BOMT (The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee) visits a unnamed multiverse that we cannot name because it was cancelled for being ‘uniphobic’ – phobic of everything in the universe that one can be phobic about. If we mention the name of this cancelled universe we will be cancelled across every platform of the multiverse.

BOMT begins the episode by asking a question, the answer to which being the key to accomplishing anything in this universe: “Who do I have to fuck to get anything done around here?” BOMT will reveal the name of the man you have to fuck to get anything done and if you have to give assplay as well.

BOMT introduces three notoriously politically incorrect comedians, their strategies for not being cancelled, and whether or not their balls can be reattached.

BOMT’s answer to painful swollen roids is the new Haemmeroff inflatable underpants.

While on the subject of colossal pains in the ass - everyone’s least favourite Tiktok influencer, The Prat Prankster, is back influencing the public to beat the shit out him for his obnoxious pranks.

Sammy The Toothpick returns with another condensed classic as he tackles condensing ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’, leaving the king without clothes and exposing his tiny dinky in a mere ten seconds.

In this week’s episode of ‘The Unknown Hitler’, we examine Hitler’s obsession with young German boys in lederhosen and his infamous “Just look at Göring wearing those lederhosen, wear those lederhosen you hot German Nazi bitch general!” speech that defined WW2.

We end the episode with a warning to those movie spoilers who do not responsibly use spoiler alerts (especially you Eleanor) with the tragic Psycho spoiler incident of 1960.

BOMT (The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee) scrubs its private parts with industrial cleaner after it visits the universe “Fukhorse”, where humans love animals… just a little too much. Let’s not delve into this further… we’ll just say they love animals a little too much.

BOMT begins the episode by examining why you may love animals a bit too much with the question, “Do you have low sexual self-esteem?” If you are on your knees giving head to a well-hung sewer rat of no fixed abode – this question has already been answered.

BOMT brings you the latest breakthrough in medicine: The Spine Removal Institute. Cure backache by simply removing your spine, a treatment not available to politicians and certain other groups born without one.

In ‘Live Like An Animal’– our resident Instagram naturist learns from the animals and is careful not to lift his leg and pee on our camera equipment.

Finally, a frustrated and horny Disney animator prepares for a rodent gang bang with Mini Mouse.

BOMT (The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee) poots and farts four degrees left to dimension “Arse 4”, one whole degree and one less whiff from dimension Arse 3. It is a dimension which embraces an arse-centric view of the ‘hole’ universe.

BOMT begins with a profound moment of introspection and asks you, “Are you a pretentious twat?” If you are, you can reply ‘jes’ or ‘ne; since a REAL pretentious twats reply in Esperanto.

BOMT introduces us to ‘The Carnivore Naturalist’ as he only dines from fresh living animals. Witness him eat an elephant’s arse (not in a sexual way – but in a nutritious one).

BOMT uses the revolutionary ‘Sound Behind technology’ to peek at the sound behind the important events that shaped history. This week we look at the logistics of changing a nappy (in the UK) or diaper (in America) of a US president.

Death is no reason to lie around and be bored out of your decomposing mind when you bring your deceased beloved to Corpseland to have the time of their deaths.

Finally, can you remain aloof and business like when a man, even if he is a professional, sticks his finger in up your arse? This is answered in the touching romance “Me And My Proctologist”

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patreon.com/BOMT_Podcast

Episode 2 has BOMT (The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee) transmitting from a timeline which contradicts Winston Churchill’s assertion that “History is written by the victors”. In this timeline, history (and everything else) is written by losers. To be more precise: complete fucking losers.

We begin this week’s excursion with advice for those suffering from a ‘Homosexual Oedipus Complex’ and the best ways to kill mom and ‘do it’ with dad.

BOMT visits the bistro where fine dining is accompanied by an orgasm and where, instead of pairing wine with food, the food is paired with sex. If you ever desired a bratwurst up your arse paired with Schnitzel or having kippered herring stuffed in a rusted trombone – this is the bistro for you.

Experience first class treatment at American Tourmaster Hotels, where tipping isn’t expected and arse play is optional.

Hollywood legend Sam Fluggelman shares exclusive, never before seen, footage from his original cut of “Gone With The Wind” and the infamous Clark Gabel emergency trouser change incident.

Sammy The Toothpick is back… back? You never knew he left! Witness some assholes waiting around as Sammy hits us with another condensed classic: “Waiting For Godot” to 20 seconds.

For those fucking history snobs out there BOMT is giving a history lesson with the latest ‘Hitler Unknown’, this week’s episode: ‘That Fucking Moustache’. We reveal the truth about Hitler’s insistence that he didn’t want to be confused with the little tramp because of his moustache and that he was referring to Marline Dietrich and not Charlie Chaplin.

Everyone’s/ no-one’s favourite Tiktok star, The Prat Prankster, pulls an hysterical pole wacker of prank, scares the crap out of two lovers, and gives a mortician a heart attack after being accidentally autopsied. Definitive proof that being a colossal obnoxious asshole isn’t required to be a social media influencer, but… actually being a colossal obnoxious asshole is required.

BOMT ends our journey with the woke film event of the year: “ I am Not Henry, I Am Daisy Bell”. If if you don’t agree that this is the most important movie in film history then fuck you, you are an artistic racist and shall be cancelled!

Visit our Patreon page for membership:

patreon.com/BOMT_Podcast

8 May 2024

On our premier, very first, episode: BOMT (The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee) transmits from the multiverse: ‘Douche Colossus’, known as the most self-centred ‘me-verse’ of the multiverse.

If you’re listening from Douche Colossus, please reframe from writing love poems to yourself for a moment and listen to the first sketch which asks the critical existential question, “Are you a douche?” And, if you are, do you know which part of the body you should be cleaning?

Strap yourself in for another thrilling adventure of ‘Frank Schwab: School detective’. This week feckless Frank solves the stench infested mystery of the heinous, overpowering, pants pooper.

And, if you think the humour can’t get any lower, next is everyone’s favourite sexual do-it-yourself programme: Practical Sexuality, where you will learn what you can and cannot fit inside you and where in your body you should never stick it.

Humble yourself to the film bio of the most amazing, important, human on the face of the Earth, the man Jesus, God, and all 33 million deities of Hinduism aspire to be like: The Leonard Q. Banglebaum Jr Story.

We conclude our journey to this multiverse with the most pressing issue that threatens extension of our species: the natural gas that the human-ish body expels every moment, is killing our planet, and making a journeys in a sealed elevator unbreathable. We follow the heroic anti-flatulence fascist ‘Just Stop Gas’ complainers/campaigners as they demonstrate why you shouldn’t glue your penis to priceless paintings in protest and how to clench, hold in your natural body gas, and save the planet.

Visit our Patreon page for membership:

patreon.com/BOMT_Podcast

Another short promo for The Battery Operated Magic Toupee - The Podcast, launching 8 May 2024.

Another short promo for The Battery Operated Magic Toupee - The Podcast, launching 8 May 2024.

-Promo for new upcoming series-

The Battery-Operated Magic Toupee journeys across the multiverse, from world to world, culture to culture, collecting samples of TV and radio, social media, and other ludicrous crap.

This podcast is a collection of REAL cultural artefacts gathered by BOMT as it farts across alternative universes.

A new scripted sketch comedy series in the form of a podcast aimed at adults with a dark sense of humour who enjoy satire and absurdist comedy.

It is intended for mature audiences only and contains explicit language and content and is not for the faint of heart or easily offended

“As we gain a higher understanding of stupidity, we gain a deeper understanding ourselves.”