Pirate Humor

Set in the years around 1492, Yiddish for Pirates recounts the compelling story of Moishe, a Bar Mitzvah boy who leaves home to join a ship's crew, where he meets Aaron, the polyglot parrot who becomes his near-constant companion. From a present-day Florida nursing home, this wisecracking yet poetic bird guides us through a world of pirate ships, Yiddish jokes, and treasure maps. But Inquisition Spain is a dangerous time to be Jewish and Moishe joins a band of hidden Jews trying to preserve some forbidden books.

#1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER Rock & Roll Hall of Fame inductee Jimmy Buffett offers his philosophy on life and how to live it, “like sitting with Buffett at a beachside bar, listening to him spin tales” (Time). “Buffett took his family on a three-week trek around the Caribbean...

In the second book of the suspense-filled Gentleman Bastard Sequence, hailed by George R. R. Martin as “fresh, original, and engrossing,” Locke Lamora faces a caper so death-defying that nothing short of a miracle will pull it off. For some, only a prize worth dying for makes life worth...

There will be plenty of time for me to beat him soundly once I've gotten what I came for. Sent on a mission to retrieve an ancient hidden map—the key to a legendary treasure trove—seventeen-year-old pirate captain Alosa deliberately allows herself to be captured by her enemies, giving her...

"Marisa Calin's delivery of this audiobook is superbly executed...The enticing voice she gives Alosa will enrapture listeners and draw them deeper into the story's twists and turns." — AudioFile Magazine The capable, confident, and occasionally ruthless heroine of Daughter of the Pirate King...

Yet another brilliant entry in Kenemore’s zombie canon - Cap’n Hook meets the undead. Set in the Caribbean of the eighteenth century, the epicenter of piracy, voodoo, and the dark arts, The Code of the Zombie Pirate reveals all the secrets to selecting, customizing, and managing a motley crew of pirates-cum-zombies.

A prim lady. A scandalous pirate. A high-seas seduction that could sink them both. Lady Priscilla Worthington has spent her life buttoned up—poised, polished, and promised to a man she can’t stand. But when her carriage is hijacked and she’s taken aboard the infamous Crimson Corsair, she finds herself in the clutches of Captain Rogelio Velmontaine—a rogue with a wicked grin, a silver tongue, and absolutely no sense of decency. Storm-tossed and scandal-bound, Priscilla is drawn into a world of rum-soaked revelry, moonlit danger, and pleasures she never dared imagine. But as desire ...

Rob Morgan, a network engineer from that sprawling metropolis called Omaha, Nebraska, is going about his jaded, everyday life until a group of men in black suits yanks him from his best friend’s wedding and drops him into a totally-not-government-wink-wink black-site defense project. One accidental misstep later into a wormhole, he ends up in the year 1700 during the Golden Age of Piracy, finding himself thrust into a world of cannon fire, sword fights, treasure maps, and men in serious need of better hygiene.

Smugglers. Thieves. Pirates. The Sea Rover's crew embodies these defining qualities. Immerse yourself in a Science Fiction Adventure box set written by author C.P. MacDonald. Witness Captain Calin Aku's evolution from the most wanted outlaw on the Moon to an unexpected if reluctant hero. Job by job, paycheck by paycheck, he keeps flying. However, with a new client comes a cascade of adventure, forging unusual alliances and unraveling amazing mysteries. These revelations don't just alter the lives of Calin and his crew but also reshape humanity's future. Join Calin Aku and his crew as they ...

Pirates of the Caribbean meets The Mummy in Vengeance of the Pirate Queen, a new standalone YA fantasy romance, set in the world of Tricia Levenseller's Daughter of the Pirate King. As an assassin working for the pirate queen, 18-year-old Sorinda is surprised when Alosa’s next task for her is...

Forget dusty textbooks and heroic legends — history was usually a lot messier than the souvenir-shop version. If you think you know the real stories behind pirates, Vikings, the American Revolution, and the Wild West… Hollywood has probably lied to you. Sarcastic History Volume 2 takes on four of history’s most romanticized eras and starts asking inconvenient questions. Were pirates really burying treasure everywhere? Did Vikings wear horned helmets? Was the American Revolution one long inspirational speech? And did everyone in the Wild West settle arguments at high noon? Not exactly....

1719. Great Britain is at war with Spain. When his mother dies, fourteen year old Dan Leake finds himself alone on the mean streets of Bristol. Faced with starvation or the workhouse, he stows away on a British man-o-war, hoping to find his father who had been pressed into the Royal Navy years before. Falsely accused of theft, Dan is shunned by his shipmates and bullied by the sadistic bosun, as he endures the brutal life aboard an eighteenth century warship. He finally discovers the real thief, and his courage, at the bloody Battle of Cape St. Vincent. At his moment of triumph, he realises...

1721. The slave trade ravages the West Coast of Africa. With his world turned upside down, and disillusioned with family and society, Dan Leake, now 16, gets together a disparate group of ex-pirates and runaway slaves. With this motley crew, Dan steals a ship and they flee from Jamaica. They sail to the coast of Africa where they plan to disrupt the African slave trade and get rich at the same time. Pursued by the navies of the powerful slaving nations, and hunted by vengeful pirates, Dan and his followers are forced from the Atlantic. Rounding the stormy Cape of Good Hope, they sail into ...

Thanks to the Cat in the Hat’s new mobile invention, the Great Catastrophic Cacophany Cruiser (a studio, car and excitement-infuser), our heroes can travel the world while recording the silliest podcast ever made and meeting the wildest, most Seussian characters imaginable. With new songs, ridiculous rhymes, and absurd adventures galore, join the Cat in the Hat and Fish as they journey across highways, byways, and skyways to the weirdest, most wondrous, and wildly whimsical places you’ve ever experienced.

Gary the Stegosaurus wants to be a pirate. But when he gets the chance, things do not work out. Getting seasick is the least of Gary's worries once he's on that ship!

I thought saving the galaxy four times was enough. Turns out, the galaxy disagreed. When a ruthless fleet of intergalactic space pirates storms the Dominion’s trade routes, Alex and the crew of the Starflare find themselves in the middle of a war they never asked for—again. Their mission: stop the biggest pirate armada in the quadrant before it burns half the galaxy to ash. Outgunned, outnumbered, and low on snacks, Alex, Lucy, Joey, and the rest of the crew have to pull off their most insane plan yet. Between malfunctioning tech, questionable alliances, and a pirate queen with a ...

Nothing breaks the ice like a frozen wife and whiskey. In the murderously hot kingdom of Lithowania—an island so deliberately missing from maps that explorers go to "great pains" to exclude it—Captain Slavic Kristofferson arrives with the ultimate diplomatic strategy: a massive ice sculpture of his wife's face. Where previous negotiators earned only spears in their hulls, Kristofferson's whiskey-on-ice and innovative snow machine soon have the natives building temples to frozen Hilda. After all, when you've spent your entire existence melting, the sudden discovery of "cold" becomes ...

The "famouse" reporter appears on a TV game show to save his newspaper and joins his sister on a haunted pirate treasure hunt in this pair of exciting adventures.

Take a wildly funny road trip through the strangest side of the Sunshine State in Weird South Florida Stories: Road Trip Edition — a hilarious and fascinating journey through swamps, tropical islands, bizarre wildlife, haunted legends, roadside attractions, and the wonderfully chaotic world of South Florida. From frozen iguanas falling out of trees to giant pythons invading the Everglades, this entertaining travel book uncovers the weirdest true stories hiding beneath the palm trees. Explore the madness of Miami nightlife, the haunted history of Key West, mysterious places like Coral ...

An all-new unofficial Minecraft warrior adventure series for young readers from bestselling author Cube Kid! This story follows Runt, a villager who longs to be a warrior. He isn’t interested in carrot culture, and he definitely isn’t interested in selling them in trade. When Runt decides to...