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Not the Christmas Story
- A Comedic Christmas Caper
- Narrated by: John Spencer
- Length: 32 mins
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Not the Christmas Story
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Publisher's summary
The Christmas story Monty Python-style.
The gospel according to St. John Spencer:
And there were shoppers abiding in Audible, keeping watch over their purchases by night. And lo, the cover of this book came upon their scrolling, and the humor of the book shone round about them, and they were sore afraid of spending more money.
And the cover said unto them, “Fear not: For, behold, I bring you good tidings of great laughter, which shall be to all purchasers of this book.”
“For unto you is middle-aged this day in the country of England a comedian, who is John Spencer.”
“And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shalt find this Christmas story wrapped in British wit, lying on a page.”
And it came to pass, that the shoppers said one to another, “Let us go now even unto the checkout and purchase this book which hath come to be written, which the cover hath made known unto us.”
And they came with credit cards and found the audiobook lying in their basket.
And when they had listened to it, they made it known abroad via their positive reviews. And all who read these reviews didst also purchase this book.
And the author treasured all these purchases in his bank account.
Sadly, not by the real Monty Python team. Sorry about that. But the author is British.
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- By: Charles Spurgeon
- Narrated by: Charles Spurgeon
- Length: 1 hr and 34 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 39
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story5 out of 5 stars 29
Charles Spurgeon was England's best-known preacher for most of the second half of the nineteenth century. He frequently preached to audiences numbering more than 10,000, without the help of microphones and speakers. Listen to performances of two of Spurgeon's sermons: "All Joy in All Trials," and "Daily Blessings for God's People."
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best message I have ever heard. Has comforted me s
- By Sup on 07-17-16
By: Charles Spurgeon
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Decoding the Prophet Jeremiah
- What an Ancient Prophet Says About Today
- By: Mark Biltz
- Narrated by: Mike Lenz
- Length: 5 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 30
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story5 out of 5 stars 28
This book is a clarion call to all believers. We need to see the bigger picture: It is not about us but about God’s heart and God’s kingdom. God is looking for warriors who are about advancing his kingdom by storming the gates of hell and setting his sons and daughters free from the clutches of the greatest narcissist of all time.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Does Not Disappoint... Intense!!
- By Grateful Lady on 08-28-22
By: Mark Biltz
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John Bunyan's Last Sermon
- By: John Bunyan
- Narrated by: Glenn Hascall
- Length: 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 19
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 19
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Story5 out of 5 stars 18
It was the summer of 1668 when John Bunyan preached his last sermon. Bunyan is most noted for spending time in prison and for writing one of the most popular books in history, Pilgrim’s Progress. His life lessons culminate in this final sermon. Narrated by Glenn Hascall.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Short but well said.
- By JP on 03-24-16
By: John Bunyan
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65 Signs of the Times
- By: David Ridges
- Narrated by: David Ridges
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 275
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 231
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 229
The return of the long-lost ten tribes, a new Jerusalem being built, heavenly messengers from beyond this life.... It may sound like fantasy, but according to the scriptures, all of these things will really come to pass before our Savior comes again. In fact, these signs were designed by the Lord to alert true believers to his imminent return. The question is, Will you recognize the signs?
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1 out of 5 stars
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This is not the book. It's a fireside talk
- By Trevor T. on 07-24-15
By: David Ridges
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The Decameron
- By: Giovanni Boccaccio
- Narrated by: Simon Russell Beale, Gunnar Cauthery, Alison Pettitt, and others
- Length: 28 hrs and 5 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 231
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 201
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 202
The Decameron is one of the greatest literary works of the Middle Ages. Ten young people have fled the terrible effects of the Black Death in Florence and, in an idyllic setting, tell a series of brilliant stories, by turns humorous, bawdy, tragic and provocative. This celebration of physical and sexual vitality is Boccaccio's answer to the sublime other-worldliness of Dante's Divine Comedy.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not Up to the Usual Naxos Standard
- By John on 11-15-17
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The Arabian Nights
- By: Andrew Lang - translator
- Narrated by: Suehyla El Attar
- Length: 11 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 168
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 150
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Story4 out of 5 stars 150
Full of mischief, valor, ribaldry, and romance, The Arabian Nights has enthralled readers for centuries. These are the tales that saved the life of Scheherazade, whose husband, the king, executed each of his wives after a single night of marriage. Beginning an enchanting story each evening, Scheherazade always withheld the ending: A thousand and one nights later, her life was spared forever.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Not unabridged Burton--this is Lang
- By Richard and Diana Chicago on 06-25-12
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Hot White Heist 2
- By: Adam Goldman
- Narrated by: Bowen Yang, Jane Lynch, Cynthia Nixon, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 38 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 335
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 326
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 326
Two years after successfully melting down the top secret sperm bank under the Space Needle, the CLITO collective (Community of Lesbians Inclusive To Others) is thriving on their newly acquired private island, Lesbos 2. All is well in their queer utopia. Or is it? Investigative reporter Sarah Keebler (Sarah Steele) is piecing together the crew's previous heist for her bombshell true-crime podcast–and getting dangerously close to the truth.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Love Bowen Yang
- By Sheena Bambus on 03-15-24
By: Adam Goldman
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 213,708
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 193,363
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Story5 out of 5 stars 192,392
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
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Yellow Face
- A Semi-autobiographical Comedy
- By: David Henry Hwang
- Narrated by: Daniel Dae Kim (CK), Ashley Park, Wendell Pierce, and others
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 97
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 76
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 76
Winner of an Obie and a finalist for the Pulitzer Prize, and directed by Tony nominee Leigh Silverman, Yellow Face is as timely as ever, wrestling with issues of cultural appropriation, complicity, and artistic freedom. It’s brought to life in this audio-only revival by a stunning all-star cast (many playing themselves) led by Daniel Dae Kim.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Funny, great audible performance, and good dialogue.
- By Ed the Canadian on 05-04-24
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Cut and Thirst
- A Short Story
- By: Margaret Atwood
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 1 hr and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall3 out of 5 stars 65
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 63
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Story3 out of 5 stars 62
Myrna, Leonie, and Chrissy meet every Thursday to sample fine cheeses, to reminisce about their former lives as professors, and lately, to muse about murder. Decades ago, a vicious cabal of male poets contrived—quite publicly and successfully—to undermine the writing career, confidence, and health of their dear friend Fern. Now, after Fern has taken a turn for the worse, her three old friends decide that it’s finally time to strike back—in secret, of course, since Fern is far too gentle to approve of a vendetta.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Smart women
- By Janice on 05-18-24
By: Margaret Atwood
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,644
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,669
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,644
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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4 out of 5 stars
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne
- Narrated by: Kate McKinnon, Emily Lynne, Tim Gunn, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 17,253
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 15,722
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Story4 out of 5 stars 15,656
Heads Will Roll is an Audible Original from Saturday Night Live star Kate McKinnon and her cocreator/costar (and real-life sister) Emily Lynne. Produced by Broadway Video, this is not an audiobook - it’s a 10-episode, star-studded audio comedy that features performances from Meryl Streep, Tim Gunn, Peter Dinklage, Queer Eye’s Fab Five, and so many more. Please note: This content is not for kids.
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5 out of 5 stars
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More like this please
- By Anon893 on 05-03-19
By: Kate McKinnon, and others
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Napoleon's Hemorrhoids…And Other Small Events That Changed History
- By: Phil Mason
- Narrated by: LJ Ganser
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,114
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 989
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Story4 out of 5 stars 985
Hilarious, fascinating, and a roller coaster of dizzying, historical what-ifs, Napoleon's Hemorrhoids is a potpourri for serious historians and casual history buffs. In one of Phil Mason's many revelations, you'll learn that Communist jets were two minutes away from opening fire on American planes during the Cuban missile crisis, when they had to turn back as they were running out of fuel. You'll discover that before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon's painful hemorrhoids prevented him from mounting his horse to survey the battlefield.
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3 out of 5 stars
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They just throw the facts too fast
- By Concerned_llama on 12-11-20
By: Phil Mason
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 55,762
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,240
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 49,984
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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Green Wing: Resuscitated
- By: Victoria Pile, James Henry, Oriane Messina, and others
- Narrated by: Oliver Chris, Olivia Colman, Pippa Haywood, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 17 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 32
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 30
They’re back! The all-star cast multi-award-winning cult hit comedy returns, with more surreal goings-on in the lives and loves of the doctors and staff at East Hampton Hospital (warning: contains very little medical content).
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5 out of 5 stars
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Wonderful to hear these voices again
- By LucilleB on 05-03-24
By: Victoria Pile, and others
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