Ep 192: Being Your Autistic Child's Safe Person

In this episode of The Autism Mom Coach Podcast, I’m sharing a conversation from my appearance on Evolve with Dr. Tay with Dr. Taylor Day.

We talk about the part of autism parenting that gets overlooked: the parent’s nervous system. Not behavior charts. Not better scripts. The parent.

This conversation is about what it actually looks like to be your child’s safe person—without absorbing their distress, trying to fix what’s neurological, or burning yourself out in the process.

In This Episode, You’ll Learn:

1. Why parent regulation comes before co-regulation
2. What “being the safe person” actually requires (and what it doesn’t)
3. How staying in your own lane reduces escalation
4. Why behavior is information and how the meaning we attach to it fuels stress
5. What it means to lead as the CEO of your autism household
6. How acceptance strengthens leadership rather than weakening it

Lisa’s Takeaway

For a long time, I thought I needed better answers, better strategies, better plans, better experts. What actually changed things was learning how to regulate myself under pressure.

You can still be the safe person. You can still lead. And you don’t have to do everything for your child to do that.

About Dr. Taylor Day

Dr. Taylor Day is a licensed child psychologist and parent coach specializing in neurodivergent-affirming care. She brings both clinical expertise and lived experience as an autism sibling, with a strong focus on supporting the entire family system—not just the child.

Resources Mentioned:

1. The Autism Mom Coach: https://theautismmomcoach.com
2. Follow me on Instagram and Facebook: @TheAutismMomCoach
3. Free Resource: The Autism Mom’s Meltdown Plan — a clear Before-During-After framework for supporting your child while staying regulated yourself