By: Steve Martin
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Still Foolin' 'Em
- Where I've Been, Where I'm Going, and Where the Hell Are My Keys
- By: Billy Crystal
- Narrated by: Billy Crystal
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 5,617
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 5,045
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 5,024
Billy Crystal is 65, and he's not happy about it. With his trademark wit and heart, he outlines the absurdities and challenges that come with growing old, from insomnia to memory loss to leaving dinners with half your meal on your shirt. In humorous chapters like "Buying the Plot" and "Nodding Off," Crystal not only catalogues his physical gripes, but offers a road map to his 77 million fellow baby boomers who are arriving at this milestone age with him. He also looks back at the most powerful and memorable moments of his long and storied life.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Disarmingly Honest
- By David Shear on 09-12-13
By: Billy Crystal
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A Polaroid Guy in a Snapchat World
- By: David Spade
- Narrated by: David Spade
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 9,020
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 8,233
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 8,193
Written and performed for the Audible experience, Spade’s new comic memoir takes listeners along for the sometimes embarrassing and always hilarious ride of getting older in our fleeting “Snapchat World”.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Free on Spotify
- By RunnyEggz on 08-12-18
By: David Spade
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The Way I Heard It
- By: Mike Rowe
- Narrated by: Mike Rowe
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 9,824
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 8,678
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Story5 out of 5 stars 8,617
Emmy-award winning gadfly Mike Rowe presents a ridiculously entertaining, seriously fascinating collection of his favorite episodes from America’s number-one short-form podcast, The Way I Heard It, along with a host of memories, ruminations, and insights. It’s a delightful collection of mysteries. A mosaic. A memoir. A charming, surprising must-have. Mike Rowe’s The Way I Heard It collects 35 fascinating stories “for the curious mind with a short attention span”.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I could listen to Mike read all day. And I am!
- By Amazon Customer on 10-15-19
By: Mike Rowe
What listeners say about Dad Is Fat
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Ron
- 02-22-15
He needs to keep his day/night job.
To be honest Jim Gaffigan needs to keep his day job as a stand up comedian, or night job as the case may be. Did not find the book very well crafted, and found my way through it in entirety only when I had nothing else to listen to. A gifted comic but I found the book to be disappointing.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Heather
- 11-03-15
love jim!
Jims stand up and book have been a life saver during long road trips. the comedy keeps my husband and I laughing instead of sleeping. I love that I can listen with my kids in the room.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story3 out of 5 stars
- Mr Dangerous
- 11-29-18
Delightful...
Jim delivers a great book about fatherhood. The kids are nuts and you're trying to navigate through it. I recommend this book for a light easy read. For parents and non parents alike.
Great narration.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Kelly
- 08-05-17
Funny, Charming Fatness
If you could sum up Dad Is Fat in three words, what would they be?
Gooey, Giggling, Goodness
What was one of the most memorable moments of Dad Is Fat?
Talking about toddlers’ communication skills. I could see my son when he was little, doing exactly the same thing, regarding - they always sound like they have traveled by horseback for hours to deliver important news.
Which scene was your favorite?
Talking about going to kids parties. Hilarious!
Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?
Jim talking about food like it was a secret shame. Still funny, but we all know how easy it is to be judged over the foods we choose to eat in public.
Any additional comments?
Almost as good as Food: A Love Story
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- NicK
- 01-26-17
Very funny
I really enjoyed this. I will be ordering more by Jim. It was very entertaining.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Dan Gottfredson
- 07-11-15
Entertaining
Really enjoyed this light fun take on the highs and lows of raising children. I could relate to almost all his sketches and I am resolved to lighten up and enjoy the craziness instead of going crazy!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Peter
- 01-23-17
lighthearted observation of parenthood
lighthearted and highly amusing observation of parenthood. I'll get back to you on its accuracy if I ever become a parent.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Michelle Anderson
- 10-02-16
Hilarious!
I laughed from start to finish listening to this book! I have recommended it to several friends but I do think listening to it is probably a better experience than reading it because of the way that Jim's delivery is, hilarious! As a parent to two little kids under five years old I found his stories so incredibly relatable and laughed so much! I breezed through this book in less than a week and even though it's a short book that's still saying something because like I said, I have two little kids and I never have time for anything which means I really, really enjoyed this book and I think you will too!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Sheroldy
- 07-15-15
great book easy to follow
I've always enjoyed Jim Gaffigans comedy and I enjoyed this book just the same. in it's playful nature this book shed some light on a father's perspective on parenting. His voice brought his words to life and I definitely plan on listening to it again.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- jumana
- 12-28-17
I love Jim I'm a big fan of his standup comedy.
he is one if not the only one that can do a whole standup routine clean and you would be literally LMAO
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