How To Unlearn Silence, Speak Your Mind, and Live More Fully With Elaine Lin Hering

Silence isn’t golden, it’s learned. And it’s costly. Communication expert and best-selling author Elaine Lin Hering (“Unlearning Silence”) explains why world-class feedback and negotiation tools still fail if our teams, relationships, and cultures quietly punish candor.

We unpack the hidden rules that keep people quiet: from mitigated speech (“Are you hungry?” when we mean “I’m hungry”) to the Babel hypothesis (we mistake talking a lot for leadership). Elaine shows how identity and power shape “best practices” (e.g., “be vulnerable” lands very differently for white men than it does for women and women of color), and offers practical redesigns so more voices can be heard.

You’ll learn

• How silence is taught at work, home, and in friendships—and when it actually makes sense.

• A simple clarity upgrade: say what you mean (and why we often don’t).

• The difference between real-time processors and post-processors—and how to structure meetings for both.

• Leadership moves that stop accidental silencing: state intent, reward candor, change the question (“What are the pros/cons?”), and build reply-all follow-ups after meetings.

• Ways to hold space across difference so vulnerability doesn’t backfire.

Actionable, empathetic, and sharp, this episode helps you speak your mind, unleash talent, and live more fully.