We sat down for Anthony’s birthday episode and immediately chose violence.

We’re talking about The Punisher (1989), a movie that wastes zero time proving it absolutely does not give a single coherent fuck. A film that opens like a bargain-bin James Bond fever dream, then sprints straight into explosions and foot-stab assassinations. Our Birthday Boy is riding the host chair; it’s chaos, it’s loud, and honestly, it’s kind of beautiful.

It’s also a very full house at Rewatch Party HQ, with Anthony, Nick, Elise, Manny, AND Dan all trying to keep up with a movie that refuses to explain anything besides repeating apparently legally binding exposition about 125 gangland murders on loop. That doesn't stop us from enthusiastically narrating every insane beat. [X] Sewer monologue about justice, [X] a naked Punisher living like a damp raccoon philosopher, and [X] a drunken Shakespearean informant who should not, under any circumstances, be this plugged into organized crime. And that's on top of frog-ninja assassins, exploding mansions, and a dock shootout where Punisher zip-lines off a human body.

By the time we hit Yakuza takeovers, kidnapped kids, and a casino massacre where literally everyone in the building turns out to be an assassin, we’ve fully embraced the insanity. By the end of our time together today, you'll have a full appreciation of wingnut powered torture racks, the appeal(?) of the sewer nudist lifestyle, and a villain plan that boils down to "consolidate, then obliterate." In the end, is it messy and unhinged? Yes. But that was $9 million well spent and we had a damn good time.

Part two of our Rob Reiner tribute cranks things up from "contractually obligated chaos" to "loving homage" as we continue the end with Spinal Tap 2: The End Continues. We're looking in the mirror of a movie that hinges entirely on how, despite despising each other for years, people CAN be brought back together by Big Bottoms.

For the first time in Rewatch Party history, we bring in someone who's actually in the movie: Valerie F-ing Franco. Having survived music school with Nick, she now occupies rock's most dangerous chair as drummer Didi Crockett. So yes, indulge our delight when she casually drops stories about jamming with Paul McCartney, sharing the screen with Elton John, and having Christopher Guest as her personal hype-man. She also confirms the importance of preparation in the luck equation by booking the gig live in the room with McKean, Guest, and Shearer.

From there, we mix reverence and absolute nonsense in the Rewatch Party way. Val walks us through pitching drum kits themed after every dead Spinal Tap drummer (puke drums, anyone?), the moment John Michael Higgins broke Christopher Guest with a singular question about penis pain, and how Rob Reiner casually requested a blindfold drum solo. And for the economists in the fanbase, of course we unpack the cheese-for-guitars barter economy, and you'll agree Nigel was justified in most of his choices.

We close out with a genuine tribute to Rob and Michelle Reiner, a possible TRWP henge-related scoop, and the reminder that Didi Crockett is the twelfth drummer: one beyond eleven.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt20222166/

Rob Reiner. The man’s résumé could get its own standing ovation, but to celebrate his life we hop on tour with This Is Spinal Tap — an impossible film to direct, and yet, somehow he did it.

Ninety five percent improvised. No script. Just a loose roadmap, a camera, and a band of deeply committed idiots pretending to be deeply committed idiots. Anyone can say, “Just keep rolling, we’ll fix it later.” Rob actually pulled it off. We talk about how you direct chaos without strangling it, how you stage jokes that don’t technically exist yet, and why this might be one of the most daring comedy experiments ever captured on film.

The songs are real. The egos are familiar. Somewhere between a “bizarre gardening accident” and the reminder that you cannot dust for vomit, the satire becomes uncomfortably accurate. It’s a mockumentary so authentic it fooled people into thinking Spinal Tap was a real band, and honestly at this point, they kind of are.

If you’ve ever played in a band, dated someone in a band, or adjusted an amp past what is medically advisable, this one hits. Forty years later, it still goes to eleven.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0088258/

It’s Manny’s birthday, and he has officially hijacked the host mic. Nick attempts a suspiciously “laid-back” vibe that convinces no one, Elise gets drafted as the ringmaster by default, and Anthony provides steady resistance in the form of skepticism, legal concerns, and the occasional reminder that he is, in fact, a law-abiding citizen. The energy is celebratory, but the guardrails are gone.

This week we break down why Edgar Wright’s 2017 action-musical Baby Driver still presses every one of Manny’s birthday-boy buttons. If you do not personally own a Subaru by the end of the opening chase, we have questions about your judgment. Also, your failure to synchronize your windshield wipers to your Spotify playlist has us questioning your commitment. Real cars, real stunts, real driving, and a director who appears to believe that timing matters more than explosions combine to flip a very specific switch in Manny’s brain.

We also grapple with the slightly uncomfortable experience of hearing Kevin Spacey look into the camera and say, “That’s my baby,” unlock the lingering mystery of “The Yelling,” and ask whether a movie should be allowed this much access to your brain’s question-asking off switch. If confidence were fuel, this film, and this episode, would never need to stop for gas. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3890160/

We strap on the Oakleys, cue up Limp Bizkit, and immediately start asking the hard questions. Everyone is whispering, doves are everywhere, and Tom Cruise glues himself to a rockface. Yep, John Woo was here. This week we slow motion our way into Mission Impossible 2, a motorcycle kicking, face ripping mad dash where the vibes are immaculate and the plot mostly exists to justify another coat flutter. Along the way we marvel at aggressively yanked terrain warnings, questionable science, Anthony Hopkins popping in like he lost a bet, and another villain who truly believes in the finger snipping bad guy school of management. It is the most year 2000 movie imaginable, and we have a lot of feelings about it.

From exploding sunglasses to masks under masks under worse masks, this movie is operating at maximum swagger and minimum concern for how viruses or gravity work. Thandiwe Newton is asked to carry emotional weight while dodging motorcycles, Tom Cruise broods with the intensity of a man legally prohibited from blinking. Is it the best entry in the franchise? No. Is it a fascinating artifact from a time when action movies were legally required to be sweaty and loud? Absolutely. Join us as we unpack the most stylish, most confused, and most aggressively slow motion chapter in the Mission Impossible saga.

Tom Cruise runs. Tom Cruise rips faces off. Tom Cruise would like you to know he is a normal human man with a perfectly centered tooth and no further questions at this time.

This week we accept our mission and immediately compromise it by talking too much. Let’s take a fresh look at Brian De Palma’s aggressively stylized spy reboot - Mission Impossible, a movie that invents modern blockbuster espionage while also insisting that every elevator in Eastern Europe is one bad day away from becoming a murder device. Anthony zeroes in on the franchise DNA, questioning whether Ethan Hunt has ever actually fired a gun, or if this is just Fast & Furious for people who can breathe through their noses. Elise remains deeply unconvinced by nearly everything on screen, especially the soft-focus glow applied exclusively to women, the sheer confidence of the plot, and the continued, unforgivable lack of Kurt Russell. And in case you had ANY doubts about what anyone means by 0400, Dan is back and has the answer.

From the cursed NOC list to face-rip-ception and a theme song in 5/4 because aliens apparently deserve something to dance to, this is a movie that commits hard. Don’t get any on you, trust no elevator, and remember: if someone says “abort,” they absolutely do not mean it.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117060/

It's the Christmas Episode!

(To the tune of The Christmas Song)

Penguins roasting in the sewer pipes, Black fish goop on Danny’s chin, Scary clowns with their guns all ablaze, and folks get thrown through high windows,

Everybody knows A Batmobile with jet exhaust Helps to make the season bright, Catwoman flips, cracks, and struts through the pain, Walken won't sleep well tonight

He knows that Batman’s on his way, He's loaded lots of neat new weapons that don't slay And every Gotham goon will stop and whine To see ask setting clowns on fire counts as "fine"

And so we’re offering this simple phrase from Burton back in ninety-two, Although it’s been said many times, many ways, It's a nightmare dressed in latex at the zoo

Clint Eastwood shows up, directs himself, scores his own movie, and lands every emotional punch. Million Dollar Baby steps into the ring with gloves off, and we regret to inform you that this week we actually take a movie seriously.

There’s a surprising amount of calm confidence in how this movie moves. Catholic guilt doing laps around a boxing gym, Hilary Swank quietly turning in an undeniable all-timer, and all signs pointing to a conclusion that Clint Eastwood may have never been wrong about anything in his life except maybe not having Ring Dudes between rounds.

So we joke, we curse, we opine about how great it must be to sound like Morgan Freeman. They’re just fighting uphill against a story that insists on being sad in a way that’s earned, not manipulative. What starts as a boxing drama slowly reveals itself as an existential gut punch that refuses to let us laugh our way out of it. Get your guard up and mouthpiece in, Eastwood's gonna wreck you.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0405159/