Unbearable Lightness

A Story of Loss and Gain

By: Portia de Rossi

Narrated by: Portia de Rossi

Length: 9 hrs and 18 mins

Publisher's summary

“I didn’t decide to become anorexic. It snuck up on me disguised as a healthy diet, a professional attitude. Being as thin as possible was a way to make the job of being an actress easier . . .”

Portia de Rossi weighed only 82 pounds when she collapsed on the set of the Hollywood film in which she was playing her first leading role. This should have been the culmination of all her years of hard work - first as a child model in Australia, then as a cast member of one of the hottest shows on American television. On the outside she was thin and blond, glamorous and successful. On the inside, she was literally dying.

In this searing, unflinchingly honest book, Portia de Rossi captures the complex emotional truth of what it is like when food, weight, and body image take priority over every other human impulse or action. She recounts the elaborate rituals around eating that came to dominate hours of every day, from keeping her daily calorie intake below 300 to eating precisely measured amounts of food out of specific bowls and only with certain utensils. When this wasn’t enough, she resorted to purging and compulsive physical exercise, driving her body and spirit to the breaking point.

Even as she rose to fame as a cast member of the hit television shows Ally McBeal and Arrested Development, Portia alternately starved herself and binged, all the while terrified that the truth of her sexuality would be exposed in the tabloids. She reveals the heartache and fear that accompany a life lived in the closet, a sense of isolation that was only magnified by her unrelenting desire to be ever thinner. With the storytelling skills of a great novelist and the eye for detail of a poet, Portia makes transparent as never before the behaviors and emotions of someone living with an eating disorder.

From her lowest point, Portia began the painful climb back to a life of health and honesty, falling in love with and eventually marrying Ellen DeGeneres, and emerging as an outspoken and articulate advocate for gay rights and women’s health issues.

In this remarkable and beautifully written work, Portia shines a bright light on a dark subject. A crucial book for all those who might sometimes feel at war with themselves or their bodies, Unbearable Lightness is a story that inspires hope and nourishes the spirit.

©2010 Simon & Schuster Audio; 2010 Portia de Rossi

Critic reviews

“Breathtakingly honest, brutal and beautiful.” (Jonathan Safran Foer)

“Possibly the best book on the subject ever written. De Rossi is the real deal, a fine writer with a sharp mind and substance. This rich, layered book of remarkable courage, power, and significance will serve as life-changing inspiration for many.” (Augusten Burroughs)

“De Rossi tells her story with genuine insight and unflinching honesty. You will cheer her on.” —Jeannette Walls

Great story, great writing.

There was nothing about this book I didn't enjoy. Not only her harrowing story which is of course interesting to see it through but the writing and reading are so beautiful.

Must read for anyone who's ever struggled with food

As an eating disorder survivor, I related to so much of Portia's story. Anyone who has ever used and abused food or their bodies because they didn't feel like they were enough will find inspiration in Portia's journey and recovery.

Stunning

This is such a beautiful book. It drew me in and really held my attention. She really understands her story and tells it in a wonderful, multi-layered way. Very moving.

The whole book

I felt like it is the hidden story of every girl ,especially when it came to the end when she said I gain every pound I lost

Lovely. Lightly heavy.

Where does Unbearable Lightness rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

This book is enlightening and heavy-hearted. It is an excellent book!

What was one of the most memorable moments of Unbearable Lightness?

Sheesh. I listen when I drive... that's tough.

Have you listened to any of Portia de Rossi’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

no. this is very well-done.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

It did make me giggle and also cry.

Any additional comments?

I think this book would, could and must help young and not so young folks realize that anorexia and bulimia is a real issue and they are not alone.

Not unbearable listening

What made the experience of listening to Unbearable Lightness the most enjoyable?

I liked that Portia read her own words. That is always a great thing to experience.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes! I hated to not get to know more. I loved how honest she was.

Wow

This book was wonderfully brave. I love Porta as an actress but I respect and admire her as an author for this book. I wish it was a mandatory read for all young women in high school or college. Simply fantastic.

Truly enjoyed this book

Learned a lot of things about this woman, gained a whole new respect and admiration for her.

great insight to rough a subject

this was tough to listen to but learned alot. so happy the ending was a happy one.

Harsh Reality -- Brave Insights

Portia di Rossi is very brave to share the story of her struggles with her eating disorder and fears over her own sexual preference being outed. The book goes into detail about what was going on in her head during her many years of struggling with binging and purging, anorexia, excessive exercise, laxative use, etc. I felt emotionally drained by it, but in the end, realized what a service she's provided for others who are either struggling now, or who aren't even aware that they have a problem. It gives hope to anyone who struggles with self-image problems revolving around weight. I am very glad for her happy ending where she got help and succeeded in her battle against her eating disorder.

Companies who sell beauty image products create an unrealistic goal for many girls and women to achieve. I am grateful to those like Portia who share their stories in order to help others see beyond the madness. Beauty comes from the heart and soul.