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You Suck: A Love Story | [Christopher Moore]

You Suck: A Love Story

Being dead sucks. Make that being undead sucks. Literally. Just ask Thomas C. Flood. Waking up after a fantastic night unlike anything he's ever experienced, he discovers that his girlfriend, Jody, the woman of his dreams, is a vampire. And surprise! Now he's one, too.
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Publisher's Summary

"You bitch, you killed me. You suck!"

Being dead sucks. Make that being undead sucks.

Literally. Just ask Thomas C. Flood. Waking up after a fantastic night unlike anything he's ever experienced, he discovers that his girlfriend, Jody, the woman of his dreams, is a vampire. And surprise! Now he's one, too.

For some couples, the whole biting-and-blood thing would have been a deal breaker. But Tommy and Jody are in love, and they vow to work through their issues. Like how much Jody should teach Tommy about his new superpowers (and how much he needs to learn on his own). Plus there's Tommy's cute new minion, 16-year-old goth girl Abby Normal. (Well, someone has to run errands during daylight hours!)

Making the relationship work, however, is the least of Jody and Tommy's problems. Word has it that the vampire who nibbled on Jody wasn't supposed to be recruiting any new members into the club. Even worse, Tommy's erstwhile turkey-bowling pals are out to get him, at the urging of a blue-dyed Las Vegas call-girl named (duh) Blue.

And that really sucks.

Love in vein: listen to more vampire fiction.

©2007 Christopher Moore; (P)2007 HarperCollins Publishers

What the Critics Say

"A cheerfully perverse, gut-busting tale of young vampires in love....Moore writes with the jittery energy of a brilliant, charming class clown, mixing sex and gore and a potty mouth with a goofy-sweet sensibility to deliver laughs on nearly every page." (Publishers Weekly)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (2009 )
5 star
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4.3 (833 )
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4.6 (832 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Angela HERCULES, CALIFORNIA, United States 02-17-13
    Angela HERCULES, CALIFORNIA, United States 02-17-13 Member Since 2014
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "LOL, Quirky,Funny,Vamp Love Story Set in San Fran"
    Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

    I would recommend this audiobook to a friend because it's a different take on the traditional vampire love story. The characters are unusual and funny and intelligent. The backdrop of the story of San Franciso is great a main character in the book. I am from S.F. And I can tell you the descriptions of the city and the types of people in it are spot on.


    What was one of the most memorable moments of You Suck?

    Every introduction to every character in this book is hilarious and a captivating moment.


    What about Susan Bennett’s performance did you like?

    Susan Bennett's performance is superb! She has talent for creating uniquely different sounding characters that make each character a true individual. Her voice sparks one's imagination so that you can actually see the characters as if you were reading the book on your own.


    If you were to make a film of this book, what would be the tag line be?

    LOL! Quirky, Funny, Vampire Love Story! With A Bite!


    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    EDotGirl Ellicott City, MD 21043 01-16-12
    EDotGirl Ellicott City, MD 21043 01-16-12 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Wonderful Series!!"

    I read/listened to these books on very fast succession, so they kind of run together , but in the best possible way imaginable! The reader becomes her characters, and I will forever have Abby Normal's voice in my brain :) I lOved this book, and I think it's on the same caliber as the other two. A must read, if you are as in love with Mr. Moore's work as I now am...

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    scott 01-17-11
    scott 01-17-11
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Very worthy sequel"

    Very amusing, fun listen. The character of Abby Normal is a great addition to the Christopher Moore ouevre. Excellent narration.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jason Las Vegas, NV, USA 04-19-09
    Jason Las Vegas, NV, USA 04-19-09 Member Since 2010

    I was an English Lit major in college and 25 years later, I still love good books. As an attorney, I'm reading all day, so I love having the Audible folks read to me during my free time.

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "A Comic San Francisco Treat"

    I downloaded this listen in preparation for a weekend trip back to San Francisco, my adopted home town. It was perfect--a great guide around the locations and freaks that make SF the best city in our country. You Suck is even funnier than Bloodsucking Fiends because of the addition of a new character, Abby Normal, a teenage-age goth turned giddy minion. Susan Bennett's readings of Abby Normal's journal entries made me laugh out loud every time.

    I'm hoping that Christopher's next announced book, Bite Me, slated for 2010 is a part III and is also read by Susan Bennett.

    Because this is a character-driven book and the characters grow on you with exposure, I recommend reading Bloodsucking Fiends before starting on You Suck. You'll then welcome The Emporor and The Animals back rather than be annoyed by their craziness.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Henry Scalfo 03-13-09 Member Since 2008

    EnricoS

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "What a good time.."

    After finishing "Blood Sucking Fiends" LMAO, I had to download the sequel. This was book 290 for me and hands down, Susan Bennett delivered one of the best performances I have yet to hear. OMG! Her presentation of the chronicles of Abby were truly hilarious. Christopher Moore has won a new fan.
    This book screams sequel because of the three mysterious characters at the end. Lets hope there are plans to reveal their story.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Noel Hesperia, CA, USA 10-15-08
    Noel Hesperia, CA, USA 10-15-08
    HELPFUL VOTES
    3
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    "Incredible"

    This was my first Christopher Moore story, and I enjoyed the heck out of it. It is quite funny, and generally entertaining. Susan Bennett does a great job with all of the voices; they're very distinguishable, and they all have their own subtle nuances. I was hocked on Christopher Moore after this book.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Gary Toronto, Ontario, Canada 09-23-08
    Gary Toronto, Ontario, Canada 09-23-08 Member Since 2011

    Professional audio producer, interested in any story well told.

    HELPFUL VOTES
    4
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    "Vampy cheek with lots of bite"

    A little slow off the mark for people who haven't read earlier Moore, but enough perk and sass to keep you going until the fun really begins. Cohesive, peculiar characters chew up the scenery around the story's true star, the teenage Goth wannabe whose accurate angst and lifelike self-absorption is the really scary part. Stellar narration by Susan Bennett breathes life into not just the main characters but also several undead bit players. An (almost) literal deus ex machina surprise seems a plotline cop-out in an otherwise entertaining and original fang-filled chucklefest. I rate it an O-negative.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Helen Austin Texas 02-15-08
    Helen Austin Texas 02-15-08 Member Since 2007

    Reading Raven

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    "Funny and entertaining!"

    This is my second Christopher Moore audiobook and I liked this best. It was entertaining through intrigue and humor; could not ask for more. The characters were endearing, weird and interesting. Some scenes stayed in my head for days and I would laugh thinking of them. This is a follow up book for one he wrote ten years which I have not read, and it did not hamper the book. I like the visit of characters from other books ("A Dirty Job") and an extra tidbit of info on them. Absurd and wonderful, an easy entertaining listen. Narration was clear and perfect for the voices of the book. The end of the recording has a interview with the author which is a bit staged but fascinating to hear how he did his research especially for the teenage girl!

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jonathan Hoffman Portland, OR USA 10-07-07
    Jonathan Hoffman Portland, OR USA 10-07-07 Member Since 2005

    Shelterdog

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Hilarious"

    Christopher Moore isn't for everyone. Incredibly irreverent, profane, offbeat. But this is the fourth book of his I've read or listened to and I liked it the best. Part of that is due to the narrator, Susan Bennett, who absolutely does the best narration I've heard on any book. When she starts reading Moore's character "Abbie Normal," th book takes off. I loved it.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Sue Glendale, AZ, United States 02-04-07
    Sue Glendale, AZ, United States 02-04-07 Member Since 2007
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Doesn't suck"

    This funny story was greatly enhanced by the wonderful performance of the narrator. I plan on reading more by Christopher Moore because I enjoyed this one so much.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful

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