In this Dear DSO submission, a husband shares his frustration: after two kids, his wife seems to have completely disappeared into motherhood. Once bubbly and fun, now she’s anxious, overwhelmed, and only shows affection after wine or exotic vacations.

He’s worked on himself, lost 60 lbs, rebuilt his confidence—but his wife won’t join him. No therapy. No gym. No time for herself. And definitely no connection with him as a man.

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Ned is a Special Ops vet whose marriage has seen it all — deployment, infidelity, gaslighting, emotional chaos… and now his wife wants to “separate, date around, and reevaluate in 6 months.” What should he do? This episode dives deep into how trauma, emotional abuse, and codependency show up in military marriages — and what men need to reclaim clarity and strength.

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In this powerful Dear DSO entry, I read a message from a man whose wife left him after 20 years of marriage. He gave everything to his family—his time, energy, identity—and now he's completely lost. No friends. No hobbies. No direction.

This story is not uncommon, and it shines a light on what happens when men sacrifice themselves entirely for the sake of family and end up with nothing when it all falls apart.

In this video, I break down his story and share what men in similar situations can do to rebuild and come back stronger than ever.

👉 Need help rebuilding your life after divorce?
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