A masterpiece of satire, this classic has entertained and enlightened readers the world over with its sly and ironic portrayal of human life and foibles from the vantage point of Screwtape, a highly placed assistant to "Our Father Below". At once wildly comic, deadly serious, and strikingly original, C.S. Lewis gives us the correspondence of the worldly-wise old Devil to his nephew, Wormwood, a novice demon in charge of securing the damnation of an ordinary young man.
If one George Carlin audio is funny, then two are funnier and three must be funniest, right? That's our thinking behind this new collection. t's a HighBridge library of laugh-out-loud, award-winning recordings featuring George himself performing many of his best bits.
"Like a Cast of Thousands"
The star of Parks and Recreation and author of the New York Times best seller Paddle Your Own Canoe returns with a second book that humorously highlights 21 figures from our nation's history, from her inception to present day - Nick's personal pantheon of "great Americans".
"Swagger and mirth"
"I've experienced a whole lot the last few years and I have a lot to share. So I hope that you'll take a moment to sit back, relax and enjoy the words I've put together for you in this book. I think you'll find I've left no stone unturned, no door unopened, no window unbroken, no rug unvacuumed, no ivories untickled. What I'm saying is, let us begin, shall we?" (Ellen DeGeneres)
Kate Schechter would like to know why everyone she meets knows her name - and why Thor, the Norse god of thunder, keeps showing up on her doorstep. Dirk Gently, detective and refrigerator wrestler, can uncover the mystery, and only the absurdist wit of Douglas Adams can recount them with such relentless humor.
"Makes you miss him even more..."
If you graduated from college but still feel like a student...if you wear a business suit to job interviews but pajamas to the grocery store...if you have your own apartment but no idea how to cook or clean...it's OK. But it doesn't have to be this way. Just because you don't feel like an adult doesn't mean you can't act like one. And it all begins with this funny, wise, and useful book. Based on Kelly Williams Brown's popular blog, Adulting makes the scary, confusing "real world" approachable, manageable - and even conquerable.
"Great for Young Adults"
God Is Disappointed in You is for people who would like to read the Bible...if it would just cut to the chase. Stripped of its arcane language and interminable passages, every book of the Bible is condensed down to its core message, in no more than a few pages each. Written by Mark Russell with cartoons by New Yorker cartoonist Shannon Wheeler, God Is Disappointed in You is a frequently hilarious, often shocking, but always accurate retelling of the Bible, including the parts selectively left out by Sunday School teachers.
"The Only Audio Book I Started Again Immediately"
Academy Award nominee Samuel L. Jackson (Pulp Fiction) rocks this mock bedtime story, capturing a hilarious range of emotions as the voice of a father struggling to get his child to sleep. Go the F**k to Sleep is a bedtime book for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don’t always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland.
"Read the F--king REVIEW!"
We never know what will happen next in Florida. We know only that, any minute now, something will. Every few months, Dave Barry gets a call from some media person wanting to know, "What the hell is wrong with Florida?" Somehow, the state's acquired an image as a subtropical festival of stupid, and as a loyal Floridian, Dave begs to differ. Sure, there was the 2000 election. And people seem to take their pants off for no good reason. And it has flying insects the size of LeBron James. But it is a great state, and Dave is going to tell you why.
A compilation of funny, irreverently reverent stories on aligning with the Divine in daily life. For the passionately spiritual and bemusedly skeptical alike. Adapted from a popular column originally published as "San Francisco's Spiritual Examiner" at examiner.com. "What if God IS the story? What if the Divine is constantly igniting roadside flares to get our attention? What if there actually IS a Supreme Organizing Principle with a ribald and unbridled sense of humor? And what if we each have this ardent inner suitor who's writing us love letters every day that often go unopened?"
"Perfect blend of depth and humor"
Book store nation, in the history of mankind there has never been a greater country than America. You could say we're the number one nation at being the best at greatness. But as perfect as America is in every single way, America is broken! And we can't exchange it because we're 236 years past the 30-day return window. Look around - we don't make anything anymore, we've mortgaged our future to China, and the Apologist-in-Chief goes on world tours just to bow before foreign leaders.
"Not His Best, but Still Funny"
The first installment in Giles Milton's outrageously entertaining series, History's Unknown Chapters: Colorful and accessible, intelligent and illuminating, Milton shows his customary historical flair as he delves into the little-known stories from the past. There's the cook aboard the Titanic who pickled himself with whiskey and survived in the icy seas where most everyone else died. There's the man who survived the atomic bombs in both Hiroshima and Nagasaki. And there's many, many more.
What The Daily Show is to evening news, The Colbert Report is to personality-driven pundit shows. Colbert brings his sarcastic charm to a half-hour report, tackling the important issues of the day and telling his guests why their opinions are just plain wrong. Stephen stands for "truthiness" and his American right to copyright that word and claim ownership of it. The author describes this as a simple audiobook from a simple mind: Stephen Colbert's.
"Funny, but disappointing."
From the larger, louder half of the world-famous magic duo Penn & Teller comes a scathingly funny reinterpretation of The Ten Commandments. They are The Penn Commandments, and they reveal one outrageous and opinionated atheist’s experience in the world.
"More memoir than theology"
Asher Hearst is a college student, and the closest thing he has to a superpower is being able to take a punch. Basically all he has going for him is an edgy sense of humor - and that he can't die. As a small-time fixer, he's about to get involved in a job best left alone. After he gets involved with witches and the supernatural, there's no turning back.
"Creative Indie Author"
Dirk Gently has an unshakeable belief in the interconnectedness of all things, but his Holistic Detective Agency mainly succeeds in tracking down missing cats for old ladies. Then Dirk stumbles upon an old friend behaving bizarrely - and he's drawn into a four-billion-year-old mystery that must be solved if the human race is to avoid immediate extinction.
Mark Russell & Shannon Wheeler's faithful yet irreverent approach to the Bible made their book God Is Disappointed in You a modern cult classic. Now, by popular demand, they turn their attention to the best parts left out of the canonical Bible, including the Midrash, the Apocrypha, Gnostic Gospels, and more! And if you thought the Bible had some weird stuff in it....
"A Goldmine of Weirdness"
In the tradition of the late, great George Carlin, Corey Taylor, the lead singer of Slipknot and Stone Sour, sounds off in hilarious fashion about the many vagaries of modern life that piss him off. Whether it's people's rude behavior in restaurants and malls, the many indignities of air travel, eye-searingly terrible fashion choices, dangerously clueless drivers, and - most of all - the sorry state of much modern music, Taylor's humor and insight cover civil society's seeming decline.
"Laughed so hard, I cried"
Emmy Award-winning actor Bryan Cranston (Breaking Bad, Malcom in the Middle) follows in the exasperated footsteps of Samuel L. Jackson, giving voice to the long-suffering father whose indifferent child will just not eat in this hilarious follow-up to Adam Mansbach's international best seller, Go the F--k to Sleep.
"Another role that Bryan Cranston plays to a T."
As a prisoner of war, Andrew Jackson walked several miles barefoot across state lines while suffering from smallpox and a serious head wound received when he refused to polish the boots of the soldiers who had taken him captive. He was thirteen years old. A few decades later, he became the first popularly elected president and served the nation, pausing briefly only to beat a would-be assassin with a cane to within an inch of his life.
"Absolutely One of the Funniest Books on Audible."
This audiobook tells 15 short stories about people living at Burnside Retirement Village. Retirees buy into the community to socialize and appreciate the peace and quiet. WRONG! It's where over 55 year olds go who are bored, who enjoy a good fight, hate authority, argue like hell, question every rule and regulation, love to interfere in the lives of others and, of course, it is where those who create stories about such people live!
Perennially down-and-out socialite Camilla Randall - aka The Manners Doctor - is a magnet for murder, mayhem, and Mr. Wrong, but she always solves the mystery in her quirky, but oh-so-polite way. Usually with more than a little help from her gay best friend, Plantagenet Smith. In this hilarious episode she makes the mistake of responding to an online review of one of her etiquette guides and sets off a chain of events that leads to arson, attempted rape, and murder.
Lee St. John is a mess. She tries to behave like the Southern Belle she was brought up to be, but her playful high jinxes just get in the way. She can't help it. Bless her heart. As an only child she learned how to entertain herself and, with self-deprecating humor, she just lets it rip. No filter. But she does have a soft spot for memories of her generation, her parents' generation, and her children's generation and these vintage but entertaining vignettes will either melt your heart or leave you LOL - Lee Out Loud!
Amid the cactus wilds some two hundred miles from Hollywood lies a privileged oasis called Desert D'Or. It is a place for starlets and would-be starlets, directors, studio execs, and the well-groomed lowlifes who cater to them. And, as imagined by Norman Mailer in this blistering classic of 1950s Hollywood, Desert D'Or is a moral proving ground, where men and women discover what they really want - and how far they are willing to go to get it.
When Lionel Savage, a popular poet in Victorian London, learns from his butler that they're broke, he marries the beautiful Vivien Lancaster for her money, only to find that his muse has abandoned him. Distraught and contemplating suicide, Savage accidentally conjures the devil - the polite "Gentleman" of the title - who appears at one of the society parties Savage abhors. The two hit it off: The devil talks about his home, where he employs Dante as a gardener; Savage lends him a volume of Tennyson.
"Well done Old Boy!"
Trump Is Nuts! features Trump as many kinds of nuts, such as cashew nuts, almond nuts, pistachio nuts, and of course, mixed-up nuts as well as nut cases and nuthouses. And just like there have been Trump Steaks and Trump Vodka, maybe a line of Trump Nuts will be next. Each illustration is combined with satiric copy describing how Trump is this kind of nut. An audio companion to the print book.
Jeeves is on holiday in Herne Bay, and while he's away, the world caves in on Bertie Wooster. For a start, Bertie's astonished to read in the Times of his own engagement to the mercurial Bobbie Wickham. Then, at Brinkley Court, his Aunt Dahlia's establishment, he finds his awful former headmaster in attendance, ready to award the prizes at Market Snodsbury Grammar School. And finally the Brinkley butler turns out, for reasons of his own, to be Bertie's nemesis in disguise, the brain surgeon Sir Roderick.
In this humorous audiobook the author gives clear and hilarious guidelines on how to become more Irish than the Irish themselves. No subject is left untouched, from Irish slang, famous Irish castles and landmarks to Ireland's newest UFC hero Conor McGregor aka "The Notorious". This audiobook is a must for anyone intending to visit Ireland or for the millions in the Irish diaspora abroad wanting to reconnect with their Irish heritage.
If Lord Ickenham had not succumbed to the temptation to dislodge the hat of Beefy Bastable, the irascible QC, with a well-aimed Brazil nut, the latter's famous legal mind might never have been stimulated to literature. But the incident provoked Beefy to write his exposé of the younger generation, a novel so shocking that it caused endless repercussions for its hapless author, and sparked off a whole series of outrageous misunderstandings that it would take the inventive talents of Lord Ickenham himself to resolve.
Bill (Lord) Rowcester was well and truly in the gumbo. With the benefit of hindsight he could see that setting himself up as a Silver Ring bookie might not have been his smartest move ever. Particularly when being down on his dibbs threatens his oncoming nuptials with the sterling Jill Wyvern. Lucky for Bill he had the land-lease of Jeeves. Lucky indeed that the fish-fed mastermind's formidable genius was at liberty to take a header into such teasers as borrowing the stellar Mrs. Spottsworth's pendent for an hour or three.
Everyone - even Augustus the cat - has cause to be obliged to Jeeves when he manages to retrieve the infamous Book, the book kept under lock and key at the Junior Ganymede Club and which lays bare the private lives of three-quarters of the upper classes - and which could prove to be political dynamite at the Market Snodsbury by-election! It once again falls to Bertie Wooster's manservant to save the day.
These wonderfully funny short stories feature a cast of outrageous characters, all plotting to save themselves from wedlock, poverty, or ignominy - with various degrees of success. This recording includes the following stories: "All's Well with Bingo", "Bingo and the Peke Crisis", "The Editor Regrets", "Sonny Boy", "Anselm Gets His Chance", "Romance at Droitgate Spa", "A Bit of Luck for Mabel", "Buttercup Day", and "Ukridge and the Old Stepper".
On doctor's orders, Bertie Wooster retires to sample the bucolic delights of Maiden Eggesford. But his idyll is rudely shattered by Aunt Dahlia who wants him to nobble a racehorse. Similar blots on Bertie's horizon come in the shape of Major Plank, the African explorer, Vanessa Cook, proud beauty and "molder of men," and Orlo Porter who seems to have nothing else to do but think of sundering Bertie's head from his body.
Ever meet a hot billionaire while your hand's in a toilet in the men's room of one of his stores? No? So it really is just me. Hmm. When you're a mystery shopper, you get paid to humiliate yourself, all in the name of improving customer service. Romance isn't in my job description. But the day I met Declan McCormick it was love at first flush. Until I nearly castrated him with my EpiPen. How Hot Guy and Toilet Girl became an item involves my crazy mom, a trip to the ER, my homicidal cat, my fake wife, and true love.
Professor Harold Berwyn has just been brutally murdered, but graduate creative writing student Skip Gershwin is too self-absorbed to care. His chief preoccupations are finding a girlfriend and becoming a famous American poet. When he meets Gudrun Frege, a brilliant Austrian au pair, it appears that his girlfriend problems are over. But he is soon lured into a torrid love affair by ultra-seductive art student Lana Fish. As Skip's romantic entanglements spiral out of control, the criminal investigation into Berwyn's murder turns white-hot.
"Madcap Comedy With Sci-Fi Element!"
Eden in Purrgatory: A Satire is a satirical, yet well-researched prequel to Eden at Play: A Grown-Up Fable. It initiates a thematic trilogy that explores our relationship, for good or ill, with spiritual matters. This novel includes a section on the historical aspects that are not limited to many of its characters. I also pay tribute to The Arabian Nights, Homer, and Greek mythology as well as the burgeoning Christian religion.
The Cooks didn't care much for the cats swarming in from the abandoned sections of used-up coal refineries, invading their little slice of paradise with multitudes of nightmarish felines with strange glowing green eyes. What do these strays want? And why won't they go away? The Cooks will learn that some cats just want to watch the world burn.
"Mystically powered terrorists unleash volatile magic on the world, turning Washington, D.C., into a politically-charged fantasyland ripe for human sacrifice. Attackers with magical abilities bring down a 747 by summoning a dragon to rip it from the sky, using the hundreds of lives lost as a sacrifice to initiate the Change. The country morphs into a new landscape of swords and sorcery. Now computers and other machines are coming to life, and regular people have started to turn into mythical creatures and forgotten deities." (Kirkus Reviews)
"And Now for Something Completely Different"
Master storyteller and satirist Kurt Vonnegut was one of the most in-demand commencement speakers of his time. For each occasion, Vonnegut’s words were unfailingly unique, insightful, and witty, and they stayed with audience members long after graduation. As edited by Dan Wakefield, this book reads like a narrative in the unique voice that made Vonnegut a hero to readers and listeners of all ages. At times hilarious, razor-sharp, freewheeling, and deeply serious, these reflections are ideal for anyone undergoing what Vonnegut would call their "long-delayed puberty ceremony".
"This IS nice"
P.J. O’Rourke began writing funny things in 1960s underground newspapers, became editor-in-chief of National Lampoon, then spent 20 years reporting for Rolling Stone and The Atlantic Monthly as the world’s only trouble spot humorist, going to wars, riots, rebellions, and other "Holidays in Hell” in more than 40 countries.
"This is not about the baby boom"
In Modern Manners, cultural guru P. J. O'Rourke provides the essential accessory for the truly contemporary man or woman - a rulebook for living in a world without rules. Traditionally, good manners were a means of becoming as bland and invisible as everyone else, and thus of avoiding calling attention to one's own awkwardness and stupidity.
Downton Abbey has brought out the Anglophile in American fans of the hit TV series. But Anglophilia has a long history in America. Why are some native-born residents of our Shining City Upon a Hill, where All Men Are Created Equal, seduced by the fluting tones of manor-born privilege? At last, Anglophilia explained - in American, thank you.
"Qualifies as my most irritating Audible purchase"
A quirky and darkly comic take on domestic life in southern India. Ousep Chacko, journalist and failed novelist, prides himself on being "the last of the real men." This includes waking neighbors upon returning late from the pub. His wife Mariamma stretches their money, raises their two boys, and, in her spare time, gleefully fantasizes about Ousep dying. One day, their seemingly happy seventeen-year-old son Unni - an obsessed comic-book artist - falls from the balcony, leaving them to wonder whether it was an accident.
They love nothing better than sipping free-trade gourmet coffee, leafing through the Sunday New York Times, and listening to David Sedaris on NPR (ideally all at the same time). Apple products, indie music, food co-ops, and vintage T-shirts make them weak in the knees. They believe they're unique, yet somehow they're all exactly the same.
"Hilarious...but maybe not for everyone"
When Bonnie Grayduck relocates from sunny Santa Cruz California to the small town of Lake Woebegotten, Minnesota, to live with her estranged father, chief of the local two-man police department, she thinks she's leaving her troubles behind. But she soon becomes fascinated by another student - the brooding, beautiful Edwin Scullen, whose reclusive family hides a terrible secret. (Psst: they're actually vampires. But they're the kind who don't eat people, so it's okay.)
"Not A Bad Deal At All"
The antidote to those cotton-candy platitudes that are all too familiar to anyone who’s ever worn a mortarboard, Wheelan’s 10 head-turning aphorisms - backed up by a PhD in public policy and extensive social science research - set the record straight. Readers everywhere agreed, turning a Dartmouth Class Day speech that had gone viral into a best-selling book.
A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor People in Ireland From Being a Burden to Their Parents or Country, and for Making Them Beneficial to the Public, commonly referred to as A Modest Proposal, is a Juvenalian satirical essay written and published anonymously by Jonathan Swift in 1729. Swift suggests in his essay that the impoverished Irish might ease their economic troubles by selling children as food. By doing this he mocks the authority of the British officials.
"Not a bad proposal at all"
Your future is...limited! Wait, we mean...limiting...No, hold on...limitless. Sometimes your first steps into the "real world" send you falling flat on your face. It's natural to be optimistic about new experiences, but most of us set ourselves up only to be let down every time. And disappointment hurts like a $%&*#. News flash: You don't have to be an Einstein to survive adult life. You don't even have to abandon your standards to get what you want. All you have to do is keep your expectations realistic.
"If only I had this book in my twenties"
Gazing into the bathroom mirror one morning while shaving, Josh Kornbluth realizes that he looks remarkably like the guy on the $100 bill. Like any good Jewish son, he immediately calls his mother. From there he becomes obsessed with what it means to be a founding father, especially when your own father/son relationship (Ben had an illegitimate son named William who was a British loyalist during the Revolutionary War) is more than a bit strained.
It’s impossible to go a full day without using snark, so why fight it? Snark is everywhere, from television to movies to everyday life. This lively collection provides hours of entertainment - better than an Etch A Sketch, and more fun than Silly Putty! At the heart of it, being in a state of snark can be one of the most useful tools at one’s disposal and hence (yes, I used “hence”), a powerful way to get what you want. With snark, you can catch people completely off-guard, and royally piss them off.
"I PAID MONEY FOR THIS!!!??$?"
The Donkey and the Darling is an infamous parody of children's fairy tales that is classic Terry Southern. Originally a collaboration with painter Larry Rivers, there were only 35 physical copies created of what turned out to be the most expensive and labor-intensive project ever created by University Limited Art Edition. This audio version is a unique, winking performance by Steven Crossley.
Kids, a Primer is a collection of a grandfather's musings on the way his (now grown) children are raising their children and being glad about being a grandparent rather than a new parent with young children (again). While Ungar is convinced that grandparents could do a better job raising children if they had the energy, he is grateful that he, in fact, no longer has the energy.
"Entertaining but not for kids"
Meet Gregor Samsa, a humble young man who works as a fabric salesman to support his parents and sister. His life goes strangely awry when he wakes up late for work and discovers that, inexplicably, he is now a man-sized baby kitten. His family freaks out: Yes, their son is OMG so cute, but what good is cute when there are bills to pay? As his new feline identity threatens to eat away at his personality, Gregor desperately tries to survive this bizarre, bewhiskered ordeal by accomplishing the one thing he never could as a man: He must flee his parents’ house.
Sure, everyone gets sick sometimes, but do you realize that plenty of those folks also die slow, unpleasant deaths from diseases that stumped even the experts at top-notch (still privately run) hospitals? That's right: There are plenty of illnesses that even physicians have never heard about. Nodding Disease, Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, and Cutaneous Horn (yes, you grow a horn) are all featured here in pithy, energetic entries. You won't have to worry about socialized medicine if you have this book....