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Publisher's Summary

Three words: Vampires versus Sasquatch.

Bill Ryder: undead geek, dateless dweeb, and legendary vampire is back in his wildest adventure yet.

A war is brewing between ancient enemies from the dawn of time. If it can’t be stopped, the veil will be lifted and all of humanity’s darkest nightmares will be unleashed to wreak havoc. Bill and his friends are the only chance we have... Lord help us all!

The vampire nation dispatches Bill to a faraway land to broker peace, but it’s not going to be easy. His enemies want him dead. Hell, some of his allies do too. Danger lurks at every turn and in places where he least expects it.

Now Bill must rely on his friends, master his fledgling powers, and use every four-letter word in his arsenal to stop the war, uncover the conspiracy, and solve the mystery that lies at the heart of the Mourning Woods.

The Mourning Woods: The Tome of Bill, Part 3 is a foul-mouthed horror hilarity by Rick Gualtieri, author of Bill the Vampire and Scary Dead Things.

©2012 Rick Gualtieri (P)2013 Rick Gualtieri

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Cliff
  • madison, MS, United States
  • 08-16-13

The title says it all.

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

Yes. it was funny and I enjoyed it. The humor is good and I like the way the series pokes fun at all the tropes that have taken over all the other vampire novels.

What did you like best about this story?

The snarky humor. I actually did a spit take in the gym when listening to the scene where Bill meets the chieftan of the feet.

Would you listen to another book narrated by Christopher John Fetherolf?

Definitely.

Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?

It definitely made me laugh out loud in several section and I don't do that very often.

Any additional comments?

If you are a fan of the romantic vampire stories which now dominate the genre then stay away from this one. This is primarily for guys. The humor is low-brow bathroom/gamer humor. The book is name mourning woods for goodness sake! If you want angst ridden vampires falling in love with a plucky heroine against their better judgement, or sparkly emo-vampires this isn't for you. Then again, if you have already read the first two books you already know what the series is about. If you like the others you will like this one if you didn't don't bother.I would say that by then end some of the jokes were getting a bit repetitious which is why I gave the story 4 stars instead of 5. Also, there are some technical issues with the recording. The voice will sound very close one minute and far away the next. Also, in several sections a paragraph was repeated twice. Hence the lower value for performance.

2 of 2 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Bill is the coolest Vampire!!

I love the mix of Horror and humor Rick Gualtieri puts into his writing. All three of these books are fresh , original, a bit scary and downright hilarious. I love it give us more!!

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Dave
  • Upper Tantallon, NS, Canada
  • 06-08-13

Road Trip to the Great White North

Free Will Bill and company head north to my native land (Canada) as the vampire nation's last chance to avoid a war with big foot. Doctor Death the Diplomat's task is further complicated by the French vampire, Francious, the vampire ruling Canada. Control the maple and control Canada. "Tom" Hortons and "eh" punctuation hilarity ensue. Bill continues his inventive manipulation of his 4-letter vocabulary while Sally proves whose the "Alpha" in their relationship.

This series has become a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. The more I enjoy it, the more I fear my PC quotient is failing. For some reason I find this addictive series 100 proof entertainment; maybe it's because its "juvenile" humour makes me feel young again. The Tomes of Bill is a paranormal parody poking pun at packing, prods, paramores, politics, and peaceniks. Blobs, Bullwinkle, Draculas, environmentalists, french, human friends, nerds, ninjas, Scooby-doo, tree-huggers, vampires, yeti, witches, zombies, no beings are sacred.

The ending cries out for another Doctor Death adventure. This was the best performance yet by narrator Christopher John Fetherolf . He really nailed the "outrrrageous" french accent a la Monty Python. Christopher John Fetherolf has become Free Will Bill's voice and I really hope he continues as the narrator.

Strap on your little boy shorts and enjoy.

1 of 1 people found this review helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Best in series yet

I have to say I enjoyed this more than the second book. Enjoying the series, the humor, action, drama, gore, and even the love stories going on.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

cursing

If not for the Lords name in vain I would love it and give 5 stars

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars

Too much misogyny and too many morons

Maybe I am just too sensitive to misogyny and morons these days. The book was never going to be deep but insulting is an entirely different level.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

awesome

recommend the entire series!
waiting for the newest one, can't wait to see how the story goes







  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • CF
  • 04-01-16

good

good book, plot is moving along at a nice pace. how for more in the series

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

HOLY SHIT

I have to admit, this isn't my favorite series-a lot of the jokes are too immature for my taste-but I decided to stick it out for one more book, and I'm glad I did. Yes, the immature jokes are still there, but this book kicked the plot into overdrive. Especially that ending! Okay, Bill-I'll finish your tome.

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

A Lot of fun, but not great literature

I like the Tome of Bill series, and this one delivered at the same level as the previous books.
is it ever going to be considered a classic?, made into a big budget Hollywood blockbuster? or make the list of books to read before you die? ...emphatically no.
it is however a lot of fun and makes for an entertaining read.
My only real gripe about it is the author's brutal and unnessessary use of the word "thus".

The narration is good and keeps faithfully to the characters. ..you can almost see Sally's eye rolls.