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This ain’t your grandma’s podcast recap. After five long-ass years and 200 episodes of pure chaotic energy, The Funky Panther boys are still talkin’ shit, takin’ names, and accidentally jacking off crickets (don’t ask). In this “farewell-but-not-really” dumpster fire of nostalgia, we look back at the beer-soaked beginnings, roast our old intros, and get weirdly emotional over CPAP machines and robot vacuums. Chad announces he’s ditching the mic for married life and adulting — RIP to his balls. Also featuring: edible-fueled honeymoons, dick jokes during serious announcements, and more clickbait than a Buzzfeed intern on meth.

If you’ve ever wanted to hear grown men cry into microphones while debating the proper term for robot slurs, this one’s for you.

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Fort Worth Magazine
Best of 2022 - Radio Personality/Podcast (Reader's Pick)

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Welcome to Touching Tips — where four emotionally unstable dudes collide into one chaotic AF podcast experiment. We’re talking anime, metal, horror flicks, Bad Bunny backlash, and yes... nachos worth a three-hour road trip. It’s the pilot of the Emo Panther crossover nobody asked for but everyone secretly needed. From Gilmore Girls rants and hot takes on Breaking Bad to unsolicited butthole elasticity facts — this episode’s a fever dream in 4K.

Expect:

• Unhinged anime analysis (One Piece, Chainsaw Man, Dandadan)
• Controversial takes on A24 films, Rocky, and Rory Gilmore being an actual menace
• Raw, offensive humor about Ghost Dongs™ and circumcision conspiracies
• A holy war over nachos, Chacho’s, and Salt Lake City mole dreams

We said what we said. If you're easily triggered or a Five Finger Death Punch fan… you’ve been warned.

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Fort Worth Magazine
Best of 2022 - Radio Personality/Podcast (Reader's Pick)

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We’re back, btches. After a short summer break filled with meat sweats and mental breakdowns, the Funky Panther trio returns to shove brisket, burnout, and batsht headlines right into your earholes. Chad, Javier, and Tim go full Texas savage, starting with the 2025 BBQ rankings—DFW’s laying pipe all over the state, with Goldee's and Dayne's making mouths (and arteries) explode. We build the ultimate meat plate that would make a cardiologist cry. #BBQPorn #TexasMeatCult

Then Tim has a corporate meltdown on mic. His desk job gets eaten and now he’s back in an ambulance, wrestling death and existential dread while pretending this is all fine. Spoiler: it’s not. #CorporateHell #ParamedicProblems #MidlifeCrisis

Javier dives into the international paintless dent mafia—yes, a real thing—where Italians and Brazilians get flown in like storm-chasing mercenaries to fix Texas hail damage while dodging visa drama and sketchy middlemen. It’s capitalism, but make it Fast & Furious. #DentLife #ImmigrantHustle #TexasStormMoney

Things spiral fast:
🚗 Self-driving Teslas plotting murder
🍁 Abbott vetoing THC like it’s the 1950s
✈️ Plane crash survival tips from dudes who definitely wouldn’t survive
🚽 And the crown jewel—someone literally stole an 18-karat gold toilet named "America" from a palace. If that doesn’t summarize 2025, nothing does. #GoldToiletHeist #AmericanDreamMyAss #WTFNews

Oh, and JaeBoy calls in with music updates that make us question our own life choices. Again.

This episode’s got meat, madness, and mild existential terror. Buckle up—or cancel us. Either way, we’re flattered.

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CALL OR TEXT OUR HOTLINE AND LEAVE US A MESSAGE! 817-677-0408

Fort Worth Magazine
Best of 2022 - Radio Personality/Podcast (Reader's Pick)

Show Links
The Funky Panther
Merch
YouTube