• The Weird Ones

  • By: Steve Vernon
  • Narrated by: Daniel Dorse
  • Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
  • 3.2 out of 5 stars (5 ratings)

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The Weird Ones

By: Steve Vernon
Narrated by: Daniel Dorse
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Publisher's Summary

Some stories tiptoe up and whisper in your ear - all sweetness and gumdrops and happy-ever-after-after-there-you-go.

Then, there are the weird ones.

We're talking talking-chickens, blue plague spam monkeys, tug boats of unbridled and fetid fecundity, tulwar-swinging cab drivers, malls that maul you, gnawing on screwdrivers and jig-lining elder gods coming at you faster than a ride-on mow-down massacre mower shopping cart caravan.

This is a collection for the seriously messed up minds of all you listeners who have grown tired of the trite detritus of day-to-day storytelling. These are some of the weirdest, most messed up mind-bending kind of stories that have ever been written - and I'm daring you to listen to them now.

"Plague Monkey Spam" - a novella of spider-gods, storytelling and the kitchen sink. "Gnarly Ho-Tep Hoedown Two-step" - a story told over a hand of potato chip poker. "Hunger Time at the Midnight Mall" - a yarn of belly-grumble and fear. "The Last Curl of Gut Rope" - chicken, egg, chicken, egg, crack this riddle if you dare.

All of this wonderful madness is brought to you by Steve Vernon - the creator behind the cult novella classic - Long Horn, Big Shaggy: A Tale of Wild West Terror and Reanimated Buffalo.

©2011 Steve Vernon (P)2013 David N. Wilson

What listeners say about The Weird Ones

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NOVA SCOTIA SHITHOUSE LUCK

WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE, WHITE MAN.
The first story is a novella and is called Plague Monkey Spam. If it had been a lot shorter and a short story, it could easily have been a 5 star story, but the story just went on and on. It ended up sounding like a bad trip on drugs. The narrator has a creepy Garrison Kelior type of voice. At times it was cool and then after a while it became grating on the nerves. What I thought was going to be a five star story ended up just a 3 star.

Gnarly Ho-tep Hoedown two-step was very inventive and funny.

Hunger Time At the Midnite Mall was my favorite and was creepy

The Last Curl of Gut Rope was okay.

This book is not for everyone. It is interesting that it is titled the Weird Ones, as everything Vernon writes is weird.

13 people found this helpful

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hooked

This is I think the 3rd book I've listened to from Steve Vernon. It most assuredly will not be the last.
I very much enjoy the style and skill with which he writes. Weird, wonderful and fully of gritty grace. I'm never certain of where things are going to go but pleasantly awed with each bizarre turn of plot and and enamored with each turn of phrase.
I personally think the narration was perfect for this book. Well done to both narrator and author.

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The weird ones

This handful of short stories brings listeners into some strange worlds. The first story is a long one and could use some tightening up. In some parts my interest in the story began to lag. The other stories are short and unique. These tales certainly fit the title given to this collection. The plots of these stories pull you in, but I felt there were too many details included in them and I was frequently becoming bored with the stories. Narrator Daniel Dorse does a good job of keeping the narrative flowing and has some interesting voices for the characters.

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Average stories

The first story was really long and I had a hard time paying attention to most of it. The voice quality of the narrator got on my nerves a bit too. The remaining stories were short and I found them easier to pay attention to. Average stories with nothing really standing out in them.

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  • Norma Miles
  • 10-08-20

"There's always something bigger, Story Man."

Bobby received one of those scam emails - and answered it!
The result was , to say the least, surprising.
So much blue dung everywbere.
The sound of the words, as read, without attaching meaning, moulds into something mesmeric, mad but almost tangible. Almost anti erotic.
And I have no idea what it's all about.
All power to narrator, Daniel Dorse, who read with a deliciously understated delivery.

My thanks to the rights holder of The Weird Ones, who, at my request freely gifted me with a complimentary copy via Audiobook Boom. Definitely an odd one, not for the faint hearted. But certainly different. And weird!