Funny Fantasy Adventure

When petty criminal Cal Carver is locked in a cell with a deranged, semi-naked cannibal, he suspects his life has hit its lowest point. He is mistaken. Abducted by aliens and whisked across the galaxy, Cal is thrown into a team of misfits and criminals and sent on a top secret mission for the president of Space. And that's when everything starts to go very, very wrong....

A boy discovers his destiny could totally stink in this riotously funny fantasy-adventure Risk-averse Greg Belmont is content with being ordinary. He's got a friend--that's right, just one--at his fancy prep school, and a pretty cool dad (even if he is obsessed with organic soaps that smell like...

“Before I can begin my tale, you need to know about the king's panties.” So begins the epic adventure of 14-year-old Nigel, digger of latrines, shoveler of poop, and the single greatest threat to all the humans, elves, and halflings of Esteria. Nigel needs to escape from military school. Who can blame him? After all, the king just declared war on the gorks, and he's pretty sure his latrine-digging skills aren't going to be much good on the front lines.

Elijah Muddle’s life changed in an instant. The son of a spiteful and mean manure farmer, Elijah now has become an apprentice to the town’s warlock, Caliban. The chance to escape his terrible father and learn magic? It’s a dream come true! Until...it turns out that Elijah’s internal magic is wonky, and he is the absolute worst warlock ever - all his spells go wildly wrong, causing both hilarious and disastrous consequences all over town.

New middle school? Scary. Falling into a world of dragons and dark magic? Terrifying. Twin siblings Kyle and Kenzie thought starting a new middle school was their biggest problem until a mysterious, golden dragon yanked them through a portal into a realm filled with mythical beasts, skeletal soldiers, and wand-wielding witches. Stranded in a dangerous world where magic rules and nothing is as it seems, the twins join forces with a tiny dragon who’s lost his magic, and an ex-assassin with a haunted past. Their mission? Stop a power-hungry necromancer, survive an army of undead, and somehow...

When half your galaxy is unexpectedly sucked into a black hole - when a hitherto-unknown species of space aliens lays waste to your home planet - when disaster rears its ugly head (or heads) - who can you call for faster-than-light appraisals and best-in-the-multiverse customer service? Just one man - Tom Stranger, Interdimensional Insurance Agent. In this latest chapter of his interstellar exploits, Tom is about to deliver a crushing performance evaluation to Jimmy the Intern when the unimaginable happens: The beloved Wendell the Manatee has been kidnapped!

When you offer therapy to monsters, it’s wise to keep a sword handy. Master swordsman Logan Snow thought trading epic quests for a cozy counseling center would be his happily-ever-after. After all, when you delve into a giant’s dark past or advise an ogre with anger issues, what could go wrong? When a letter arrives bearing the grim news that Logan’s old mentor has been captured by a powerful warlock and imprisoned in his citadel, he must dust off his sword and attempt a desperate rescue. He rallies a group of unlikely heroes including Tressa, an alluring and deadly magician, and ...

An alien cat turned me into a superweapon. I was homeless on the streets of Third York when it happened. Then the military arrived and gave me a choice. Enlist or die. The next thing I knew, I was fighting giant robots at the Xenoforce Academy's boot camp. Figuring out superpowers and energy levels was hard enough, but I had to deal with a mind-reading alien princess, a team of gorgeous women, and a femme fatale in charge of the whole operation. Oh, and a galactic conspiracy is threatening all of humanity. It's up to me and my new feline friend to set things right. A civil war's brewing on ...

A Bite of Christmas Magic Nine-year-old Sofia is no ordinary girl, she’s spirited, sassy, and always ready for mischief. But when her grandmother gives her a mysterious tin of magical Christmas cookies, Sofia discovers that each bite is a doorway to a world of holiday wonder! From the jingling bells of Jingle Bell Junction to the peppermint twists of Candy Cane Courtyard, the sparkling stars of Star City, and the sweet surprises of Gingerbread Grove, every cookie whisks Sofia away on a new adventure. In each magical land, she’s gifted a dazzling gown, meets whimsical creatures, and ...

Having the cutest neighbor is a real pain in the neck... Callie is immune to all forms of magic—including the mesmerizing gaze that lets vampires bend humans to their will. That's made her the target of an ancient evil determined to enslave her... or destroy her. Her only hope lies in her mysterious neighbor, Armant. His superhuman strength and piercing intuition captivate her as much as they frighten her. Yet, her bright spirit has ignited a spark within him that he thought had long been extinguished. And Armant has a score to settle with the master vampire that's targeting her. As ...

There are rules about owning a dragon. Don’t tell your parents. Don’t feed it cereal. And definitely don’t take it to Show-and-Tell. When a sarcastic, snack-loving kid finds a fire-breathing best friend named Flamey in his backyard, his life gets toasted—in the best possible way. But when Flamey mysteriously vanishes, what follows is a laugh-out-loud, marshmallow-melting mystery across secret tunnels, donut guilds, sewer traps, and a town that just doesn’t believe in dragons. Yet. Packed with heart, humor, friendship, and more flaming burps than anyone requested, Hey, Who Stole My...

Christmas stories Stories Collection ******************* Young and beginner reader’s kids would get the most enjoyment from the tree titles for Christmas we selected In We hope you enjoy reading them to your kids, grandchildren. SEA OF LOVE <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 * <3 Just off by the sea in a small shabby shack, Lived Sarah’s whole family, a big crowded pack, Two parents, three brothers, and three sisters, too; With less room inside as all the kids grew. OH DEAR SAID THE DEER ************************************* "Oh dear," said the deer, "I'm so cold, what a plight! I've searched for a...

The first novel in the First Law Trilogy and debut fantasy novel from New York Times bestseller, Joe Abercrombie. Logen Ninefingers, infamous barbarian, has finally run out of luck. Caught in one feud too many, he's on the verge of becoming a dead barbarian -- leaving nothing behind him but bad...

#1 New York Ministry of Witches Official Record When botanist Aleda Vance inadvertently triggers an ancient succession clause, she’s thrust into the role of Minister of Witches - leading New York’s most bewildering magical bureaucracy. 🪄 Between temperamental elevators, mischievous runes, and staff who defer to enchanted tea trolleys, she must juggle magic and paperwork before the next full moon. But as forgotten spells stir beneath the marble floors of the Ministry, Aleda learns that real power doesn’t come from confidence it comes from care, curiosity, and quiet resilience. 🌱 ...

He will need more than bravery to survive what’s coming. Doomed to fight the Dark King, Stone must find the path to save every living soul from the ferocious dark dragons. Together with his friends: Ceres, rambunctious and shrewd, Adler; snide and courageous, and Corvaire; of the legendary knights of Darakan, they must find the new powerful sorceresses— the Majestic Wilds. But they’ll have to be quick— for the warring kings will surely be after them soon. Not to mention King Arken Shadowborn and his own monstrous dragon. Will they be able to find these new Majestic Wilds in time? ...

Can a stuttering wizard become the hero of legend? Marvin is a wizard… kind of. He’s got magic, a glowing horn, and a scroll of Fireball he’s too nervous to use. He also stutters when he's scared, trips over his own cloak, and never expected to be chosen for anything legendary. But when a shattered crown from an ancient hero starts glowing in his presence, Marvin’s quiet life turns upside down. With danger rising and forgotten enemies awakening, Marvin must team up with a grumpy orc warrior, a clever tinker with a thing for smoke bombs, and a poet who can’t stop talking (or ...

Superweapon stud? That's what the doctor ordered. The Beastmasters are dwindling. The Mekanics are growing bolder. Everyone's desperate for the next magic bullet. With no more Chimerics arriving, there's only one way to make more Beastmasters. Me. I'm not against making baby Beastmasters with the hotties on my squad. The problem is that they're not telling me everything. The last time they tried this, things got pretty ugly... All hell's breaking loose. Secrets are spilling left and right. Even my alien cat Zoe can't keep all the facts straight. And everyone wants a piece of me. There's ...

Seth is down for the count. A strange artifact from another era has surfaced to contest Ace's claim to the elemental battlefield. Tensions rise between factions and the potential of a great calamity lies just around every turn. Life and death hang in the balance in Chaos Incarnate.

Tamsyn Muir’s Gideon the Ninth unveils a solar system of swordplay, cut-throat politics, and lesbian necromancers. Her characters leap out of the audio, as skillfully animated as arcane revenants. The result is a heart-pounding epic science fantasy. Brought up by unfriendly, ossifying nuns, ancient retainers, and countless skeletons, Gideon is ready to abandon a life of servitude and an afterlife as a reanimated corpse.

One night with a superpowered babe. Alan Star thinks he's the luckiest guy in the world, but fantasy turns into nightmare when a late-night meetup with a heroine turns deadly. To the dismay of the powers-in-charge, Alan has stumbled upon the dirty truth behind the squeaky-clean image of the hero business. Soon, everyone from government black ops to angry superpowered flames want to shut him up. Permanently. With nowhere else to run, Alan escapes to the one place that the heroes won't go: the underground world of a fabled hero-killer. There, he discovers the key to becoming the greatest hero...