In this episode, Mary sits down for a second time with her friend and fellow author, Jason VanRuler, to explore how our past shapes our communication styles and Jason's brand new book Discovering Your Communication Type. They discuss the 5 communication types based on the PATHS model, how to recognize and adapt to different styles, and practical tools for building stronger, more authentic relationships. It is one thing to finally get the courage to SHOW UP and share your voice. But it is a whole other level to show up and speak to people in a way that meets them right where they are!

In this episode, you'll hear:

• An introduction to the five communication types: Peacemaker, Advocate, Thinker, Harbor, Spark
• How childhood experiences influence these communication styles
• The strengths AND weaknesses of each type
• The importance of both self-awareness and empathy in communication
• The impact of stress on the 5 Types
• Strategies for speaking to different types effectively (what to say, what NOT to say!)
• The role of attachment theory in what people say
• How to meet others where they are without watering yourself down
• Practical questions to improve understanding during conversations
• … and SO much more!

• Why Fear doesn't shout "NEVER," it simply whispers "Not yet"
• The importance of fighting fire with fire when it comes to procrastination's dopamine hits
• How urgency and deadlines can accelerate productivity and breakthrough moments
• The concept of the 'habit loop'—trigger, behavior, reward—and building systems to rewire them
• The four key permissions: Dream, Plan, Do, Review … and why they are total game-changers
• Overcoming society's narrative that personal responsibility is a dirty word
• How to leverage public failure and perceived judgment as fuel for motivation (without it becoming unhealthy)
• The difference between shortsighted fuels (like anger or shame) and sustainable fuels (like deep joy)
• The ultimate definition of a remarkable life: actions aligning with intentions
• and SO much more!

• Why poet Rainer Maria Rilke once said, ""Life is very singularly made to surprise us...where it does not utterly appall us."
• What it means to "carry the cosmos" without slipping into carrying the weight of the world
• The counterintuitive Theory of Balance that tells us to carry something hard… carry something equally heavy in the other hand.
• Why Shannan doesn't believe in chasing traditional "life balance" but instead embraces a push/pull approach inspired by Chef David Chang's interplay of complex flavors
• How strange it can be to buy flowers in a world on FIRE
• The MANDATE for Joy Shannan prescribes us as necessary to continue fighting for the cause of humanity
• Why the parable of the scattered seeds in the Gospel of Mark went from a "me" story to an "US" story for Shannan
• The reminder from Shannan's son that Jesus is the "God on the Ground" and what we have to learn from that.
• ...and seriously SO much more!

We get so afraid of failing, that we would rather not show up to our own lives at all present and accounted for... than risk showing up and getting it wrong. Than risk putting ourselves out there not knowing all the answers. So we swing to the OPPOSITE extreme. We still show up, but we pretend like we don't really care that much. Yea, yea… we're chasing that dream but if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. We begin to believe that if we reject the dream before it has a chance to reject us… then we'll never get our hearts broken. But all that ultimately leaves us with is… regret. Instead, we have to show up and have ZERO chill about the dreams we are building. That we GET to live a life like that. Even if that means we occasionally risk getting it wrong.

In this solo episode of The Mary Marantz Show, Mary tells us to SHOW UP and DO the WORK.

Drawing on a recent Peloton ride where instructor Robin Arzon said "Your character knows when you cut corners," Mary does a deep dive into the cost of orginality, dealing with copycats & plagiarism, and what we get so very WRONG about "there is nothing new under the sun."

From there she builds into the TWO RULES she learned in academia (law school in particular) to create original work: 1) You have to survey the landscape to see what has already been said and then 2) You have to move the conversation forward in meaninful way.

Mary points to Harrison Ford's recent acceptance speech at his Lifetime Achievement Award at The SAG Actors and how he tells us how lucky he feels to STILL be doing the work over fifty years later. MOST people cut corners because they think it will get them to the goal faster. But it turns out the work IS the goal. The work is how we become someone WORTHY of celebrating.

• Burnout often leads to a cycle of overcommitment and anxiety.
• Identity crises can arise when we feel we must always perform.
• Learning to receive help is a crucial part of personal growth.
• We must repeat lessons until they are fully learned.
• Setting boundaries often means disappointing people.
• Transparency in business fosters community and connection.
• Learning from failures is a vital part of growth.
• Data should be seen as neutral, not personal.
• Iteration is key in the creative process.
• Launching new ideas requires listening to customer feedback & co-creating