Car Ride Home After Bad Games: What to Do When She Beats Herself Up
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If your daughter has ever said "I suck" after a game and you had no idea how to respond, this one's for you. 💛 Join my free training for sports moms: https://trainhergame.com/mom
I used to think the best response was to immediately reassure her. Tell her she played great. Remind her of all the things she did well.
But here's what I learned after 14 years of coaching girl athletes: That response actually makes her feel MORE misunderstood, not less.
In this video, I'm breaking down the 3-step system that actually works when your daughter tears herself apart after games or practices.
🎯 What you'll learn:
- Why "No you don't! You played great!" backfires (and what she's actually hearing when you say it)
- The 3-step response system: Validate → Ask → Offer Perspective
- Why your response is only half the solution (she needs her own mental skills too)
- Real transformation story: How one mom went from dreading pickup to easy car rides home
I also share the story of Leah and her daughter Campbell, who went from 20 minutes of post-practice negativity to healthy, objective processing after learning mental skills through our program.
🕓 Key Moments:
00:00 Introduction
02:24 What's Really Happening
03:45 The Three-Step System
03:53 Step 1: Validate the Feeling
05:30 Step 2: Ask Don't Tell
06:50 Step 3: Offer Perspective
07:50 Mental Skills Training
The Elite Mental Game teaches athletes how to catch negative thoughts before they spiral, use reset routines in real time, and assess their performance objectively instead of catastrophizing.
When you combine YOUR calm response with HER mental skills training, the car rides home get so much easier.
💬 Moms - comment below: What's your biggest struggle your daughter has a bad game?
📌 Free Tools & Next Steps
🙌 What's Your Competitor Style Quiz (to send your athlete!): https://www.videoask.com/fnbmhduxy
💜 Conversation Guide w/ Scripts to Bring Up Mental Training: https://s3.amazonaws.com/kajabi-storefronts-production/file-uploads/sites/144031/downloads/66e16c-6886-4a62-b8db-c43a1ae18fbd_The_Elite_Mental_Game_Conversation_Starter.pdf%20
🎯 FREE Training for Sports Moms: https://trainhergame.com/mom
📺 YouTube Playlist for Athletes: https://www.youtube.com/@AthleteMentalEdge
🎓 The Elite Mental Game (our self-paced mental training program): https://elitecompetitor.com/emg
🔔 Subscribe for more mental training tips for girl athletes ⬇️ Raising Elite Competitors YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@RaisingEliteCompetitors
P.S.
- Did you know that 70% of kids quit organized sports by age 13, with pressure and lack of enjoyment as primary reasons? (National Alliance for Youth Sports)
- Research shows that athletes with mental skills training demonstrate 45% greater improvement in performance consistency compared to those receiving only physical training. (Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, 2019)
- According to the Aspen Institute's Project Play, parents' post-game behavior is the #1 factor affecting whether young athletes continue in sports - ahead of coaching quality and playing time. (Aspen Institute, 2023)
- Studies show that 85% of elite athletes work with mental performance coaches or sports psychologists as part of their training regimen. (Sport, Exercise, and Performance Psychology, 202