How are you enjoying the episodes? Send a message!

What He's Thinking Substack: https://thespicyspectrum.substack.com/p/he-knows-its-wrong-so-why-does-he

In this episode of Spicy Spectrum, I get into something a lot of people feel but don’t always say out loud.

The “I know this is wrong, but…” part of desire.

I’m joined by Lucy Baldwin, who works with shadow work, existential kink, and understanding the deeper patterns behind human behavior. Together, we explore what it really means to face the parts of ourselves we usually avoid, especially when it comes to attraction, shame, and the things we’re told we’re not supposed to want.

We go beyond surface-level takes and get into how unconscious patterns shape desire, how judgment keeps people stuck, and why acknowledging these parts of ourselves can actually lead to more self-awareness and control.

I also feature a Spicy Confessions: Dreamgirl Hotline submission that brings this topic into real life. A listener shares their experience navigating emotional connection with a creator who may be shifting toward using chatters, raising questions around authenticity, emotional labor, and what it means to be a “good fan.”

I break it down from both sides and share my perspective on boundaries, connection, and the reality of burnout in the adult industry.

If you’ve ever questioned your desires, felt conflicted about what you want, or wondered what’s really going on underneath attraction, this episode is for you.

Learn more about Lucy Baldwin’s work:
https://www.remolinacoaching.com/

Support the show

Step into Your Experience and Design Your Dreamgirl™ | Join our email list | Sign up here and never miss out.

🎙 Be Part of the Show - Dreamgirl Hotline

Got a spicy confession, fantasy, commentary or question?| Leave your message here

1. Spicy Spectrum After Dark – Get your VIP Spectrum Supporter access on Patreon

2. Check out my What He’s Thinking — https://thespicyspectrum.substack.com/, where I share exclusive insights into male desire, behavior, and fantasy for women.

Connect With Us: spicyspectrumpodcast | Instagram, Facebook, TikTok | Linktree | #SpicySpectrum

How are you enjoying the episodes? Send a message!

This episode is a little more personal than usual.

I’ve been reflecting on what it actually feels like to be in my 30s. Not just how I look, but how I feel in my body, how I experience desire, and how my relationship with intimacy is changing in real time.

I talk about what it means to feel more aware of myself, more sensitive, more present, and yes, more turned on than I’ve ever been. And how that shift is not just physical, it is mental too.

I also open up about dating and why I am choosing not to settle, even when people expect me to. I share what I’ve learned about wanting connection without forcing permanence, and why I am no longer willing to compromise what I know I don’t want.

This is me being honest about where I am right now. Not having all the answers, but choosing to understand myself instead of judging myself.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re changing and you don’t fully recognize yourself yet, this conversation is for you.

Support the show

Step into Your Experience and Design Your Dreamgirl™ | Join our email list | Sign up here and never miss out.

🎙 Be Part of the Show - Dreamgirl Hotline

Got a spicy confession, fantasy, commentary or question?| Leave your message here

1. Spicy Spectrum After Dark – Get your VIP Spectrum Supporter access on Patreon

2. Check out my What He’s Thinking — https://thespicyspectrum.substack.com/, where I share exclusive insights into male desire, behavior, and fantasy for women.

Connect With Us: spicyspectrumpodcast | Instagram, Facebook, TikTok | Linktree | #SpicySpectrum

How are you enjoying the episodes? Send a message!

Read the companion article:
https://thespicyspectrum.substack.com/

What does intimacy actually mean in a relationship? Is it emotional connection, physical touch, or something deeper?

In this episode of Spicy Spectrum, I sit down with licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist Keri Green, LMFT, to unpack one of the most misunderstood topics in modern relationships.

We talk about why couples often confuse sex with intimacy, why people struggle to talk about desire and fantasies, and how curiosity and communication can completely shift the dynamic between partners.

I also connect this conversation to my Substack series What He’s Thinking, where I share insights based on what men reveal privately about connection, vulnerability, and physical desire.

Learn more about Keri Green, LMFT:
Website: https://kerigreenlmft.com/

Keri Green is a licensed marriage and family therapist and certified sex therapist with over twenty years of experience working with adults and couples navigating intimacy, communication, and sexual connection.

Support the show

Step into Your Experience and Design Your Dreamgirl™ | Join our email list | Sign up here and never miss out.

🎙 Be Part of the Show - Dreamgirl Hotline

Got a spicy confession, fantasy, commentary or question?| Leave your message here

1. Spicy Spectrum After Dark – Get your VIP Spectrum Supporter access on Patreon

2. Check out my What He’s Thinking — https://thespicyspectrum.substack.com/, where I share exclusive insights into male desire, behavior, and fantasy for women.

Connect With Us: spicyspectrumpodcast | Instagram, Facebook, TikTok | Linktree | #SpicySpectrum