The Love and Lies of Rukhsana Ali

By: Sabina Khan

Narrated by: Richa Shukla

Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins

Publisher's summary

With a welcome mix of humor, heart, and high-stakes drama, Sabina Khan provides a timely and honest portrait of what it's like to grow up feeling unwelcome in your own culture.

Seventeen-year-old Rukhsana Ali tries her hardest to live up to her conservative Muslim parents' expectations, but lately she's finding that impossible to do. She rolls her eyes when they blatantly favor her brother and saves her crop tops and makeup for parties her parents don't know about. Luckily, only a few more months stand between her carefully monitored life in Seattle and her new life at Caltech. But when her parents catch her kissing her girlfriend Ariana, all of Rukhsana's plans fall apart.

Her parents are devastated and decide to whisk Rukhsana off to Bangladesh, where she is thrown headfirst into a world of arranged marriages and tradition. Through reading her grandmother's old diary, Rukhsana gains some much-needed perspective and realizes she must find the courage to fight for her love without losing the connection to her family as a consequence.

©2019 Sabina Khan (P)2019 Scholastic Inc.

I loved parts of it but overall it was just okay

I felt like there were pacing issues and the need to tie everything up in a nice how kind of ruined the story. There was also a lot of information that we get that really didn't do anything to enhance the story. Rukhsana's friends from school and girlfriend were trash and honestly I kept waiting for her to realize that she deserved better, but that didn't happen.

Surprising

I found this story to be refreshingly different. I enjoyed that it wasn’t the typical middle eastern culture we see in literature and that the protagonist’s story isn’t one I’ve encountered often. Overall, I feel this book is a gem of a find despite the tough topics it addresses.

Honestly Disturbing

Very endearing and unpredictable. Realistic assumptions of naive friends who love the only way they are able.

love it!!!!

it was amazing!
THIS IS A MOOD. I totes recommend it!
great on rainy days.

i love this book so much. it’s so inspiring

hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi poop as well no but i

Sabina the life slayer...

This book was heavy. It dealt with generational sexual abuse, homophobia, conversion therapy, cultural expectations, arranged marriages, colorism, I almost want to ask what didn't it bring up.

This story followed a Bengali-Bangladeshi American teen who was a lesbian. She'd always dealt with being less than her brother, or having different expectations than him, even though she actually cared about going to a great college, and it wasn't necessarily his dream to. He was so supportive, and to be honest, outside of her parents(initially) most her family was supportive of her queerness. However, since she wasn't out, and dating a white girl who knew NOTHING about what it was like to be in a conservative South Asian family and community, since she was a teenager, she didn't always make decisions that would have hide her secret long enough to get her until college before them finding out.

Upon her parents learning she was queer, they didn't react well to it, forcing the heroine to see a side to her parents she'd never seen. She didn't realize how liberal they'd been raising her, as soon after she was forced to stay in Bangladesh to care for her ailing grandmother.

There she finds out it was a hoax to attempt to marry her, as each attempt she makes to leave her family are met with a lot of walls. She has this beautiful culture shown through food, clothes, members of her family and community, but so much of her livelihood is beind taken away until she accepts an engagement.

I think I understood where her mother and father were coming from. So much of communities of color struggle with honor and respect, and saving face and we all haven't caught up with the times, especially her conservative Asian born parents. But what I didnt expect was her mother, who the entire book had been set up to be this horrible villain, to have her own terrible trauma she'd lived through, that it made me feel like American born PoCs dont make strong efforts to understand where their parents are coming from.

Even me, I struggle hearing and coming to terms with my mother's abuse as a child, because as a teen I'd forget she was a person before I was born, so I could totally relate to that narrative.

The standout character, her potential husband was so amazing. I didn't love how his character was handled, but I think it highlighted a very real and dangerous reality for many queer people living in conservative countries.

This story was so amazing, but so horrible in how it didn't hide what I know about South Asian culture(really strong colorism.anti-blackness) abuse, physical, mental, emotional and sexual, even family members.

This book was so important, I can't say I walked in thinking it was going to be as good as it was. I'm so amazed at the story, I really hope a sophomore effort comes soon, because we need more stories like this, and so much Asian rep is told from an East Asian perspective.

It was hard for everyone in this book. I don't think a single person didn't suffer throughout this story. I'm hesitant to give stories that focus on brown and black pain a lot words, but I don't think my review did how well this book was done, justice.

Coming of age story

Honestly I love everything about this story. I love how dynamic the main character is and how the story evoked a range of emotions. I truly felt like my friend was telling me a story rather than I was reading a story. Rukhsana is a very lovable character from the start though- she had moments towards the end where I wasn’t found of her. Her parents were loveable as well and I was cheering them on as they made THE right choice to accept their daughter. I 100% whole heartedly recommend this book to all book lovers.

love this!! 💕 💗

Rukhsana is a great role model and she is so brave. Throughout the whole book, the text made me feel as if I was right there in the story. This is such an amazing book. I loved how there were many different characters, but the author went into detail about each and every one of them so it wasn’t hard to keep track of them. For younger listeners be aware, for there is some bad language and slightly (not really though) explicit descriptions.
TOTALLY RECOMMEND! thx audible!

A little small minded

Bangladeshi people are not narrow minded as this book suggests.Also they do not condone the fact that girls need to be married right after 18 so sorry.

Just Okay, Flawed

This story was not believable and at times annoying. Rukhsana was a self-centered brat for a lot of the story. Even her empathy for her mother was unconvincing and shallow. Rukhsana and Ariana were not a good couple. Only a self-centered teenager would create that much upheaval for such a relationship. I usually like YA lit but this character wasn't convincing. The reader mispronounced Arabic words. I need to ask my Bengali friends about dowry in their culture because in the Muslim religion the dowry is paid to the bride, not her family and certainly not to the groom's family.