The Way I Used to Be

By: Amber Smith

Narrated by: Rebekkah Ross

New York Times bestseller! In the tradition of Speak, Amber Smith's extraordinary debut novel “is a heart-twisting, but ultimately hopeful, exploration of how pain can lead to strength” (The Boston Globe).

Eden was always good at being good. Starting high school didn’t change who she was. But the night her brother’s best friend rapes her, Eden’s world capsizes.

What was once simple, is now complex. What Eden once loved—who she once loved—she now hates. What she thought she knew to be true, is now lies. Nothing makes sense anymore, and she knows she’s supposed to tell someone what happened but she can’t. So she buries it instead. And she buries the way she used to be.

Told in four parts—freshman, sophomore, junior, and senior year—this provocative debut reveals the deep cuts of trauma. But it also demonstrates one young woman’s strength as she navigates the disappointment and unbearable pains of adolescence, of first love and first heartbreak, of friendships broken and rebuilt, all while learning to embrace the power of survival she never knew she had hidden within her heart.

©2016 Amber Smith. All rights reserved. (P)2016 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved.

You should read it.

I listened to this audiobook in two days. Once I started it, I knew I couldn’t put it down anymore until I was done. I haven’t slept for an entire night, this is how good the book was.

First of all, I really thought the performance was perfect. The voice was smooth, and really helped to picture each scenes as if in reality.

The book is amazingly written although rape is quite difficult to write about. I felt it was well handled.
I must admit I cried throughout the entire book, but I still consider that it is such an important issue. Everyone one, including men, should read it only to better understand what can go through the mind of someone who was raped.

Plus I really enjoyed how Eden’s character was really complex, her mistakes only made her more reliable.

Intense

This book frustrated me. I found myself often yelling, "come on! Just tell them!" Or "Be honest with josh! Tell him you love him". Her relationship with josh had me tied in and made me angry sometimes when things didn't go nh way, but that's what makes this a great book. The way that a book can tie me in so quickly and having me feel real emotions over the story just shows how good it is. In my opinion, this was honest, brutally honest. The really shows how sexual assault can effect people and how hard it is to tell, especially when you know the person. The way I used to be had be tied in and I couldn't put it down. It was a great story and experience.

An amazing well told book

This book was amazing. It was so humbling because even if it was a fiction story things like this really happen. It is important to read this book. I powered through in 3 days.

Okay ending

The overall storyline was great kept me on my toes the entire time.
The ending was emotional but i wish we had more in the end after she …. I won’t ruin it but i needed more to feel satisfied after the reading !
Reading performance was great !

My heart

When your whole world falls apart due to your brother’s best friend and turns you into this person you don’t even recognize, turns you into someone you almost hate. No one understands why you are the way you are and all you want is for people to notice, all you want is for someone to hear you out. When you tried so hard to tell people and you feel like no one is listening. Eden was a kind girl who was quiet, people didn’t notice her and didn’t expect things from her. Until that night….

I loved this book, however, Eden annoyed me to no end. I get why she was the way she was but man she was hard for me. I just wanted to scream at her and be like say something! Tell someone what happen!! Make them listen to you! You have such a good support system and people who love you. But again she is in high school and is trying to navigate all her feelings.

Raw

This book is definitely one for those who can handle. It’s the raw reality that many of us women have lived. It gives an insight on how young women or women in general handle themselves after a traumatic experience. The way we use that experience against our own selves sometimes not understanding why we do the things we do. This book has allowed me to understand a past me that I never got the answer to up until now! Thank you so much to the author for sharing this with us I definitely recommend this book and wish that others can gain the same of not a similar experience.

If I hadn't been listening around people...

I would have been in tears by the end. but of course I didn't want to be the person who cried at the end of a book in a room full of onlookers.
The story feels so real. It never feels like you're being talked down to or like it's trying to glamorize the subject. It's definitely worth listening to; it just might be best to sit and listen to the last couple hours of the book alone with a box of tissues.

such an important story

this broke my heart to read but I think everyone should read this book. life changing.

It was a really nice listen

This book should definitely come with a trigger warning. But I really enjoyed it. Would recommend

Riveting

In 9th grade I remember reading Speak. It’s a book that still haunts me. The Way I Used to Be reminds me a lot of speak. The kind of book you read one time and can’t reread due to the nature of the content. This book is well written and I think does a good job of portraying sexual abuse and the aftermath from the victims perspective.