**Guest Bio:**

Meet Kacey Stephens, a seasoned and certified Life Coach, Reiki Master & Teacher, and Intuitive Psychic Medium with over 35 years of experience in wellness and fitness. Certified in 200-hour Yoga, Kacey has been teaching dance, cardio, sculpt, and Pilates since the age of 15. Her extensive background also includes a BA in Psychology, which she integrates into her holistic approach to coaching.

Kacey empowers individuals on their wellness journeys by blending powerful coaching distinctions, intuition, energy work, and spiritual connection. She helps clients release past narratives and embrace new perspectives to achieve their true desires. As an advocate for authenticity and gratitude, Kacey continuously evolves through her own growth and development with daily practices in meditation, reiki, and yoga, keeps current with her trainings, and immerses herself in the most up to date techniques in holistic wellness

This August, Kacey is co-launching Shed65 in Annapolis, MD.
𝗦𝗛𝗘𝗗 is dedicated to stress reduction and holistic wellness, offering infrared saunas, a stately cold plunge and salt cave, plus a variety of classes to promote mind, body, and spirit health. Kacey will be heading up and leading classes and programs geared to enrich and elevate people’s lives, not only in the Annapolis Community, but hopefully beyond.

For more on Kacey's services, reach out to her at kstephens@zenfullyyours.com or follow her on Instagram at @energeticmuse. Stay updated on Shed65 at www.shed65.com.

**Favorite Quote:**
"Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny." — Lao Tzu

Her favorite Mantra jewelry:
www.katiadesigns.com
Use coupon code 112 to receive 15% off today!

Katie expresses trepidation over this episode being “bloody knuckles”

Katie is apprehensive about her privacy being too exposed in this episode. The dance with having a very public social media account and still having boundaries around her private life.

The point of this episode is how our common experiences in relationships have knitted us together as friends. And that everything is a lesson.

WTF about how we keep learning the same lessons over and over and over in relationships.

Katie shares her marriage story. Her relationship with her ex husband is really great. Uncommonly good. She’s proud of the friendship she has with him.

Dating post divorce. Katie was bitter, angry, sad. And her life in the years after weren’t her finest.

Three separate boyfriends that were several years each. All long distance relationships which felt a little safer because they weren’t in “her space.”

Ignoring red flags left and right. Sacrificing precious time with her kids. Her guilt is so heavy.

The live and learn in it is - no relationship is perfect but it should be better than to have to say daily, “no relationship is perfect.” Recognizing at what point its truly unhealthy and a dealbreaker.

Discussing the versions of narcissism. And how that presents in various ways and what does it mean to “draw that to ourselves.” Why do we keep drawing the same into our life?

Unpacking the dynamics of experiencing the narcissistic wheel. Love bombing… to the crazies… to the ending… back to the bomb.

Karen is the most beautiful friend because there was never any shame in coming to her saying - it all fell apart AGAIN… and she never said “I told you so.”

That is LOVE.

Another beautiful piece of their friendship is Karen’s “How would you like me to respond…” answer to a cry for help. The hard truth? Or do you want me to make you feel better? Coach? Or cheerleader?

Katie’s Overall lessons in relationship history…

Lesson #1 - People pleasing and boundaries - what are we learning?

Lesson #2 - Believe who someone is - the FIRST time they show you.

Lesson #3 - When you RETURN to a known unhealthy relationship - you must admit to yourself - there’s something IN IT FOR YOU. You need to confront that if you want to not have it repeat.

The gift at the end of it all was Katies friendship with Karen. Our similarities bonded us together. Karen held Katies hand through the last few years from a place of experience and acceptance.

The growth is in sharing and moving out of the shame of it all and into the place that we are not alone.

Karen discusses her tumultuous childhood which led her to make life altering decisions in her adult relationships. With 3 kids and a spouse in prison, Karen shares what kept her going and how finding love again wasn’t quite what it seemed.

• Are you responsible for recognizing red flags? Karen speaks to the pain she experienced as a kid and how she navigates life overall-it makes you who you are. We’re a product of our experiences and bring you to NOW and to be thankful regardless.
• Growing up one of 4 children, living in an alcoholic household which included many levels of abuse. Her parents divorced when she was 9 but adolescence was no better.
• Karen describes being on her own and working regularly to buy the necessities including shampoo. No AC quite often, free lunch tickets and lived in a battered women’s shelter multiple times.
• Karen’s ability to put multiple outfits together came from trying to stretch her wardrobe and not look like a poor kid. She made a career out of her ability to show up looking the part.
• Knowing her childhood was temporary was something she was counting on because she wanted something more. More stability, more peace.
• Abuse was rampant in her home between being physically abused as well as mentally, emotionally abused.
• Karen’s mother was checked out emotionally and due to always working to survive, just wasn’t around. Sexual abuse was committed by a neighbor as a young child.
• Karen married the “safe” choice who’d never had a drink and was what seemed to be a nurturer/hunter/gatherer type personality, hoping to choose someone who would build a life with her.
• A white-collar crime put Karen’s husband in prison for 5 years, leaving her alone with 3 kids aged 4, 5, 13. Many months behind on rent, a car that was repossessed and selling most of her possessions was the new reality.
• No time to deal with her own depression because of loss (her BIL, father, brother), Karen took on multiple jobs to make it work.
• Karen then met a narcissist who appeared to be everything she needed when in fact he was 100% fake who was married 2x prior. Believing SHE was the one to love him better and SHE understood him. He was in fact, NOT that person.
• Dating is off the table, Karen has had 3 relationships and is retired from dating! She’s convinced that people are NOT who they say they are. Katie is convinced that the only way to really know someone is when life gets hard. Who shows up then? The person who shows up when things are difficult are the REAL personalities in the relationship.
• Feeling a sense of shame from being in a second marriage that then failed, Karen still looks back with a bit of a struggle because she made a life in spite of what she went through.
• Your life is YOUR fault. You choose everything you have in this moment.