Don't get any on you.
When Comet Press put out the call for submissions for Stiff Things, we said we were ready to ratchet up the eroticism and visceral intensity with hardcore stories that penetrate new depths of psychosexual horror.
But we weren't as ready as we thought we were for the extreme stuff that came flooding in on waves of blood and other bodily fluids we won't mention here. Not that we're complaining.
In other words, we got what we wished for...and more. So much more that calling it an anthology of erotic horror was no longer strong enough.
The stories themselves dictated a new title. And so here are the stories for this upcoming release with a more apt title:
Stiff Things: The Splatterporn AnthologyModern Celebrity, by Brandon Ford
©2016 Comet Press (P)2016 Comet Press
host of the podcast Not In A Creepy Way, avid audiobook listener
I was warned that this was going to be very disturbing but it wasn't too gnarly.
Most of the stories were good. They are pretty typical horror anthology topics presented in an "extreme" fashion.
The narration was excellent, and i'm not just saying that because this audiobook was given by the narrator at no cost in exchange for an unbiased review via Audiobook Boom
Overall: If you understand this isn't Stephen King or Dean Koontz, you'll gave a good time.
Lots of short stories which I think is great. They range from mild to WAY out there. A few of the stories I had trouble following at first, but that could be because I was just coming from another story.
This audiobook was provided by the author, narrator, or publisher at no cost in exchange for an unbiased review courtesy of AudiobookBoom dot com
I like a wide range of genres. Favorites include Horror, SciFi, Fantasy, Thriller, LGBT, classics and history.
Some wonderfully twisted shit here. Loved it. A good collection of erotic horror. Perfect to spice up a long commute.
The narrator was enjoyable, he gave a good performance.
I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher.
About the middle of the pack.
The first story about the couple who picks up the bum. Wow, that set the tone and the bar a little high for the rest of the stories.
Solid as always.
Not really, no.
This was a book that I was hoping would help me tolerate my long daily commute. Mission accomplished!I was voluntarily provided this free review copy audiobook by the author, narrator, or publisher
I enjoy reading, listening and reviewing. I enjoy blogging. Doing what I enjoy giving feed back in hopes someone will try a new author.
I don’t even know where to begin there is some really twisted stories in here that will leave you with your mouth hung open and brain saying there is no way I heard that right. This is horror at its finest leaving you no doubt there are some really twisted people out there and hoping praying you never meet them. When the narrator posted he was looking for reviews “PM ME IF YOU DARE” he typed…okay you got my attention. I ask how you can you turn down a dare like that…NOT ME… I really didn’t have a clue what I just requested but it didn’t take me long to tell myself maybe we are in a little too deep here. From the start of the story there is no doubt this is hard core porn and I said to my self- self are you really going to listen to this. Self said a promise is a promise so yes we are. That lead me to looks of horror, thinking OH MY GOD that is nasty, really, wow didn’t see that coming, to shock as well as shaking in my shoes…okay maybe not the shaking part but I know I never want to meet any of these people. You have been warned…read on if you dare.
Mr. Hempel my hats off to you for the outstanding narration of this book. I am sure you set with your legs crossed and hands over your lap a time or two as you worked your way through this story. I had no trouble at all feeling the excitement of each character at the build up for some thrilling exciting sex scenes. You even had me feeling sorry for mankind and wanting to pull a few people right out of the pages as they took on the pleasure and then the pain when the end was clear. I found his character voices to be wonderful you have no trouble knowing who is talking, or how much pleasure they are in along with how much pain they feel along with the excitement the deliver is feeling as they bring the pleasure and pain on. There were no background noise (if there had been I would most likely have jumped out of my car running for my life) nor any places where the volume was louder than any other place in the audio. What this narrator gives you is clean, crisp, clear audio that will leave you shaking your head. You have no trouble visualizing what he has just given you it is very vivid that you become so invested you might forget where you where you are and what you are doing. I really wish I could give more than 5 Stars the narration was outstanding.
The first story starts out they are looking for some action as they have a few VERY HOT scenes with their selves. They finally found one to take up the call went home and got it on for everyone on the net as you yourself think oh and not in a good way. You think what are these people thinking and then you find out. As I was almost to work the audio left me speechless with my mouth hung open think no way that just happened. Yep Yep it did and lord they aren’t done. I had to set in my car listening until the end came still leaving me speechless. I have to honestly say this title fits the book in more ways than one. It will not be the first of these stories that will leave you speechless there are a few. Some I didn’t really care for it was a little hard to understand what the author was trying to show you but horror no doubt is in there. Others will leave you so shocked you won’t be able to talk leaving you looking straight ahead with eyes blinking afraid to face just what happened. Some are nasty beyond nasty and some will make you want to upchuck. This is one book that is filled with psychosexual horror that will leave men with their legs crossed and pulling back into their selves wishing they could run but to afraid to move. It will leave women shaking in horror wanting to run the other way. If you love horror and erotic take the dare and pick this up you will never see humans the same again. I know I am keeping an eye on those around me and I don’t think I will be making any new friends anytime soon. Lol This is just too horrible and to nasty but I bet it will stick with you for a long time. It’s not an audio for the weak there are some very vivid details that you won’t even have to close your eyes to see. I am still shaking my head. Words cannot do justice to some of these stories….
Volunteered requested a copy from NetGalley/Edelweiss /book tour/author/publisher
Although not written by Edward Lee it was very comparable. Gory, explicit, sickening at times, just down right wrong on many levels! I ,however enjoy these kind of stories tremendously so was thrilled. My only complaint is that it ended so soon, I wanted more stories! Splatterporn is the only fitting name so if that gross or offensive to you , don't read this. This book was gifted to me by the author for an honest review and I loved it but, I guess I'm a little twisted :-). Happy readings.
I am an avid reader and listener of horror and thrillers with the occasional SciFi and crime noir. I review on Amazon, GR, NG & Audible.
*I received a review audio copy of this work from the narrator in exchange for an honest review.
When searching for something that I want to read or listen to, I am not sure what it says about me that I see the title “Stiff Things: The Splatterporn Anthology” and am instantly thinking to myself “Hey, that sounds f*cking great!” My wife would be horrified. Oh, well…she married me. I am equally horrified when she picks up one of her fluffy, lovey, romance novels. Which is exactly what Stiff Things is - a feel good rom-com, except with much more bodily fluid and gore and with zero of the “feel good romance” part. Unless, you count necrophilia, rape, mutilation and torture, to be romance.
I have not heard of most of the authors in this collection and I always find that to be a hit or miss scenario for me, but ST pulls it off and now I have a few new-to-me authors to keep an eye out for. As for the stories themselves, there were some tales that I enjoyed more than others, but overall it was a well put together and entertaining range of format and styles. All of them worthy of the “splatterporn” title.
It has got to be hard to narrate a collection like this one without either laughing or puking. I am a fan of Joe Hemple and he shines in this kind of environment and does not shrink away from doing an audio that must have been extremely difficult at times. Thanks for the review copy, Joe! I can only wonder what others around me would be thinking if they could hear what I was listening to in my car.
If you like your dark fiction a wee messy and a whole lot of dark, this one might be your huckleberry. I am giving this one 3.5 Stars! Good, not great, but worth your time to check out some new up and coming authors. No pun intended.
always on the road so im always listening to books
I received this book free of charge for an honest review. weird little stories, probably the most awkward book I've ever bought, performed well, and not bad stories just makes you realize how many really out there kinks there are out there, and your personal issues really aren't that strange compared to someone else
"This review copy audiobook was provided by the author, narrator, or publisher at no cost."
I've never listened to anything as disturbing as this book! There were times that I had to press pause so I could just try and and figure out how someone could come up with something like this. I thoroughly enjoyed the experience!
I am 71 year's old I listen to a lot of mysteries I like cute ones I really like the cozy mysteries I like Christmas mysteries and horror
that is some sick stuff, smut it was fast pace different stories must listen no kids please. just sick adults I received this book from the author, publisher and or narrator for a honest review and unbiased option from audio book boom dot com
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