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The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be
- A Speculative Memoir of Transracial Adoption
- Narrated by: Shannon Gibney
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
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The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be
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Publisher's summary
Part memoir, part speculative fiction, The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be explores the often surreal experience of growing up as a mixed-Black transracial adoptee.
Dream Country author Shannon Gibney returns with The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be, a book woven from her true story of growing up as a mixed-Black transracial adoptee and fictional story of Erin Powers, the name Shannon was given at birth, a child raised by a white, closeted lesbian.
At its core, the novel is a tale of two girls on two different timelines occasionally bridged by a mysterious portal and their shared search for a complete picture of their origins. Gibney surrounds that story with reproductions of her own adoption documents, letters, family photographs, interviews, medical records, and brief essays on the surreal absurdities of the adoptee experience.
The end result is a remarkable portrait of an American experience rarely depicted in any form.
* This audiobook includes a downloadable PDF of images, documents and resources from the book.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
Critic reviews
★ "An ambitiously authentic adoption story where fiction does the work of truth, and archives, correspondence, and health records provide the roots of fantasy."—Kirkus Reviews, starred review
★ "A fantastical, transcendent memory collage that shirks convention in search of what is real and true about familial bonds."—PW, starred review
★ "Readers will praise the raw honesty and insight in this lovingly crafted memoir."—Booklist, starred review
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Leigh is the mother of high-achieving, popular high school senior Kara. Their relationship is already strained for reasons Leigh does not fully understand when, in a moment of carelessness, Kara makes a mistake that ends in tragedy, the effects of which not only divide Leigh's family, but polarize the entire community.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Obnoxious musical interludes ruin the story
- By Joan on 12-25-11
By: Laura Moriarty
-
He Came in with It
- A Portrait of Motherhood and Madness
- By: Miriam Feldman
- Narrated by: Ann Richardson
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 59
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 54
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 53
In an idyllic Los Angeles neighborhood, where generations enjoy deep roots in old homes, the O’Rourke family fits right in. Miriam and Craig are both artists and their four children carry on the legacy. When their teenage son, Nick, is diagnosed with schizophrenia, a tumultuous decade ensues in which the family careens off the conventional course. Like the 10 Biblical plagues, they are hit by one catastrophe after another: violence, evictions, arrests, a suicide attempt, a near-drowning - even cancer and a brain tumor - play against the backdrop of a wild teenage bacchanal.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So Beautifully Written
- By Michael on 08-01-22
By: Miriam Feldman
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Lifted by the Great Nothing
- By: Karim Dimechkie
- Narrated by: Neil Shah
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 48
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 46
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 46
Max doesn't remember his mother, who was murdered by burglars before they emigrated from Beirut to New Jersey. He lives with his father, Rasheed, who is enamored of his concept of American culture - baseball and barbeques - and tries to shed his Lebanese heritage completely.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Excellent
- By Cheyenne on 06-13-15
By: Karim Dimechkie
-
The End and Other Beginnings
- Stories from the Future
- By: Veronica Roth
- Narrated by: Emily Rankin, MacLeod Andrews
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 52
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 46
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 46
No world is like the other. Within this masterful collection, each setting is more strange and wonderful than the last, brimming with new technologies and beings. And yet, for all the advances in these futuristic lands, the people still must confront deeply human problems. In these six stories, Veronica Roth reaches into the unknown and draws forth something startlingly familiar and profoundly beautiful.
By: Veronica Roth
-
Introductions
- The Academy: The Ghost Bird, Book 1
- By: C. L. Stone
- Narrated by: Natalie Eaton
- Length: 6 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 375
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 344
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 341
With an agoraphobic mother and a barely-there father, Sang abhors the isolation keeping her in the shadows. The only thing Sang craves is a fresh start and to be accepted as ordinary by her peers, because for her being different meant being cast out alone. When her family moves to a new school district, Sang infiltrates a group of boys nearly perfect in every way.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Great story, great listen
- By Twinmom on 04-13-18
By: C. L. Stone
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Vivian Apple at the End of the World
- By: Katie Coyle
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 42
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 39
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 39
Seventeen-year-old Vivian Apple never believed in the evangelical Church of America, unlike her recently devout parents. But when Vivian returns home the night after the supposed 'Rapture,' all that's left of her parents are two holes in the roof. Suddenly, she doesn't know who or what to believe. With her best friend Harp and a mysterious ally, Peter, Vivian embarks on a desperate cross-country road trip through a paranoid and panic-stricken America to find answers.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
juvenile
- By emily on 12-16-19
By: Katie Coyle
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One True Thing
- By: Anna Quindlen
- Narrated by: Christina Moore
- Length: 9 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 561
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 448
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 448
A young woman sits in jail, accused of the mercy killing of her dying mother. She didn't do it, but she thinks she knows who did. In the last months of her life, Ellen Gulden's mother revealed startling secrets that challenged everything Ellen believed about her family. Now, in jail, Ellen believes those secrets will tell her who had the courage to end her mother's suffering.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Quindlen's writing skills shine in One True Thing.
- By Bonny on 08-26-13
By: Anna Quindlen
-
Magic Hour
- By: Kristin Hannah
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 14 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 10,047
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 9,095
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 9,055
In the rugged Pacific Northwest lies the Olympic National Forest - nearly a million acres of impenetrable darkness and impossible beauty. From deep within this old growth forest, a six-year-old girl appears. Speechless and alone, she offers no clue as to her identity, no hint of her past.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Horrible narration
- By Howard Egan on 12-27-20
By: Kristin Hannah
-
Color Me In
- By: Natasha Díaz
- Narrated by: Bahni Turpin
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 94
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 85
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 84
Growing up in an affluent suburb of New York City, 16-year-old Nevaeh Levitz never thought much about her biracial roots. When her Black mom and Jewish dad split up, she relocates to her mom's family home in Harlem and is forced to confront her identity for the first time. Nevaeh wants to get to know her extended family, but because she inadvertently passes as white, her cousin thinks she's too privileged, pampered, and selfish to relate to the injustices African Americans face on a daily basis.
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3 out of 5 stars
-
Mixed feelings about this book
- By Rachel Kohlbrenner on 02-02-20
By: Natasha Díaz
-
Await Your Reply
- A Novel
- By: Dan Chaon
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 10 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall3.5 out of 5 stars 257
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 141
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 140
Three strangers who are trying to find their way in the wake of loss become entwined in an identity theft scheme, which has a resounding impact on them all. A gorgeously written psychological study, and a meditation on identity in the modern world, this is a literary novel with the haunting momentum of a thriller.
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2 out of 5 stars
-
Well Narrated, but Thoroughly Depressing
- By Rob Prindle on 12-04-09
By: Dan Chaon
-
What Happens Next
- By: Christina Suzann Nelson
- Narrated by: Rebecca Quinn Robertson
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 261
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 233
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 233
Popular podcaster and ex-reporter Faith Byrne has made a name for herself telling stories of greatness after tragedy—but her real life does not mirror the stories she tells. When she's asked to spotlight her childhood best friend's missing person case on her podcast, she uncovers desperate secrets and must face the truth before she can move forward.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Enjoyed This!
- By Freida Keith on 05-14-23
-
True Biz
- A Novel
- By: Sara Novic
- Narrated by: Lisa Flanagan, Kaleo Griffith
- Length: 10 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,129
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 996
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 993
True biz? The students at the River Valley School for the Deaf just want to hook up, pass their history finals, and have politicians, doctors, and their parents stop telling them what to do with their bodies. This revelatory novel plunges listeners into the halls of a residential school for the deaf, where they’ll meet Charlie, a rebellious transfer student who’s never met another deaf person before; Austin, the school’s golden boy, whose world is rocked when his baby sister is born hearing; and February, the hearing headmistress.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
The best book about Deaf experience!
- By Yasmine on 04-15-22
By: Sara Novic
-
Breaking the Silence
- By: Diane Chamberlain
- Narrated by: Justine Eyre
- Length: 10 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 589
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 527
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 527
Laura Brandon's promise to her dying father was simple: to visit an elderly woman she'd never heard of before. A woman who remembers nothing-except the distant past. Visiting Sarah Tolley seemed a small enough sacrifice to make. But Laura's promise results in another death: her husband's. And after their five-year-old daughter, Emma, witnesses her father's suicide, Emma refuses to talk about it - to talk at all.Frantic and guilt ridden, Laura contacts the only person who may be able to help.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
can't listen to the narrator
- By Sandy on 01-05-15
-
Brass Ring
- By: Diane Chamberlain
- Narrated by: Meredith Mitchell
- Length: 14 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 174
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 160
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 160
Perpetual optimist Claire Harte-Mathias and her disabled husband, Jon, run a successful foundation to help people with spinal cord injuries. One night Claire witnesses a woman leaping to her death from a bridge, and the tragedy sparks murky childhood memories that leave her confused and frightened. As Claire becomes obsessed with trying to understand the power the haunting memories have over her, she's torn between blocking them from her mind entirely and trying to unearth their source.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
Disappointed with this one
- By Scott on 03-22-16
-
The Great Failure
- A Bartender, a Monk, and My Unlikely Path to Truth
- By: Natalie Goldberg
- Narrated by: Natalie Goldberg
- Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 30
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 23
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 22
"The Great Failure is a boundless embrace, leaving nothing out. I wanted to learn the truth, to become whole. If I could touch the dark nature in someone else, I could know it in myself." So begins Natalie Goldberg in this candid exploration of her life. Here, Goldberg makes sense of primary relationships between father and daughter, teacher and student, and exemplifies the accomplishment available when creating daily writing practices.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
If you have been let down by anyone. Listen
- By Mia on 04-19-18
By: Natalie Goldberg
-
The McAvoy Sisters Book of Secrets
- A Novel
- By: Molly Fader
- Narrated by: Nancy Peterson
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 48
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 42
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 42
It’s been 17 years since the tragic summer the McAvoy sisters fell apart. Lindy, the wild one, left home, carved out a new life in the city, and never looked back. Delia, the sister who stayed, became a mother herself, raising her daughters and running the family shop in their small Ohio hometown on the shores of Lake Erie. But now, with their mother’s ailing health and a rebellious teenager to rein in, Delia has no choice but to welcome Lindy home.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Great story
- By Nessa on 09-25-23
By: Molly Fader
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Ian Gray isn’t supposed to have a dog, but a lot of things that shouldn’t happen end up happening anyway. And Gather, Ian’s adopted pup, is good company now that Ian has to quit the basketball team, find a job, and take care of his mom as she tries to overcome her opioid addiction. Despite the obstacles thrown their way, Ian is determined to keep his family afloat no matter what it takes. And for a little while, things are looking up: Ian makes friends, and his fondness for the outdoors and for fixing things lands him work helping neighbors.
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By the time Effie Galanos starts her senior year, it feels like she’s already been thinking about college applications for an eternity—after all, finding a college that will be the perfect fit and be accessible enough for Effie to navigate in her wheelchair presents a ton of considerations that her friends don’t have to worry about. What Effie hasn’t told anyone is that she already knows exactly what school she has her heart set on: a college in NYC with a major in Mass Media & Society that will set her up perfectly for her dream job in digital media.
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2019. Moud is an out gay teen living in Los Angeles with his distant father, Saeed. When Moud gets the news that his grandfather in Iran is dying, he accompanies his dad to Tehran, where the revelation of family secrets will force Moud into a new understanding of his history, his culture, and himself.
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An inspiring surprise
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Eagle Drums
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As his family prepares for winter, a young, skilled hunter must travel up the mountain to collect obsidian for knapping—the same mountain where his two older brothers died. When he reaches the mountaintop, he is immediately confronted by a terrifying eagle god named Savik. Savik gives the boy a choice: follow me or die like your brothers. What comes next is a harrowing journey to the home of the eagle gods and unexpected lessons on the natural world, the past that shapes us, and the community that binds us.
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Rhea's neighborhood is fading away—the mom-and-pop shops of her childhood forced out to make space for an artisanal kombucha brewery here, a hot yoga studio there. And everywhere, the feeling that this place is no longer meant for her. Because while their little corner of South L.A. isn't perfect, to Rhea and her two best friends, it's something even more important—it's home. And it's worth protecting. But as more white people flock to their latest edgy, urban paradise, more of Rhea's friends and family are pushed out. Until Rhea decides it's time to push back.
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Max and Jay have always depended on one another for their survival. Growing up with a physically abusive father, the two Bribri American brothers have learned that the only way to protect themselves and their mother is to stick to a schedule and keep their heads down. But when they hear a classmate in trouble in the woods, instinct takes over and they intervene, breaking up a fight and beating their high school's star soccer player to a pulp. This act of violence threatens the brothers' dreams for the future and their beliefs about who they are.
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The Fire, the Water, and Maudie McGinn
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Maudie always looks forward to the summers she spends in California with her dad. But this year, she must keep a troubling secret about her home life—one that her mom warned her never to tell. Maudie wants to confide in her dad about her stepdad's anger, but she’s scared. When a wildfire strikes, Maudie and her dad are forced to evacuate to the beach town where he grew up. It’s another turbulent wave of change. But now, every morning, from their camper, Maudie can see surfers bobbing in the water. She desperately wants to learn, but could she ever be brave enough?
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5 out of 5 stars
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One of the best books featuring at autistic character I have read!
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All the Fighting Parts
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Sixteen-year-old Amina Conteh has always believed in using her tongue as her weapon—even when it gets her into trouble. After cursing at a classmate, her father forces her to volunteer at their church with Pastor Johnson. But Pastor Johnson isn’t the holy man everyone thinks he is. The same voice Amina uses to fight falls quiet the night she is sexually assaulted by Pastor Johnson. After that, her life starts to unravel: her father is frustrated that her grades are slipping, and her best friend and boyfriend don’t understand why the once loud and proud girl is now quiet and distant.
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The Hard Parts
- A Memoir of Courage and Triumph
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story5 out of 5 stars 28
Oksana Masters, the United States’ most decorated winter Paralympic or Olympic athlete, tells her jaw-dropping story of triumphing over extraordinary Chernobyl disaster-caused physical challenges to create a life that, by example, challenges everyone to push through what is holding them back. This is Oksana’s astonishing story of journeying through a series of dark tunnels—and how, with her mother’s love, she finally found her way into the light. Her message to anyone who doesn’t fit in: you can find a place where you excel—where you have worth.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Amazing reminder of the power of determination and perseverance to succeed and not fall into Victim mode.
- By N on 01-21-24
By: Oksana Masters, and others
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The Prince & the Coyote
- By: David Bowles, Amanda Mijangos - illustrator
- Narrated by: Johnny Rey Diaz
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall0 out of 5 stars 0
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Performance0 out of 5 stars 0
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Story0 out of 5 stars 0
Mexico. 1418. Meet Prince Acolmiztli. Puma of the Acolhua People. Heir to his father’s throne. Half Acolhuan, half Mexica. Singer. Warrior. Poet. Sixteen years old. And now, betrayed. A palace plot, placed by the deadly Tepaneca Empire, kills his mother and siblings, puts his father’s army into retreat, and sends Prince Acolmiztli into a treacherous exile. Battling hunger, snow-swept mountains, and the machinations of the city-states all around him, Prince Acolmiztli vows revenge.
By: David Bowles, and others
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Elf Dog and Owl Head
- By: M.T. Anderson
- Narrated by: Pete Cross
- Length: 4 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 7
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 7
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Story5 out of 5 stars 7
Clay has had his fill of home life. A global plague has brought the world to a screeching halt, and with little to look forward to but a summer of video-calling friends, vying with annoying sisters for the family computer, and tuning out his parents’ financial worries, he’s only too happy to retreat to the woods. From the moment the elegant little dog with the ornate collar appears like an apparition among the trees, Clay sees something uncanny in her.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Perfect for dog lovers and adventurers
- By Susan Van Metre on 10-16-23
By: M.T. Anderson
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The Many Assassinations of Samir, the Seller of Dreams
- By: Daniel Nayeri
- Narrated by: Daniel Nayeri
- Length: 4 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 21
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 19
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Story4 out of 5 stars 19
This is the tale of an exciting journey along the Silk Road with a young Monk and his newfound guardian, Samir, a larger than life character and the so-called "Seller of Dreams". The man is a scammer; his biggest skill being the ability to talk his way into getting what he wants. While that talking did save Monkey's life, it has left a lot of people furious with Samir— furious enough to hire assassins. Monkey decides to try and save Samir from the attempts on his life—as a way to pay off his debt! If he can save Samir six times, he'll be a free man...but will they all survive that long?
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4 out of 5 stars
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Masterful Storytelling
- By B. McGuffey on 04-08-23
By: Daniel Nayeri
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Ander & Santi Were Here
- A Novel
- By: Jonny Garza Villa
- Narrated by: Avi Roque
- Length: 12 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 21
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 18
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Story5 out of 5 stars 18
The Santos Vista neighborhood of San Antonio, Texas, is all Ander Martínez has ever known. The smell of pan dulce. The mixture of Spanish and English filling the streets. And, especially their job at their family's taquería. It's the place that has inspired Ander as a muralist, and, as they get ready to leave for art school, it's all of these things that give them hesitancy. That give them the thought, are they ready to leave it all behind?
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5 out of 5 stars
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The author made me SEE!!!
- By Sunflower Hill on 12-30-23
What listeners say about The Girl I Am, Was, and Never Will Be
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Bridget
- 01-31-23
What a blessing this young woman is to both families!!
Gibney is a master storyteller! I would recommend to everyone!!it left me wondering if the wormhole was real…
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