-
How to Be a Beta Male
- Narrated by: Michael Fenton Stevens
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Prime members: New to Audible?Get 2 free audiobooks during trial.
How to Be a Beta Male
Buy for $24.30
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
Publisher's summary
From rom coms to wrestling and fatherhood to fist fights, Robert Crampton's How to Be a Beta Male is a brilliantly funny and sometimes moving insight into being a modern-day bloke.
Robert Crampton has been writing his Beta Male column for The Times since 2001. A much-loved weekly insight into modern masculinity - whatever that might mean - Beta Male strives to unlock the secrets of contemporary relationships in all their frequent glory, occasional frustration and ongoing complexity. While by his own admission totally failing in this task, Crampton is at any rate amusing as he goes about his business, as his legions of loyal fans would attest.
How to Be a Beta Male is a carefully curated selection, bursting with observational nuggets on the minutiae of daily domestics and disasters in the Crampton household and offering the very best of a 16-year-long account of what it is to be a beta male married to an alpha female.
From his attempts at DIY to disciplining their children to trying once in a while to put his foot down to getting involved in a punch-up in the street in her defence, Robert continues to fail to impress his wife but always delights his fans.
It's a very smart, extremely funny and yet surprisingly sensitive exploration of the trials, tribulations - and, ultimately, triumphs - of not being young, free and single.
More from the same
Related to this topic
-
George Orwell’s 1984
- An Audible Original adaptation
- By: George Orwell, Joe White - adaptation
- Narrated by: Andrew Garfield, Cynthia Erivo, Andrew Scott, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,076
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 3,908
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,907
It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
-
Home Is Where the Bodies Are
- By: Jeneva Rose
- Narrated by: January LaVoy, Cassandra Campbell, Brittany Pressley, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 930
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 911
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 911
After their mother passes, three estranged siblings reunite to sort out her estate. Beth, the oldest, never left home. She stayed with her mom, caring for her until the very end. Nicole, the middle child, has been kept at arm’s length due to her ongoing battle with a serious drug addiction. Michael, the youngest, lives out of state and hasn’t been back to their small Wisconsin town since their father ran out on them seven years before. While going through their parent’s belongings, the siblings stumble upon a collection of home videos and decide to revisit those happier memories.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Not what I expected
- By Natasha A on 05-22-24
By: Jeneva Rose
-
The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 40,595
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 33,574
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 33,155
The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Fred271 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
-
The Holy Bible: King James Version
- The Old and New Testaments
- By: King James Bible
- Narrated by: Scott Brick, Prentice Onayemi, Ellen Archer, and others
- Length: 82 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,016
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 807
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 800
This newer edition of the King James Bible published in 1769 is usually preferred by most that read it over the older 1611 version. This 1769 edition is highly sought after due to being more reader/listener friendly than the 1611 since many typos were fixed.... We hope your new audio bible will go everywhere with you and be a blessing for years to come.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Very Good
- By José de Ribera on 12-17-20
By: King James Bible
-
Dietrich
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,264
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,175
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,175
It’s the summer of ’77 in New York City, and the only thing more unnerving than the scorching heatwave is the rampant murder, leaving washed-up homicide detective Richard Dietrich on edge. When Dietrich investigates a brutal mob hit the brass doesn’t want him to solve, he goes from phoning it in to getting in over his head. Caught up in a mysterious second homicide with an even more perplexing perpetrator, Dietrich starts to second guess his instincts—and his memory—as he searches for answers at the bottom of a bottle.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Haunting ending
- By Shirley Anderson on 04-21-24
By: Don Winslow
-
He Who Fights with Monsters 2
- A LitRPG Adventure (He Who Fights with Monsters, Book 2)
- By: Shirtaloon, Travis Deverell
- Narrated by: Heath Miller
- Length: 22 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 26,541
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 23,292
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 23,237
But Jason Asano is settling into his new life. Now, a contest draws young elites to the city of Greenstone to compete for a grand prize. Jason must gather a band of companions if he is to stand a chance against the best the world has to offer. While the young adventurers are caught up in competition, the city leaders deal with revelations of betrayal as a vast and terrible enemy is revealed. Although Jason seems uninvolved, he has unknowingly crossed the enemy’s path before.
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Contrary to common reviews
- By Karen on 05-21-21
By: Shirtaloon, and others
-
George Orwell’s 1984
- An Audible Original adaptation
- By: George Orwell, Joe White - adaptation
- Narrated by: Andrew Garfield, Cynthia Erivo, Andrew Scott, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 4,076
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 3,908
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 3,907
It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
-
Home Is Where the Bodies Are
- By: Jeneva Rose
- Narrated by: January LaVoy, Cassandra Campbell, Brittany Pressley, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 930
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 911
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 911
After their mother passes, three estranged siblings reunite to sort out her estate. Beth, the oldest, never left home. She stayed with her mom, caring for her until the very end. Nicole, the middle child, has been kept at arm’s length due to her ongoing battle with a serious drug addiction. Michael, the youngest, lives out of state and hasn’t been back to their small Wisconsin town since their father ran out on them seven years before. While going through their parent’s belongings, the siblings stumble upon a collection of home videos and decide to revisit those happier memories.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Not what I expected
- By Natasha A on 05-22-24
By: Jeneva Rose
-
The Art of War
- By: Sun Tzu
- Narrated by: Aidan Gillen
- Length: 1 hr and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 40,595
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 33,574
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 33,155
The 13 chapters of The Art of War, each devoted to one aspect of warfare, were compiled by the high-ranking Chinese military general, strategist, and philosopher Sun-Tzu. In spite of its battlefield specificity, The Art of War has found new life in the modern age, with leaders in fields as wide and far-reaching as world politics, human psychology, and corporate strategy finding valuable insight in its timeworn words.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
The actual book The Art of War, not a commentary
- By Fred271 on 12-31-19
By: Sun Tzu
-
The Holy Bible: King James Version
- The Old and New Testaments
- By: King James Bible
- Narrated by: Scott Brick, Prentice Onayemi, Ellen Archer, and others
- Length: 82 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,016
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 807
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 800
This newer edition of the King James Bible published in 1769 is usually preferred by most that read it over the older 1611 version. This 1769 edition is highly sought after due to being more reader/listener friendly than the 1611 since many typos were fixed.... We hope your new audio bible will go everywhere with you and be a blessing for years to come.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Very Good
- By José de Ribera on 12-17-20
By: King James Bible
-
Dietrich
- By: Don Winslow
- Narrated by: Ed Harris
- Length: 1 hr and 11 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,264
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,175
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,175
It’s the summer of ’77 in New York City, and the only thing more unnerving than the scorching heatwave is the rampant murder, leaving washed-up homicide detective Richard Dietrich on edge. When Dietrich investigates a brutal mob hit the brass doesn’t want him to solve, he goes from phoning it in to getting in over his head. Caught up in a mysterious second homicide with an even more perplexing perpetrator, Dietrich starts to second guess his instincts—and his memory—as he searches for answers at the bottom of a bottle.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Haunting ending
- By Shirley Anderson on 04-21-24
By: Don Winslow
-
He Who Fights with Monsters 2
- A LitRPG Adventure (He Who Fights with Monsters, Book 2)
- By: Shirtaloon, Travis Deverell
- Narrated by: Heath Miller
- Length: 22 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 26,541
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 23,292
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 23,237
But Jason Asano is settling into his new life. Now, a contest draws young elites to the city of Greenstone to compete for a grand prize. Jason must gather a band of companions if he is to stand a chance against the best the world has to offer. While the young adventurers are caught up in competition, the city leaders deal with revelations of betrayal as a vast and terrible enemy is revealed. Although Jason seems uninvolved, he has unknowingly crossed the enemy’s path before.
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Contrary to common reviews
- By Karen on 05-21-21
By: Shirtaloon, and others
Love Books? You'll Love Audible.
Transform your day
Replace endless scrolling with endless listening. Chores can be fun.
Listen everywhere
Download titles to listen offline, wherever you are in the world.
Carry your entire Library
Your stories go where you go. Audiobooks don’t weigh a thing.
Listen and learn
Discover stories that can change your mind, your well-being, and your life.
Reach your reading goals
You can’t turn pages while you drive—but you can press play.
Find your niche
WIth thousands of titles to explore, there’s something for everyone.