Splitting

By: Bill Eddy, Randi Kreger

Narrated by: Jeffrey Kafer

Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins

Publisher's Summary

Divorce is difficult under the best of circumstances. When your spouse has borderline personality disorder (BPD), narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), or is manipulative, divorcing can be especially complicated. While people with these tendencies may initially appear convincing and even charming to lawyers and judges, you know better - many of these "persuasive blamers" leverage false accusations, attempt to manipulate others, launch verbal and physical attacks, and do everything they can to get their way. 

Splitting is your legal and psychological guide to safely navigating a high-conflict divorce from an unpredictable spouse. Written by Bill Eddy, a family lawyer, therapist, and divorce mediator, and Randi Kreger, coauthor of the BPD classic Stop Walking on Eggshells, this book includes all of the critical information you need to work through the process of divorce in an emotionally balanced, productive way. Turn to this guide to help you: 

• Predict what your spouse may do or say in court 
• Take control of your case with assertiveness and strategic thinking 
• Choose a lawyer who understands your case 
• Learn how emails and social networking can be used against you 

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio. 

©2011 William A. Eddy and Randi Kreger (P)2012 Tantor

Critic Reviews

"Splitting provides concise, clear, and invaluable advice for strategically navigating a divorce from someone who has narcissistic or borderline personality disorder. Following the suggestions laid out in this book will greatly increase the [listeners'] odds of having a successful marital dissolution under these difficult circumstances." (Susan Pease Gadoua, LCSW, author of Contemplating Divorce)

Effective narration, strong voice...

Really gets the point across...but after more than 20 years of abuse and still not finding a good pro bono attorney, the style of the narration left me feeling more intimidated, less protected, more vulnerable, more scared of my abuser and his attorney. I praise it for being very thorough, but it was very triggering for me to listen to. On top of that, it's left me feeling like I am totally under the gun to recreated everything on paper, repair lost and broken relationships, etc, overnight. These are things I have only a few weeks to do, to represent the over 20 years of horrible, soul-destroying abuse, and I'm not sure I can do it in this timeframe. DONT PASS UP THIS RESOURCE! LISTEN *NOW* AND BE PREPARED!!!! I just think it might benefit from being re-recorded, slightly softer... that's all. It really scared the hell out of my already scrambled, WAY over-andrenalinized, hypervigilant limbic system!!! AWESOME RESOURCE!!!!!

16 people found this helpful

Read this Now if You are Divorcing a Borderline

What did you love best about Splitting?

Very useful advice about the court system and custody matters, with advice from two experts who give specific to people who are in a court battle with someone who suffers from borderline and or narcissistic/antisocial traits.

Well written and well read. More than worth the price if you are involved in such a situation, think you might be in the future, or just want to know more about personality disorders.

What other book might you compare Splitting to and why?

Stop Walking on Eggshells by Randi Krieger. Written by one of the authors and a more comprehensive overview of BPD and NPD.

Have you listened to any of Jeffrey Kafer’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

no

Was this a book you wanted to listen to all in one sitting?

yes

7 people found this helpful

Excellent: Read the Whole Book

Are you being isolated and blamed for every negative situation in your family life? If yes, Splitting was written for you. Splitting is informative and proactive. The book brings to light problems that may occur and clear steps of action you need to know to protect yourself and/or your children from a BPD or ND spouse.
I highly recommend using it as a guide and first step toward preparation for separation and divorce. I plan to buy a hard copy to implement the written letters at the end of the book.

6 people found this helpful

necessary read!

necessary read for high conflict divorce. it explains the last 19 years of my life!

5 people found this helpful

A MUST HAVE if youre in a contentous divorce

Where does Splitting rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?

Well, I havent listened to many, and this is more of an instructional book than a story, though it uses many to illustrate its points. It is not exactly entertaining but ot is incredibly enlightening and should be used by attorneys, judges and families confronting divorce and child custody issues

What did you like best about this story?

That is offers usefil detailed approaches to prevailing in court when youre up against an individual who is willing to so anything to win.

Have you listened to any of Jeffrey Kafer’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

This is my forst. He speaks in a calm modulates voice that is easy to understand and follow, you can take notes .

If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?

This is not a screenplay.

Any additional comments?

Can you guys adapt the review process to include questions that are about nonfiction and informational texts like this one? These are important tools people can use in crisis and professionally. The ability to assess their usefulness is often derived by reviews written by readers like me. My first impulse was to not do it when I read the template . My bet is more people listen to non fiction than fiction; moreover, more non diction fams will read reviews than devotees to the James Patterson mill.

4 people found this helpful

Buy it

Highly recommended, very useful and on-the-mark book that saved me time, energy and legal fees

4 people found this helpful

Exactly what I am going through

My attorney sent me this audible as soon as I described my Ex to her. How he has manipulated his way through any professional that had power over our High Conflict Child Custody Battle. This book was truly what I needed. I will be listening to it again!

2 people found this helpful

excellent info

compared to other books on this topic, what i liked most was 'less example stories and more real info'. our family has needed this info in the last two years and i would say this book is the one i would recommend.

2 people found this helpful

Clear, concise and useful

If you find yourself in the regrettable position to be divorcing someone with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, or many of the most troublesome traits associated with these disorders, this book will help you prepare and cope.

5 people found this helpful

should be part of your div. prep.

very realistic, warns you about the pitfalls of divorce with a narc/BPD . I would definitely recommend reading this while married/before starting divorce to the Narc/BPD. It's useful realistic book, worth buying it . MUST READ if you have never witnessed divorce with a Narc

1 person found this helpful

A Must Read for Any Court with BPDs

Very detailed information amd helpful suggestions. Also some very insightful facts into what to expect when going to court with a Borderline whether divorce or other.

ESSENTIAL

this is essential information for anyone splitting up with a BPD / NPD. even if you're not, it will provide a deep understanding of the nature of the disorder.
however, it is completely US-centered and a lot of time is spent houng over American legal specifics.
nonetheless, if your not US-based it will present the right questioning of your own legal system, give you ideas and open up greater options.
you are not alone.