Pirate Humor

Smugglers. Thieves. Pirates. The Sea Rover's crew embodies these defining qualities. Immerse yourself in a Science Fiction Adventure box set written by author C.P. MacDonald. Witness Captain Calin Aku's evolution from the most wanted outlaw on the Moon to an unexpected if reluctant hero. Job by job, paycheck by paycheck, he keeps flying. However, with a new client comes a cascade of adventure, forging unusual alliances and unraveling amazing mysteries. These revelations don't just alter the lives of Calin and his crew but also reshape humanity's future. Join Calin Aku and his crew as they ...

Yet another brilliant entry in Kenemore’s zombie canon - Cap’n Hook meets the undead. Set in the Caribbean of the eighteenth century, the epicenter of piracy, voodoo, and the dark arts, The Code of the Zombie Pirate reveals all the secrets to selecting, customizing, and managing a motley crew of pirates-cum-zombies.

There will be plenty of time for me to beat him soundly once I've gotten what I came for. Sent on a mission to retrieve an ancient hidden map—the key to a legendary treasure trove—seventeen-year-old pirate captain Alosa deliberately allows herself to be captured by her enemies, giving her...

When word of his abilities spreads through the galactic grapevine, Ben ranks number one on an A.I.’s most wanted list to become their cybernated slave. As he’s thrust into an interstellar struggle, Ben discovers a powerful alien hiding on Earth. Determined to protect it, he must outmaneuver relentless enemies, decode cryptic warnings, and determine whether a headstrong spaceship is friend or foe. The fate of more than just his own survival is at stake, and if he fails, the entire universe could pay the price.

Follow the further adventures and misadventures of Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III as his Viking training continues and his father leads a stranger and the Hairy Hooligans to the Isle of Skullions in search of a pirate's treasure.

1721. The slave trade ravages the West Coast of Africa. With his world turned upside down, and disillusioned with family and society, Dan Leake, now 16, gets together a disparate group of ex-pirates and runaway slaves. With this motley crew, Dan steals a ship and they flee from Jamaica. They sail to the coast of Africa where they plan to disrupt the African slave trade and get rich at the same time. Pursued by the navies of the powerful slaving nations, and hunted by vengeful pirates, Dan and his followers are forced from the Atlantic. Rounding the stormy Cape of Good Hope, they sail into ...

To escape from a life of petticoats and politeness, Hilary answers a curious advertisement for a pirate crew and suddenly finds herself swept up in a seafaring adventure that may or may not involve a map without an X, a magical treasure that likely doesn't exist, a rogue governess who insists on propriety, a crew of misfit scallywags, and the most treacherous - and unexpected - villain on the High Seas. Will Hilary find the treasure in time? Will she become a true pirate after all? And what will become of the gargoyle?

In his fourth sidesplitting adventure, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock III must rescue his best friend, Fishlegs, from the deadly disease Vorpentitis. The only cure is rare and almost impossible to find...a potato. But where will Hiccup find such a thing? He'll have to dodge the terrible Sharkworms, battle Doomfangs, and outwit crazy Hooligans if he's going to be a Hero...again.

Set in the years around 1492, Yiddish for Pirates recounts the compelling story of Moishe, a Bar Mitzvah boy who leaves home to join a ship's crew, where he meets Aaron, the polyglot parrot who becomes his near-constant companion. From a present-day Florida nursing home, this wisecracking yet poetic bird guides us through a world of pirate ships, Yiddish jokes, and treasure maps. But Inquisition Spain is a dangerous time to be Jewish and Moishe joins a band of hidden Jews trying to preserve some forbidden books.

In the fifth adventure in the How to Train Your Dragon series, someone has stolen the Fire-Stone. Now the volcano on Volcano Island has become active and the tremors are hatching the eggs of the Exterminator dragons! Can Hiccup return the Fire-Stone to the Volcano, stop the Volcano from erupting, and save the Tribes from being wiped out by the terrible sword-claws of the Exterminators?

While visiting the shores of Lake Geneva to restore their spirits and their finances, the Pirate Captain and his crew encounter some surprising fellow adventurers, literary giants of their age: the swaggering Lord Byron, the shifty Percy Shelley, and his smart attractive fiancée, Mary. Together the poets and pirates embark upon a journey that leads from the curiously adventureless Switzerland into the darkest bowels of Oxford, and finally to the forbidding heart of eastern Europe. Amidst haunted castles and early feminism, the Pirate Captain will confront some important questions.

When her big sister Violet has friend trouble at school, Dory tries to come to her rescue. But, of course, Dory's active imagination takes over, and Dory's suddenly sure that Violet's problem involves pirates - and Violet's lost friendship bracelet is hidden treasure. When Dory sets sail to recover the treasure, she has to navigate rocky waters without her imaginary friend Mary, who has gone off on vacation with an exciting new friend of her own.

Jeremy Jacob was sitting on the beach one fine day with his parents when he saw a pirate ship heading their way. He tried to warn his family, but it was already much too late. When the ship landed, the pirates welcomed Jeremy aboard. Jeremy thought that being a pirate would be fun, but it wasn't nearly as nice as he thought it would be. Late one night at sea, a gigantic storm struck, and the pirate ship was wrecked. With nowhere else to go, Jeremy and the pirates go back to his house!

Hilary Westfield is now a freelance pirate. After trying to prove herself to the VNHLP, she realized many members of the league weren't all that honorable - not even very nearly. With Captain Blacktooth in cahoots with the Mutineers, the kingdom of Augusta and all its magic are at risk.

Hilary Westfield is a pirate. In fact, she's the Terror of the Southlands! She's daring, brave, fearless, and . . . in a rut. Maybe she hasn't found any treasure lately. And maybe she isn't fighting off as many scallywags as she'd like. But does that mean she and her loyal crew (including a magical gargoyle) deserve to be kicked out of the ranks of the Very Nearly Honorable League of Pirates? There is only one thing to do - find a daring mission worthy of her fearless reputation.

Explore Enchancia with Sofia the First, and sail the Never Sea with Jake and his crew. Help Doc diagnose her toy patients; hang out at the Clubhouse with Mickey, Minnie, and the rest of the gang; and have a roarsome time with Henry Hugglemonster! This fun-filled book features eighteen stories starring your favorite Disney Junior pals!

1719. Great Britain is at war with Spain. When his mother dies, fourteen year old Dan Leake finds himself alone on the mean streets of Bristol. Faced with starvation or the workhouse, he stows away on a British man-o-war, hoping to find his father who had been pressed into the Royal Navy years before. Falsely accused of theft, Dan is shunned by his shipmates and bullied by the sadistic bosun, as he endures the brutal life aboard an eighteenth century warship. He finally discovers the real thief, and his courage, at the bloody Battle of Cape St. Vincent. At his moment of triumph, he realises...

A prim lady. A scandalous pirate. A high-seas seduction that could sink them both. Lady Priscilla Worthington has spent her life buttoned up—poised, polished, and promised to a man she can’t stand. But when her carriage is hijacked and she’s taken aboard the infamous Crimson Corsair, she finds herself in the clutches of Captain Rogelio Velmontaine—a rogue with a wicked grin, a silver tongue, and absolutely no sense of decency. Storm-tossed and scandal-bound, Priscilla is drawn into a world of rum-soaked revelry, moonlit danger, and pleasures she never dared imagine. But as desire ...

The long-awaited 9th book in the beloved CASTLE PERILOUS fantasy series. Castle Perilous is a dangerous place to live. But some of its Guests are danger addicts. It's been years since Gene Ferraro, champion swordsman, has had a real adventure. He finds a swashbuckling world of pirates and manages to have a rousing time battling zombies, vampires, and an evil empire or two. Linda Barclay, resident Castle mage, reluctantly accompanies him but finds more romance than she ever expected. Meanwhile, back at the Castle, its magic goes awry (what again?—that trick never works!) and Lord ...

Ben and Lois are closer to reuniting Bubbles with her long-lost alien mother, but just because they're closer doesn’t mean it’s going to be easy. They must face off against an army of spiderbots, killer mushrooms, and a colossal cave monster the size of a '69 Buick … and that’s just the warm up! Buttercup finds herself in mortal peril and our dynamic duo have no idea how to save her. So it leaves a big question hanging out there; Will Ben and Lois conquer these outrageous obstacles to save Buttercup and achieve the most epic reunion in the galaxy?