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Assholes Finish First Audiobook
Assholes Finish First
Written by: 
Tucker Max
Narrated by: 
Tucker Max
Assholes Finish First Audiobook

Assholes Finish First

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Publisher's Summary

What do you do after you write a number-one best-selling book about your drunken, sexual misadventures that makes you rich and famous? Celebrate by getting more drunk and having insane amounts of sex, obviously. And pretty soon you've got another f-ing book on your hands. Stuffed full of ridiculous stories of bad decisions, debauchery, and sexual recklessness, Assholes Finish First starts where I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell left off, then proceeds to "some next-level shit." You already know how women react to confidence, game, and vodka, but what happens when you add money and fame to the mix? You get answers to the hard questions you've never thought of asking: What's it like to have sex with a midget? What about two midgets? How does it feel to get multiple requests to "fuck for charity"? What does it do to a man to watch a 19-year-old do wind sprints to sober up, so that she can have sex with you before her twin sister does? At what number of virgins does deflowering them stop being fun and start feeling like a job? When a girl you met three hours ago decides to tattoo your name next to her pussy, what is the appropriate reaction? Can you X-ray a blowjob? The answers are inside, they are absurd and hilarious, and they are the product of one man's experiences: His name is Tucker Max, and he is still an asshole.

©2010 Tucker Max (P)2010 Simon and Schuster Audio

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (528 )
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4.2 (399 )
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Performance
Sort by:
  •  
    Nate Dumonseau 10-02-10 Member Since 2016
    HELPFUL VOTES
    9
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    48
    4
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    "Tucker learned to read."

    Upon re-reading "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell," I have decided this is as funny, if not more so. That combined with the fact Tucker as infinitely improved his narrating skills makes this book a must read.

    2 of 2 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Michael Chester, MD, United States 01-05-12
    Michael Chester, MD, United States 01-05-12 Member Since 2015

    World Explorer

    HELPFUL VOTES
    27
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    "Tucker is an a-hole from start to finish"
    Would you try another book from Tucker Max and/or Tucker Max?

    Maybe if there was more to the book than just having sex with multiple women and drinking stories.


    Would you recommend Assholes Finish First to your friends? Why or why not?

    If they were looking for a break from audiobooks that had some redeeming qualities and just want an escape to the ultimate hedonistic lifestyle. If you need some clever derogatory comments, this is your book.


    Did the narration match the pace of the story?

    Yes - Tucker does a good job of telling his story.


    Was Assholes Finish First worth the listening time?

    Yes, but if it were any longer, I would not have finished it. There are definitely some funny parts.


    3 of 4 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Teri Hollister, CA, United States 04-29-11
    Teri Hollister, CA, United States 04-29-11
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Awesome book"

    This is a book that is spoken from the first person by an articulate individual that does what he wants and is driven by 2 things beer and women. Some of the stories are crude but hilarious. If you are a type of person that can not laugh at things that are not PC then don't read this book.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Tyrell 10-14-10
    Tyrell 10-14-10
    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Duped"

    I love the first book, but this one is not funny at all. The first book is awesome. However, like the title says for this book, he comes across as a complete a-hole.
    I think these stories are the ones that were on the cutting floor for his first book.

    2 of 3 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Erin 07-21-16
    Erin 07-21-16 Member Since 2016
    ratings
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    2
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    "Very entertaining"

    great book, worth the read. laughed so hard during the story of him fucking a virgin and having the worst gas and needing to shit so bad he stopped several times to use the bathroom and went back at it! I mean who does that?!?!!! you gotta read to believe.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    beavis 07-06-16
    beavis 07-06-16 Member Since 2014
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    5
    1
    Overall
    "Even better than the first."

    I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell = pre fame.
    Assholes Finish First = post fame.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Jared 11-30-15
    Jared 11-30-15 Member Since 2015
    HELPFUL VOTES
    15
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    "Hilarious, just be aware of who's listening."

    This book is an epic of vulgar buffoonery with little to no redeeming qualities to be found in tucker max. You will get him, and laugh anyway.

    Be forewarned, listening to this book while he is doing a walk through may be a slight miscalculation, or so I may have heard.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    James Moyse 11-08-15
    James Moyse 11-08-15
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    3
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    "Decent if you liked the first book"

    Only read this if you read I hope they serve beer in hell and you really, really, liked it. This book is almost as funny

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Taylor 10-11-15
    Taylor 10-11-15
    ratings
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    1
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    "This is great"

    It's great to hear tucker max tell tucker Max's tale . It's also great that he stands unapologetically for what he did, yes it might offend your delicate sensibilities but truest statements are never easy to hear.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    KellyM 07-21-15
    KellyM 07-21-15
    ratings
    REVIEWS
    15
    4
    Overall
    Performance
    Story
    "More Tucker..."

    If you've read any of his bogs or previous books, then you already know what to expect from this book. It's immature at best but if you're looking for frat boy humor then you get it here.

    Performance leaves a bit to be desired but I'd say it's at least a bit better than his previous read. (Listen at a slower speed if the slurring becomes too much)

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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