• How to Know a Person

  • The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen
  • By: David Brooks
  • Narrated by: David Brooks
  • Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
  • 4.7 out of 5 stars (1,306 ratings)

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How to Know a Person

By: David Brooks
Narrated by: David Brooks
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Publisher's summary

NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A practical, heartfelt guide to the art of truly knowing another person in order to foster deeper connections at home, at work, and throughout our lives—from the author of The Road to Character and The Second Mountain

As David Brooks observes, “There is one skill that lies at the heart of any healthy person, family, school, community organization, or society: the ability to see someone else deeply and make them feel seen—to accurately know another person, to let them feel valued, heard, and understood.”

And yet we humans don’t do this well. All around us are people who feel invisible, unseen, misunderstood. In How to Know a Person, Brooks sets out to help us do better, posing questions that are essential for all of us: If you want to know a person, what kind of attention should you cast on them? What kind of conversations should you have? What parts of a person’s story should you pay attention to?

Driven by his trademark sense of curiosity and his determination to grow as a person, Brooks draws from the fields of psychology and neuroscience and from the worlds of theater, philosophy, history, and education to present a welcoming, hopeful, integrated approach to human connection. How to Know a Person helps readers become more understanding and considerate toward others, and to find the joy that comes from being seen. Along the way it offers a possible remedy for a society that is riven by fragmentation, hostility, and misperception.

The act of seeing another person, Brooks argues, is profoundly creative: How can we look somebody in the eye and see something large in them, and in turn, see something larger in ourselves? How to Know a Person is for anyone searching for connection, and yearning to be understood.

©2023 David Brooks (P)2023 Random House Audio

What listeners say about How to Know a Person

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A Hug As We Begin 2024

As we turn the corner and put to rest 2023, we approach all of the events ahead of us for 2024, with a certain amount of fear and anxiety. This is a wonderful book of wisdom from David Brooks that will help us approach those that we meet with heart, regardless of their point of view, regardless of whether they vote like you or not. We have to stick it out as a civilization and this book is a good how to manual for being able to do just that.  highly recommended! I will listen to it as a second time.

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fabulous to experience

A great treat, read by the author . I'll revisit this one. highly recommend

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Thanks for your immense effort and sharing.

The key question now is how can I contribute to improving the moral skill development to make a difference in the lives we now live? I plan to re-read this book as many times as it takes for me to develop a plan. Then I will start sharing with anybody who will listen.

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So clearly helpful

Love this author and this book. Gives so many clear easy to use tips to improve relationships. Thank you for this.

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Awesome!

Such useful information and encouragement to grow! I couldn’t put it down and I plan to reread it more than once.

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Illuminating and very helpful

I actually stopped the recording to take notes and will definitively listen to it again.

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Learning how to reconnect

This is wonderful book which teaches how to gain insight into others but also with oneself. I am sure that I shall refer to it from time to time in the future.

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Excellent!

Great book, highly recommend. I found it very insightful and was surprised by how much it actually covered.

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Already helping me love other people better!

I am touched by David’s vulnerability.  Helps me to be vulnerable with those I care about. 

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An enlightened journey into ourself and others

David gently takes the reader/listener through his own personal experience and interactions with others that make each story come to life and relatable. I will buy several copies of this book to give it to people I love. David is so open and generous it inspires me to rethink how I move through life. Thank you David Brooks for giving me this gift.

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