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And Then They Stopped Talking to Me
- Making Sense of Middle School
- Narrado por: Judith Warner
- Duración: 7 h y 39 m
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Resumen del Editor
Through the stories of kids and parents in the middle-school trenches, a New York Times best-selling author reveals why these years are so painful, how parents unwittingly make them worse, and what we all need to do to grow up.
“As the parent of a middle schooler, I felt as if Judith Warner had peered into my life - and the lives of many of my patients. This is a gift to our kids and their future selves.” (Lori Gottlieb, author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone)
The French have a name for the uniquely hellish years between elementary school and high school: l’âge ingrat, or "the ugly age". Characterized by a perfect storm of developmental changes - physical, psychological, and social - the middle school years are a time of great distress for children and parents alike, marked by hurt, isolation, exclusion, competition, anxiety, and often outright cruelty. Some of this is inevitable; there are intrinsic challenges to early adolescence. But these years are harder than they need to be, and Judith Warner believes that adults are complicit.
With deep insight and compassion, Warner walks us through a new understanding of the role that middle school plays in all our lives. She argues that today's helicopter parents are overly concerned with status and achievement - in some ways a residual effect of their own middle-school experiences - and that this worsens the self-consciousness, self-absorption, and social "sorting" so typical of early adolescence.
Tracing a century of research on middle childhood and bringing together the voices of social scientists, psychologists, educators, and parents, Warner's book shows how adults can be moral role models for children, making them more empathetic, caring, and resilient. She encourages us to start treating middle schoolers as the complex people they are, holding them to high standards of kindness, and helping them see one another as more than "jocks and mean girls, nerds and sluts".
Part cultural critique and part call to action, this essential book unpacks one of life's most formative periods and shows how we can help our children not only survive it but thrive.
Reseñas de la Crítica
"As the parent of a middle schooler, I felt as if Warner had peered into my life - and the lives of many of my patients. With clarity, compassion, and insight, And Then They Stopped Talking to Me brilliantly captures the landscape of kids' experiences today and the psychological, familial, and cultural forces shaping them. Along the way, Warner debunks age-old myths and offers practical guidance that every parent can use. This is a gift to our kids and their future selves." (Lori Gottlieb, author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone)
"I don't know a single adult who did not feel alone, insecure, or deeply self-conscious in middle school. Warner puts the pieces of the puzzle together to show us just how not-alone we were - and gives us the knowledge to guide our children through one of the most painful moments of childhood." (Rachel Simmons, author of Odd Girl Out and Enough As She Is)
"If your child’s middle school journey is unraveling you, Warner’s new book is the one you need to read. She will give you the gift of perspective, along with a personal and scientific understanding of what is happening to your child. I have often advised parents not to allow themselves to be sucked back into middle school when they see their children’s distress or hear their war stories. But I had no guidebook to offer them. Now I do." (Michael G. Thompson, co-author of Raising Cain)
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Steve Biddulph's Raising Boys was a global phenomenon. The first book in a generation to look at boys' specific needs, parents loved its clarity and warm insights into their sons' inner world. But today, things have changed. It's girls that are in trouble. There has been a sudden and universal deterioration in girls' mental health, starting in primary school and devastating the teen years. Steve Biddulph's Raising Girls is both a guidebook and a call to arms for parents.
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Really helpful and Grounded
- De KFluke en 01-26-23
De: Steve Biddulph
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All the Rage
- Mothers, Fathers, and the Myth of Equal Partnership
- De: Darcy Lockman
- Narrado por: Abby Craden
- Duración: 8 h y 53 m
- Versión completa
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The inequity of domestic life is one of the most profound and perplexing conundrums of our time. In an era of seemingly unprecedented feminist activism, enlightenment, and change, data shows that one area of gender inequality stubbornly remains: the unequal amount of parental work that falls on women, no matter their class or professional status.
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Must read for men
- De Brooks Rainey Pearson en 06-12-19
De: Darcy Lockman
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Teach Your Children Well
- Parenting for Authentic Success
- De: Madeline Levine PhD
- Narrado por: Cassandra Campbell
- Duración: 10 h y 57 m
- Versión completa
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Parents, educators, and the media wring their hands about the plight of America's children and teens - soaring rates of emotional problems, limited coping skills, disengagement from learning - and yet there are ways to reverse these disheartening trends. Teach Your Children Well acknowledges that every parent wants successful children. However, until we are clearer about our core values and the parenting choices that are most likely to lead to authentic, and not superficial, success, we will continue to raise exhausted, externally driven, impaired children.
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I wish this book had been published years ago
- De AvidReader en 09-07-12
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Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue
- How to Raise Your Kids Free of Gender Stereotypes
- De: Christia Spears Brown PhD
- Narrado por: Stina Nielsen
- Duración: 8 h y 16 m
- Versión completa
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In this practical guide, developmental psychologist (and mother of two) Christia Spears Brown uses science-based research to show how over-dependence on gender can limit kids, making it harder for them to develop into unique individuals. With a humorous, fresh, and accessible perspective, Parenting Beyond Pink & Blue addresses all the issues that contemporary parents should consider - from gender-segregated birthday parties and schools to sports, sexualization, and emotional intelligence.
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Not a parenting guide but a description of norms.
- De Anonymous User en 08-15-20
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Bringing Up Girls
- Practical Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Women
- De: James C. Dobson
- Narrado por: James C. Dobson
- Duración: 11 h y 15 m
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Based on extensive research, and handled with Dr. Dobson's trademark down-to-earth approach, Bringing Up Girls will equip parents like you to face the challenges of raising your daughters to become healthy, happy, and successful women who overcome challenges specific to girls and women today and who ultimately excel in life.
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Solid concepts, poor presentation
- De honuhunter en 12-06-18
De: James C. Dobson
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Parenting by the Book
- Biblical Wisdom for Raising Your Child
- De: John Rosemond
- Narrado por: George W. Sarris
- Duración: 8 h y 21 m
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Picture respectful, responsible, obedient children who entertain themselves without television or video games, do their own homework, and have impeccable manners. A pie-in-the-sky fantasy? Not so, says family psychologist and best-selling author John Rosemond. Any parent who so desires can grow children who fit that description - happy, emotionally healthy children who honor their parents and their families with good behavior and do their best in school.
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Extremely Timely!
- De SimoneSJ en 07-15-21
De: John Rosemond
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Parenting the New Teen in the Age of Anxiety
- Raising Happy, Healthy Humans Ages 8 to 24
- De: Dr. John Duffy
- Narrado por: Anne Cross
- Duración: 7 h y 48 m
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No parent experienced their teen years the way that children do today. This guide provides strategies and tips for actively learning the world of our children.
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Every parent should read this!!
- De Kitty Kitty en 10-20-19
De: Dr. John Duffy
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Raising a Strong Daughter in a Toxic Culture
- 11 Steps to Keep Her Happy, Healthy, and Safe
- De: Meg Meeker
- Narrado por: Lisbeth Carol Keen
- Duración: 6 h y 56 m
- Versión completa
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Learn about the essential, complementary roles that mothers and fathers play; the dangers of social media - and how to help your daughter navigate them; what every daughter needs to know about God; how to launch your daughter into successful womanhood; and more.
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Should had read the details instead of the title.
- De Ms. Burke en 11-15-20
De: Meg Meeker
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The Wonder of Boys
- De: Michael Gurian
- Narrado por: Michael Gurian
- Duración: 3 h y 18 m
- Versión resumida
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What can parents, mentors, and educators do to shape boys into exceptional men? Michael Gurian, a respected therapist, storyteller, and recognized expert in family systems, explains the basic needs of every boy: a primary and extended family, a relationship with mother, father, and mentors, and support from his community.
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Great Book for Mothers and Fathers
- De Janine en 05-20-09
De: Michael Gurian
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The Sibling Effect
- What the Bonds among Brothers and Sisters Reveal about Us
- De: Jeffrey Kluger
- Narrado por: Pete Larkin
- Duración: 8 h y 56 m
- Versión completa
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Nobody affects us as deeply as our brothers and sisters - not parents, not children, not friends. From the time we - and they - are born, our siblings are our collaborators and co-conspirators, our role models and cautionary tales. They teach us how to resolve conflicts and how not to, how to conduct friendships and when to walk away.
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This is the only book I never finished
- De Rob en 06-25-12
De: Jeffrey Kluger
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Generation Me
- Why Today's Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled - and More Miserable Than Ever Before
- De: Jean M. Twenge PhD
- Narrado por: Randye Kaye
- Duración: 12 h y 20 m
- Versión completa
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In this provocative new book, psychologist and social commentator Dr. Jean Twenge documents the self-focus of what she calls "Generation Me" - people born in the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s. Dr. Twenge explores why her generation is tolerant, confident, open-minded, and ambitious but also cynical, depressed, lonely, and anxious. Dr. Twenge reveals how profoundly different today's young adults are - and makes controversial predictions about what the future holds for them and society as a whole.
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I mostly agree
- De David Hill en 05-25-20
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Attack of the Teenage Brain
- Understanding and Supporting the Weird and Wonderful Adolescent Learner
- De: John Medina
- Narrado por: John Medina
- Duración: 6 h y 16 m
- Versión completa
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In accessible language and with periodic references to Star Trek, motorcycle daredevils, and near-classic movies of the '80s, developmental molecular biologist John Medina explores the neurological and evolutionary factors that drive teenage behavior and can affect both achievement and engagement. Then he proposes a research-supported counterattack: a bold redesign of educational practices and learning environments to deliberately develop teens' cognitive capacity to manage their emotions, plan, prioritize, and focus.
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Wish I knew years ago
- De John Wernecke en 05-30-18
De: John Medina
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How to Be Sad
- Everything I’ve Learned About Getting Happier by Being Sad
- De: Helen Russell
- Narrado por: Helen Russell
- Duración: 10 h y 28 m
- Versión completa
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Helen Russell has researched sadness from the inside out for her entire life. Her earliest memory is of the day her sister died. Her parents divorced soon after, and her mother didn’t receive the help she needed to grieve. Coping with her own emotional turmoil — including struggles with body image and infertility — she’s endured professional and personal setbacks as well as relationships that have imploded in truly spectacular ways. Even the things that brought her the greatest joy — like eventually becoming a parent — are fraught with challenges.
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More an self biography
- De Jaime Murillo en 04-27-24
De: Helen Russell
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Your Turn
- How to Be an Adult
- De: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Narrado por: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Duración: 20 h y 21 m
- Versión completa
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What does it mean to be an adult? In the 20th century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.
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Not the book that was advertised
- De M. Rogers en 04-13-21
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Anxiety among mothers is a growing but largely unrecognized crisis. In the transition to motherhood and the years that follow, countless women suffer from overwhelming feelings of fear, grief, and obsession that do not fit neatly within the outmoded category of “postpartum depression.” These women soon discover that there is precious little support or time for their care, even as expectations about what mothers should do and be continue to rise.
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We are surrounded by choices. If we want to watch a movie, we have multiple platforms we can choose from. If we grow tired of a friend or conversation, we leave them on read. It's never been easier to tune out and make a switch when something doesn't go perfectly or when we are offended. It's easy to cancel something from our lives when it comes to technology, television shows, or choices of food and drinks. But what about canceling friends or family members when we are disappointed or offended by them?
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Are relationships worth the hassle...Yes!
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Behind Closed Doors
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There are many jokes about the difficulties of raising a teenager, but beneath these jokes parents are hurting and feeling helpless while their teens are navigating extraordinary cultural challenges unlike anything faced by previous generations. Teens are feeling more isolated, anxious, and depressed. But how can we help them effectively navigate social challenges when we don't have the social skills to communicate authentically with dignity and compassion? How do we create safe spaces in a seemingly unsafe world?
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Must read for parents!
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What Do You Say?
- How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home
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William Stixrud, PhD, and Ned Johnson have 60 years combined experience talking to kids one-on-one, and the most common question they get when out speaking to parents and educators is: What do you say? While many adults understand the importance and power of the philosophies behind the books that dominate the parenting bestseller list, parents are often left wondering how to put those concepts into action. Johnson and Stixrud show how to engage in respectful and effective dialogue, beginning with defining and demonstrating the basic principles of listening and speaking.
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Actionable Advice
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No Time to Panic
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Matt Gutman can tell you the precise moment that his life was upended, even if he can’t quite remember it. Reporting live in January 2020, Gutman found himself in the throes of an on-air panic attack—and not for the first time. But Gutman’s January 2020 broadcast was noteworthy for all the wrong reasons. Mid-panic he would misstate the facts of a story, a blunder that led to a month-long suspension. It was a wake-up call. Gutman’s panic attacks were too much for him to bear in secret. He needed help. So begins the author's personal journey into the science and treatment of panic attacks.
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Very informative, very compelling
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Anxiety among mothers is a growing but largely unrecognized crisis. In the transition to motherhood and the years that follow, countless women suffer from overwhelming feelings of fear, grief, and obsession that do not fit neatly within the outmoded category of “postpartum depression.” These women soon discover that there is precious little support or time for their care, even as expectations about what mothers should do and be continue to rise.
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tedious and doesn't say anything meaningful
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Push Back
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We are surrounded by choices. If we want to watch a movie, we have multiple platforms we can choose from. If we grow tired of a friend or conversation, we leave them on read. It's never been easier to tune out and make a switch when something doesn't go perfectly or when we are offended. It's easy to cancel something from our lives when it comes to technology, television shows, or choices of food and drinks. But what about canceling friends or family members when we are disappointed or offended by them?
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There are many jokes about the difficulties of raising a teenager, but beneath these jokes parents are hurting and feeling helpless while their teens are navigating extraordinary cultural challenges unlike anything faced by previous generations. Teens are feeling more isolated, anxious, and depressed. But how can we help them effectively navigate social challenges when we don't have the social skills to communicate authentically with dignity and compassion? How do we create safe spaces in a seemingly unsafe world?
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What Do You Say?
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As a young, single mother, Sara Schulting Kranz discovered her path to forgiveness and healing from the scars of sexual abuse and the trauma of an unexpected divorce started with a daily practice of actively embracing the power and beauty of nature. Along the way, Sara learned a key lesson that to heal from anything you must walk through it on your own terms.
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A self dive into self love!
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Rookie Mistakes
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Raised in a devoutly Catholic home, Kelly Bandas spent her entire childhood trying hard not to tick off “the man” or the Lord. And for the most part, she crushed it. But as she got older and began to navigate what it looked like to truly live in a world where gender roles, race, and politics weren’t always so black and white, Kelly realized that her former worldview was beginning to feel like that pair of Forever 21 jeans that used to glide effortlessly over her hips but now required a lot of stretching and acrobatic maneuvering to shimmy into place. And she’s not alone.
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Great read!
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I Have Something to Say
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In 2010, award-winning journalist John Bowe learned that his cousin Bill, a longtime extreme recluse living in his parents' basement, had, at the age of 59, overcome a lifetime of shyness and isolation - and gotten happily married. Bill credited his turnaround to Toastmasters, the world's largest organization devoted to teaching the art of public speaking.
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Excellent Edu-tainment for Public Speaking
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De: John Bowe
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The Big Thing
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Whether it's the great American novel or a groundbreaking new app, many people want to create a Big Thing, but finding the motivation to get started, let alone complete the work, can be daunting. In The Big Thing, New York Times business writer and editor Phyllis Korkki combines real-life stories, science, and insights from her own experience to illuminate the factors that drive people to complete big creative projects - and the obstacles that threaten to derail success.
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More memoir than self-help
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How to Be Alive
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- Narrado por: Colin Beavan
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In How to Be Alive, Beavan shares his insights on finding the path that's right for you. Drawing on everything from classic literature and philosophy to current science, and combining that with his own experiences alongside those of the many people he has met along the way, Colin explores a broad array of transformational lifestyle adjustments - small and large - that offer security and meaning in a world confronted by ecological crises, economic upheaval, and ongoing war and social injustice.
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Hugely upbeat and full of practical ideas
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Take Back Your Power
- 10 New Rules for Women at Work
- De: Deborah Liu, Sheryl Sandberg - foreword
- Narrado por: Deborah Liu
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As a woman in Silicon Valley who worked her way to the top of the corporate ladder—she's a former VP at Facebook and the current president and CEO of Ancestry—Deborah Liu knows firsthand the challenges and obstacles in the workplace that keep the deck stacked against women in the workplace...and the ways to overcome them. For every woman who grew up competing on the uneven playing field, who is told she is too aggressive, assertive, dramatic, or emotional, this book is the battle cry you need to learn to thrive within the system that exists today.
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Transformational
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De: Deborah Liu, y otros
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It's Not Over
- Leaving Behind Disappointment and Learning to Dream Again
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- Narrado por: Joshua Gagnon, Bill Russell - foreword, Henry O. Arnold - afterword
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Pursuing a dream is essential to living a life with purpose. Yet we often bury our burning desires and dreams deep in our hearts because it seems as if there’s no way we can accomplish them. In It’s Not Over, pastor Joshua Gagnon, founder of the Next Level Church network, reminds us that we were born to dream - and to dream big. In fact, our dreams have the power to shape our lives.
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Amazing listen
- De Sharon Crawford en 05-30-24
De: Joshua Gagnon
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The Multiplication Effect
- Building a Leadership Pipeline that Solves Your Leadership Shortage
- De: Mac Lake
- Narrado por: Tom Parks
- Duración: 5 h y 32 m
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Do you wish you had more qualified, committed, and mission-oriented leaders in your church to share the ministry workload? Do you have a passion for cultivating the God-given leadership gifts in others? Most pastors say that the need to identify and develop leaders is critical to the health and growth of their church, yet most churches do not have an intentional plan for doing this.
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So much practical help for a growing church!
- De April Flowers en 06-30-22
De: Mac Lake
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Start with Your People
- The Daily Decision That Changes Everything
- De: Brian Dixon, Ruth Soukup - foreword
- Narrado por: Lauren Berst - foreword, Brian Dixon
- Duración: 6 h y 38 m
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It can be easy to become task-oriented, focusing on the goals ahead of us and checking off our to-do lists rather than focusing on the people in our lives. Entrepreneur and business coach Brian Dixon set out to discover the secret to living a life that matters and finding work you love. In Start with Your People, Brian shares principles, tips, and personal stories to help you maximize the most important resource to succeed in both life and calling: relationships. Join Brian on a journey to discover the people-first mindset that changes everything.
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Read this book!
- De Bradley en 10-11-19
De: Brian Dixon, y otros
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Twenty-Two
- Letters to a Young Woman Searching for Meaning
- De: Allison Trowbridge
- Narrado por: Niki Taylor
- Duración: 6 h y 46 m
- Versión completa
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Narración:
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Over the course of 22 letters, author Allison Trowbridge addresses a wide range of practical issues and ties them to larger concerns such as identity, loss, social impact as a lifestyle, wisdom in the ordinary moments, and the profound way God’s work is realized in how we live every day. Subtly weaving in today’s pressing social concerns - from poverty in our neighborhoods to human trafficking across the globe - Twenty-Two will inspire a greater sense of mission and a passion to live more fully as young women embark on their own remarkable journeys.
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Unashamed
- Drop the Baggage, Pick Up Your Freedom, Fulfill Your Destiny
- De: Christine Caine
- Narrado por: Jay O'Shea
- Duración: 5 h y 57 m
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General
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Narración:
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Shame can take on many forms. It hides in the shadows of the most successful, confident and high-achieving woman who struggles with balancing her work and children, as well as in the heart of the broken, abused and downtrodden woman who has been told that she will never amount to anything. Shame hides in plain sight and can hold us back in ways we do not realize. But Christine Caine wants listeners to know something: We can all be free.
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Great book, boring narrated.
- De The Book Hound en 05-18-16
De: Christine Caine
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The Second Happy
- Seven Practices to Make Your Marriage Better than Your Honeymoon
- De: Kevin Myers, Marcia Myers, Charles Wetzel - contributor
- Narrado por: Kevin Myers, Marcia Myers
- Duración: 5 h y 51 m
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Nearly every marriage starts out happy, and if we're honest, nearly every marriage at some point becomes unhappy. Is there a solution? Kevin and Marcia Myers, married for 37 years through nearly every challenge a couple can face, emphatically say yes. Rooted in Scripture and contemporary insights from the Myers' marriage, as well as real stories from other couples, this revelatory book shows how any marriage can regain depth, meaning and, yes, happiness.
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Worth a Read for anyone at any point of your relationship
- De Jessica en 10-31-21
De: Kevin Myers, y otros
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Lo que los oyentes dicen sobre And Then They Stopped Talking to Me
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- nick zebrowski
- 05-29-24
Not a how to guide…
If you are looking for a book to give you answers around how to deal with pre-teens this isn’t it.
What it is… is a well researched and in depth history explaining how our culture has created the preteen. There is a lot of good information here to educate yourself so you can be better prepared when dealing with these years.
But if you want a detailed instruction guide. Look elsewhere
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- KATHRYN DI
- 07-09-20
Only thing I've read that has helped JHS trauma
I actually had to stop listening to this book for several weeks because it felt so uncomfortable to re-experience junior high school feelings--but was just able to finish it. It was ultimately healing. Warner nailed it when she explains that that life stage caused lifelong trauma in adults but that they have left it unprocessed and unquestioned. Her book helps one do the thing that helps - reframe what happened, reframe who you thought you were, and as a result reframe who you are. She perceptively blames bad American junior high behavior on the values of the larger society--children of that age are not inevitably programmed to be morally reprehensible. Believe it or not, the idea that things didn't have to be the way they were, that the kids' personalities and social positioning behaviors weren't fixed in stone, that the me that is descended from that junior high self wasn't and is not fixed in stone, is a new idea. It allows empathy for people fixed in memory as enemies and empathy for a newly discovered and less flattering version of one's junior high self.
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- P. Stein
- 08-04-20
An outstanding book that gives cause to reflect.
We are not the author’s intended audience. We are in our mid seventies, married over 50 years. My wife and I listened to the entire book together, a chapter a day. We both considered chapter 7, an incredible chapter for the insight it provided. My wife was verbally bullied by other girls, at the start of seventh grade. She had been happy until then. She was not invited to birthday parties. That gave her very low self esteem and led to poor decisions. She felt she was worthless to humanity, until I came along, just after she graduated high school. She thought she was the only girl treated this way, in junior high. The book gave her tremendous insight into the fact that she was bullied, and that her treatment was not unique. The book in effect, made her feel normal. We have had a wonderful 50 year plus marriage, and as she has stated, “ I’ve had a wonderful life. It really depends on who you marry.”
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- F. Luo
- 09-02-20
Not a helpful book
Not a very helpful book for a teacher who teaches middle school. Used too many examples from the 70s and doesn’t seem to get the fact that kids this age exaggerate to appear cool. The last part of the book provided some good information but people might loose their interest before getting into the last part
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- Valerie Thorp
- 12-07-20
Pointless: author offers no advice or insight.
This book was a complete waste of my time; I only listened to the the whole book hoping for some redeemable conversation and because I didn't want the time I had already invested listening to be for naught. The majority of the book is a review of the history of family life over the past century. It includes information that you'd have to have lived in a cave to not already know. In fact, the entire book is basic info of the life of adolescents that any adult and even child would have knowledge of simply from living in our society. It also focuses on places like NY and big city communities that have many issues that are not just common knowledge but do not apply to kids and communities in less wealthy or even middle-class, mid-sized cities or rural areas of the country. The author offers no advice or intelligent insight into modern life with middle school aged children. The book only becomes mildly interesting in the last couple of chapters, where the author finally begins discussing modern life.
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