• The Very First Damned Thing

  • An Author-Read Audio Exclusive
  • By: Jodi Taylor
  • Narrated by: Jodi Taylor
  • Length: 2 hrs and 31 mins
  • 4.3 out of 5 stars (4,251 ratings)

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The Very First Damned Thing

By: Jodi Taylor
Narrated by: Jodi Taylor
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Publisher's summary

Audible is delighted to bring you an exclusive, author-read production of The Very First Damned Thing. Hear it here first, months ahead of the EBook publication.

Jodi Taylor reads the long-awaited prequel in her Chronicles of St Mary’s series, as Dr Bairstow struggles to set up St Mary’s as we know it in a world still scarred by the ravages of civil war.

Ever wondered how it all began? It’s two years since the final victory at the Battersea Barricades. The fighting might be finished, but for Dr Bairstow, just now setting up St Mary's, the struggle is only beginning.

How will he assemble his team? From where will his funding come? How can he overcome the massed ranks of the Society for the Protection of Historical Buildings? How do stolen furniture, a practical demonstration at the Stirrup Charge at Waterloo, students’ alcohol-ridden urine, a widowed urban guerrilla, a young man wearing exciting knitwear and four naked security guards all combine to become the St Mary’s of the future?

©2015 Jodi Taylor (P)2015 Audible Ltd.

Featured Article: The 10 Best Time Travel Book Series for Today


Time travel books are so entertaining because they meld exciting historical settings with big what if? questions. What if you knew what would happen next in your timeline? What if you could change history? What if you did change history? We’ve compiled an exciting list of the best time travel book series that are out now, all varying in tone and subgenre. We hope you’re ready to get lost in time!

What listeners say about The Very First Damned Thing

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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    2 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Wait for it on Kindle. Not the best on audio

This is a delightful short story "prequel" to the St. Mary's series. Any fan of the series should enjoy this short foray into St. Mary's past. Do NOT start the series with this title, however, as it will likely make no sense and not be very interesting. It really is meant for those who are already familiar with the series. That said, I would recommend waiting for the release of the kindle edition of the story rather than listening to the free audio on Audible. I'm very thankful to Ms. Taylor for offering this for free and I feel very bad saying it because I love her as an author, but reading the story herself did not do it any justice. She has a very pleasant voice but she does not do anything to distinguish between characters nor does she put much (if any) emotion into her voice. It makes for a rather dull reading and often a rather confusing one, as it is sometimes difficult to distinguish who is saying what. 4 stars for the story, but only 2 for the audio.

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56 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

WHY do you let authors read their work?

WHY, oh why do you let authors read their work? I completely LOVE Jodi Taylor s writing. She is clever, smart, funny, fun, detailed, creative, brilliant, original, etc, as a writer, but simply should not read her own book.

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31 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Loved the story. The narration was ehh...

Maybe I got spoiled with Zara Ramm's narration, as I read the entire main series before starting on the short stories. I know, I should have checked the reading order first, but didn't. Zara Ramm is a great narrator. In books 1-6, she did an excellent job with the different voices, the emotion, the sarcasm. While I love Jodi Taylor and she has a fan for life, it was difficult to listen to M.s Taylor after the exceptional job that Zara Ramm did in her narration of the other books. If I had listened to this one first, maybe my expectations would not have been so high, but... Jodi is articulate, clear and easy to listen to, but all of the voices and accents are the same, so they are very hard to differentiate. Other than that, I enjoyed hearing how Dr. Bairstow recruited all of his people and established St. Mary's.

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19 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

story shows promise, narration not so much.

I enjoyed the storyline love the humor but the narration put me into a stupor, not in a good way.

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8 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

5 stars, Love it!

Not easy for me to admit that I love St. Mary's books, guilty pleasure, please don't tell my tobacco chewing friends at work. But I do, and if you are new to this series please start with one narrated by Zara Ramm (most of them are) She is exceptional and her voice must be Max's. That's how I did it, now I'm hooked, and I can see how if this is your introduction to St. Mary's you might be a little put off. But for me already being part of the St. Mary's team, I wanted this back story, and I'm glad it was produced. Now I'm off to the bar at St. Mary's to visit the gang.

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7 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Beautifully phrased and clearly stated

A treat for the ears to listen to, and a story of romance and daring. I think I have just gotten hooked on another series.

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7 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

Not a great way to start this series...

I think this is a prequel that would have had more impact if I had read it after the first few books in the series. I picked this up for free on Audible and, while it was well-written, I was mostly confused by what was happening.

I listened to this on audiobook and the author reads it. Taylor did a good job reading it and I would recommend if you enjoy audiobooks.

This book follows a character named Dr Bairstow as he gathers funding and people for his time-traveling historical society that is being house in St. Mary's.

A lot of characters are introduced rapidly. The book is broken into very short vignettes that show how each of these characters comes to join Dr. Bairstow's group. Unfortunately, I haven't read any other books in the series and don't have any reference for all these characters, so this didn't have a lot of impact for me and was mostly just confusing.

Overall this was okay but a bit hard to follow and choppy for me. I might have to come back and reread this after I read some of the series itself. I guess I would recommend this to fans of the series who want some more background. However, it doesn’t seem to be a good starting point if you are just starting to read the series.

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6 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Too short . Loved it.

Highly recommend Jodi Taylor's The Chronicles of St. Mary's series- which are cleverly written & ,highly entertaining
All Jodi's novels are marvelous, and very addictive.
In her time travel series you will find humor , adventure, history, romance , & lovable characters .
Her Frogmorton Farm series is just as entertaining and fun . Once you start , you can't get enough.

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6 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Fabulous storyline

What did you love best about The Very First Damned Thing?

Everything, the story is like a roller coaster, it's exciting, dramatic, funny. I can't wait until the next episode.

Who was your favorite character and why?

Malcolm, he is so funny and he is always getting into trouble.

What does Jodi Taylor bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

She brings her story to life, more authors should narrate their stories.

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

Yes. I almost did.

Any additional comments?

Love this fun series.

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5 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    2 out of 5 stars

Boring

Maybe its good for the readers of the series. As it was free, I thought it would be a good introduction to the books. The humor is fine; witty brit humor, actually. But the story is boring. At least, not engaging. I didn’t feel compelled at all to keep reading. Maybe some other time.

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2 people found this helpful

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    4 out of 5 stars
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  • kate
  • 10-26-15

Don't start the series with this book

What did you like most about The Very First Damned Thing?

I loved that it filled in gaps I hadn't even realised existed!

What about Jodi Taylor’s performance did you like?

As others have said, she's not Zara Ramm, and it takes time to acclimatise. Jodi reads the book perfectly well, but she reads it, where Zara perfomrs and brings it to life. As I got into the story, I forgot that and it was fine.

Any additional comments?

Do not start the series with this book. Read them in the order they were written. This book would make abvsolutely no sense iff you hadn't read the others.

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45 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Robyn
  • 11-29-16

An intro....not much more

I heartily agree with other reviewers:

1 ) Don't start the series with this book - it's not the best first impression and may well turn you off the other books - which are really fun stuff.

2) Narration is fine, but better left to Zara

This book is very much a prequel, setting the back story to St Mary's, however, in order to appreciate the little bits of humour, you do need to have listened to and have an appreciation of the normal antics of St Marys - otherwise the humour / references will seem flat and out of place.

Jodi Taylor narrates her own work, which is admirable, and there is nothing obviously wrong with it - however, if you've listened to the other books in the series, it's immediately apparent that this narration lacks some of the energy and quirkiness which Zara's narration lends to the series. Given that the other books are told from Max's point of view, and this one told by Dr Bairstow, it makes sense to have a different narrator, however perhaps a male narrator would have been more appropriate? Jodi does a good enough job though, and as the author, I respect her choice to narrate it herself.

If you're a fan of the series, then you'll enjoy the back story, and the first meetings with some of the future key characters. It was a freebie download from audible, and therefore worth topping up my St Mary's catalogue with. Not sure it would be worth a full credit on its own though.....

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40 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars
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  • Sparks
  • 12-02-15

Sorry could not finish it

What disappointed you about The Very First Damned Thing?

The narration was so very poor, and did not flow, resulting in a disjointed story

Would you ever listen to anything by Jodi Taylor again?

I love Jodi Taylors books by the original narrator

What didn’t you like about Jodi Taylor’s performance?

Jodi Taylor may be a very good writer but her narration was amateur, with pauses in the wrong place, the intonation in her voice was all wrong, There was no emotion in the narration, and it left me feeling cheated

What character would you cut from The Very First Damned Thing?

no characters, just the narrator

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12 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Tsp967
  • 12-10-15

Brilliant but please, leave the narration to Zara

Would you listen to The Very First Damned Thing again? Why?

Yes, because the St Marys Chronicle are so enjoyable

What other book might you compare The Very First Damned Thing to, and why?

All of the stories are enjoyable

Would you be willing to try another one of Jodi Taylor’s performances?

With reservations

Any additional comments?

I love the humour in these books and with the deletion of some "yes sirs" are fast and witty. The historical pieces are so original but please, after all the stories and the incredibly generous freebies I have become so used to the quick, theatrical narration, leave it to the very excellent Zara Ramm

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11 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Crackdown
  • 10-20-15

A nice story giving background to St Mary's

This is a nice little filler story giving the background as to how St Mary's was set up.

Really the summary given by Audible sums it up, so I won't add anything further on that.

Onto performance.

What differs this time is the change in narrator. Up until now Zara Ramm has been the narrator for these stories. Yet this time the narration is taken on by the author herself. There are always pitfalls whenever an author does this, but actually, despite the fact Jodi Taylor is not a professional narrator, it doesn't detract too badly at all. I've heard far worse, including some so called professional narrators who couldn't narrate their way out of a wet paper bag!

What Jodi Taylor does is keep it simple. So, for example, there are no false tries at creating different accents for different characters. Also, (if you've heard the other stories) once you've been listening for a while you don't try and superimpose the accents you associate with the characters that Zara Ramm has placed in your head. And by the end that also makes it more enjoyable.

Plus, let's face it; this story is currently being listed free, and for a freebie there is not really any cause for complaint.

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11 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Jean Mc
  • 07-16-17

Read very badly

What did you like best about The Very First Damned Thing? What did you like least?

I enjoyed the story but would not listen to another read by the author.

Who was your favorite character and why?

All the usual St Mary's characters.

Would you be willing to try another one of Jodi Taylor’s performances?

Absolutely not.

If this book were a film would you go see it?

Possibly if combined with other St Mary's stories.

Any additional comments?

Had I realised how bad the reading was I'd have bought this on kindle.

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7 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Sharon
  • 02-07-17

Not the first book in the series

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes - another excellent chapter in the St Mary's world. Listen to the stories in the correct order as other reviewers have said. You needed to know some history of St Mary's before you get to this part of the story, although I enjoyed listening to how it all came together, and there was a short history jump as well.

What other book might you compare The Very First Damned Thing to, and why?

Just like all the other books in the series.... history and adventure but remember, it's not about time travel!

Which character – as performed by Jodi Taylor – was your favourite?

Like others, I'm use to Zara Ramm narrating these characters. However, Ms Taylor did an excellent job in her own right. The narration was clear and easy to follow ... what more do you want for the narrator?

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7 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Jen
  • 12-06-15

Great filling back story for loved characters

I really enjoyed listening to how some of the regular St Mary's team came to belong. As other reviews have mentioned this is read by Jodi Taylor so it may take a bit of adapting to a different voice reading the much loved characters.

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6 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
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  • Bug Eyes
  • 12-11-15

Poor narration 😕

Never made it past the first 30 minutes. The author's narration is bland and nothing like the lively novels she writes.

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5 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • caradoc
  • 12-01-15

Enjoyed this

Jodi Taylor writes well, and in this short story she gives some insight into the beginnings of it all. It was read well and I very much enjoyed it.

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  • Kaz
  • 11-03-17

Best to read this out of order

This book is marked as 0.5 in the series and indeed, in chronological order it does come first (yes, I do realise that for this series stating that there is a chronological order is almost contradictory). However, I only came across this book after reading the first two in the series and I believe that reading those two first gave me a lot more insight, and enjoyment, than I would have had if I had truly read this one first.

I love these books by Jodi Taylor, but I woods urge you to read this particular one out of its numbered sequence in order to get the most from the story. Having said that, this book gives you an understanding of the history of St Mary's and Dr Barstow's role in setting up the zany institution.

Finally, I have become accustomed to hearing the stories narrated by another narrator and was slightly less enthusiastic in hearing the author narrate her own book. Nothing wrong with her reading of course, it was simply different to the usual narrator.

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6 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    2 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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  • Karen Campbell
  • 07-11-21

Better read than listened to

Even though this is a prequel, it is better read after the first book. The story is not terribly engaging and if you did not know what was to come next, this book would not entice you to continue. If you have read the first book, then it is fun to see how all of the characters began.
Although it is written with Jodi Taylor's usual engaging mix of fun and pathos, her delivery as a narrator is very wooden and detracts from the story. I am sure I would have appreciated some moments of the plot much more had it been delivered with the enthusiasm the characters deserve.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Thomas Blackman-Bishop
  • 06-07-19

An Exciting Begining

this free short story drew me into a whirlwind adventure I would not escape from for months.
Terrible and beautiful, I am glad I took the time to listen.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Andrew Kereopa
  • 05-27-19

👍

Thanks for your books. You’re a good writer. Especially love the free stuff! Keep it up.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Kerin James
  • 07-18-23

A Rollicking Read

Loved this one. Pacy. Great premise. Fun. A heroine that is witty, sarcastic, smart and tough.
Having just discovered this series, now I’ll have to read them all! Magnificent narration.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
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  • Readalot
  • 01-02-23

Prequel

This prequel to the Chronicles of St Mary's explains some things about how and why Dr Bairstow set up St Mary's but leaves me in the dark about others. I've read quite a few of the series, including most of the short stories, and this one was a welcome addition. Read by the author, it sounds a bit different from Zara Ramm's rendition of the others, but it was fun. Time Travel (although they don't want you to call it that) is involved as a man travels back from the future to set up the organisation he manages in that future. Confused? So am I! Mind, a bit of confusion never hurt anyone in St Mary's.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
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  • Kindle Customer
  • 10-06-22

Funny. Would have preferred a different narrator.

This was my first experience of this series and I don't think it is a good place to start. Apart from the opening narrative, which took time to grab me, but did eventually pull me in,, the rest of the book is bitty. I imagine if you already love these characters, all this would be completely forgivable.

The author is clear and adequate as a narrator, but an actor who performed the book, rather than just read it aloud, would have enhanced the humour that suffuses the book, with a few laugh out loud moments. I think if I read it to myself, or an actor had performed it, there would have been many more embarrassing snorting laughs.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Tim Pate
  • 09-01-22

Spot on

Great story learning how the Saint Mary's thing all started. it is worth the read.

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars
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  • Onyajay
  • 11-23-21

Like listening to the minutes of and AGM

I bet I would love this story, if it had been narrated by someone other than Ms. Taylor who should stick to her day job.
She simply hasn't got the knack of expression, voices, or inflection....and conversly over pronounces words.
She probably thinks she has a nice voice. She does, for a conversation. It's boring for narration, which is like acting.
I'm only 1.5hrs into it, I just heard her say...."Look...oh....Look..." in the most monotone way I nearly laughed out loud.
No more self narrations Jodi.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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  • Amazon Customer
  • 07-28-21

Very well written

Really enjoying this book. It's a great start to a series for someone like me. It has kept me wanting for more and I am finding it very hard to "put down". I can't wait to find out what happens in the next installment.

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