The Myth of the Calm Parent — Why Perfection Isn’t the Goal (Episode 188)

We all want to be the calm, grounded parent — the one who never yells, never snaps, and always responds with empathy. But striving for perfect calm can actually distance us from our kids and ourselves.

In this episode, Kyle and Sara Wester unpack the myth of the “perfectly calm” parent and explain why real growth comes from repair and honest emotional awareness, not perfection. They explore how your nervous system, triggers, and childhood conditioning shape your reactions — and how to move from shame to self-understanding when moments get hard.

You’ll learn why repair is one of the most powerful tools in parenting and why your authenticity matters far more than appearing composed.

We explore:

• Why “calm” isn’t the same as staying emotionally present
• How unrealistic standards keep parents stuck in guilt
• What happens in your body when you suppress emotions
• How to model emotional honesty and repair
• Simple practices to regulate in real time — and recover when you can’t

Key takeaway:

👉 The goal isn’t perfect calm — it’s staying real and coming back together after the hard moments.

View the full podcast transcript at:

https://www.artofraisinghumans.com/the-myth-of-the-calm-parent-why-perfection-isnt-the-goal

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