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If your teen has been vaping, using weed, lying, or just seems totally unmotivated—and you’re tired of the constant arguments or feeling unsure how to help them turn things around—this episode is for you.

Amber Hollingsworth is an addiction specialist and creator of the YouTube channel Put The Shovel Down—and in this interview, Amber shares what really helps when teens are experimenting, struggling, or unmotivated to change.

Amber shares

• Why “waiting for rock bottom” backfires—and what creates change instead
• The #1 most enabling behavior (hint: it’s not giving $20)
• How to "Drop the rope” and get out of the tug-of-war and lower the resistance
• How you want natural consequences vs. parent-imposed punishment to do the teaching
• What true boundaries actually look like: spoiler - they are rules for yourself, not your teen
• How to build “credit” with your teen so your words carry weight

Key Takeaways:

• Don’t be the villain. When you argue, threaten, or lecture, you become the distraction that keeps your teen from looking inward.
• Let the world be the bad guy. Natural consequences teach; parent-made punishments often fuel denial and blame.
• Boundaries are about you. “If you’re arrested, I won’t pick you up”—that’s a boundary. “You can’t leave the house”—that’s a rule you likely can’t enforce.
• Lead with empathy, then influence. “I get why fitting in matters” opens ears; lectures close them.
• Build credibility (“credit”). When your teen feels understood, your guidance finally lands.

Where to find Amber:

• Put The Shovel Down on YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@PutTheShovelDown/videos
• Consults/coaching webiste: https://www.familyrecoveryacademy.online/
• Free Resources: https://www.familyrecoveryacademy.online/free-resources

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Check out What's Waiting For You At Moms of Tweens and Teens

Find more encouragement, wisdom, and resources:

Website: https://momsoftweensandteens.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Join our Community HERE.

Find awesome resources HERE.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Sheryl also has an Inner Circle weekly Parenting Program with a community of like-minded moms, personal coaching, and tons of resources to equip and support you to love well, navigate the challenges and meet your tween and teen’s unique needs during these pivotal years.

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Do you have a teen who spends most of their time in their room, glued to their phone, avoiding homework, and tuning you out—no matter what you say or do?
You’re not alone—and today’s conversation will help you understand what’s really going on and what you can do about it.

In this powerful and practical episode, Sheryl sits down with Dr. Melanie McNally, clinical psychologist, brain coach, and author of Helping Your Unmotivated Teen: A Parent’s Guide to Unlock Your Child’s Potential and The Emotionally Intelligent Teen. Since 2013, Melanie has helped hundreds of adolescents build emotional intelligence, motivation, and confidence—and today, she’s sharing her insights with us.

You’ll hear why so many teens struggle with motivation today, how technology is affecting their brains and emotions, and what we can do as parents to help our tweens and teens develop drive, grit, and goals. You’ll also hear why the first step to helping your teen might be looking at your own phone habits—and how modeling change can make all the difference.

What You’ll Learn (quick hits)

• Why tech disrupts self-regulation—and how to set simple family guardrails
• The listening shift that opens teens up (pause, reflect, then respond)
• Using both intrinsic and extrinsic motivators wisely
• Pairing structure with choice (e.g., “one sport + one club,” teen’s choice)
• How to spot small wins and transfer those skills to school

Where to Connect with Dr. Melanie:

Website: drmelaniemcnally.com • Instagram: @drmelaniemcnally
Books:

Helping Your Unmotivated Teen : https://amzn.to/3IUpRc2

The Emotionally Intelligent Teen: https://amzn.to/3VSlzF8

Support the show

Check out What's Waiting For You At Moms of Tweens and Teens

Find more encouragement, wisdom, and resources:

Website: https://momsoftweensandteens.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Join our Community HERE.

Find awesome resources HERE.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Sheryl also has an Inner Circle weekly Parenting Program with a community of like-minded moms, personal coaching, and tons of resources to equip and support you to love well, navigate the challenges and meet your tween and teen’s unique needs during these pivotal years.

Send us a text

Do you ever feel like all your tween or teen eats is buttered noodles or ramen? 🙋‍♀️ I hear this from so many moms — and I’ve been there too! We want our kids to eat healthier and learn life skills, but with everything on our plates, it feels impossible to make it happen.

That’s why I’m so excited about this conversation with Katie Kimball. Katie is a mom of four, a former teacher, and the creator of Kids Cook Real Food, named the best online cooking class for kids by the Wall Street Journal. She’s passionate about helping families build a healthier relationship with food, and she has a gift for teaching kids (and parents!) the skills they need in the kitchen — and beyond.

In this episode, Katie shares:

• How cooking can be a powerful way to connect with our kids and teach resilience.
• Why getting tweens and teens involved in the kitchen is one of the best gifts we can give them.
• Practical ways to help picky eaters expand their palate (without the battles).
• The life skills our kids gain when we let them take ownership and even fail in safe ways.
• How food impacts everything from mood to skin to energy — and how to help our kids notice it too.

This was such a fun and eye-opening conversation. Katie reminds us that teaching our kids to cook isn’t about adding another thing to our never-ending list — it’s about inviting them into everyday life in ways that lighten our load, build their confidence, and set them up for success.

Where to find Katie:

👉 You can grab some of Katie’s free resources at kidscookrealfood.com/tweens-and-teens

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@KatieKimball

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katiekimballkidscook/
.

Support the show

Check out What's Waiting For You At Moms of Tweens and Teens

Find more encouragement, wisdom, and resources:

Website: https://momsoftweensandteens.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Join our Community HERE.

Find awesome resources HERE.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/momsoftweensandteens/

Sheryl also has an Inner Circle weekly Parenting Program with a community of like-minded moms, personal coaching, and tons of resources to equip and support you to love well, navigate the challenges and meet your tween and teen’s unique needs during these pivotal years.