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Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl
- Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
- Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
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Publisher's summary
Are you the Fallback Girl? If you've ever found yourself in a relationship that feels and seemingly looks like one, but you're struggling with commitment, or you've been in the ambiguous territory of a "casual relationship", you've likely tried to change them, wondered what you did to cause this, what you can do to win their love and commitment, or even whether you're going crazy.
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is the definitive guide to understanding the relationship between emotionally unavailable men and the women who love them. From explaining how and why they blow hot and cold to where that future they promised went to, how you've ended up being a booty call, why you've been together for a gazillion years but aren't going anywhere, and more importantly how and why you're involved with them in the first place, all of the answers are here.
You know you're dealing with unavailability when you ask stuff like: What happened to that great guy from the beginning? Why won't he break up or stay away if he doesn't want to commit? What the hell did I do to make him disappear? Is he going to leave her for me? It's because he's shy/busy/scared of his feelings, isn't it? Inspired by the real-life adventures in unavailability of Natalie Lue and the readers of her site, BaggageReclaim.com.
Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is an empowering, entertaining, and inspiring read that will wise you up to pitfalls such as men who aren't over their exes, Future Fakers, guys who have more baggage than a Heathrow terminal, and reappearing childhood sweethearts. If you want to understand your own availability and why commitment in a healthy relationship is eluding you, Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is your guide to being available and attracted to healthy, available partners.
Back in the summer of 2005, Natalie Lue was a single advertising executive wondering out loud on her blog why she had a penchant for unavailable men. Using her site, BaggageReclaim.com, to answer that question while transforming her life, her blog has become a go-to source for understanding emotional unavailability, commitment, dating, relationships and self-esteem while inspiring many thousands of people to change their own relationship habits.
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President/CEO of Franklin Entertainment and former Sony Pictures executive DeVon Franklin and award-winning actress Meagan Good have learned sometimes all we can do is wait for "the one" to come into our lives. They spent years crossing paths, but it wasn't until they were thrown together while working on the film Jumping the Broom that their storybook romance began.
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The Wait Caused Me To Change
- By Bernard on 05-02-17
By: DeVon Franklin, and others
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Love Lost, Love Found
- A Woman's Guide to Letting Go of the Past and Finding New Love
- By: Tatiana Jerome
- Narrated by: Margaret Jewell West
- Length: 4 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Blindsided by a breakup, and asking herself the usual why, how, what questions, Tatiana Jerome went online. She used social media as a way to uplift and empower herself by venting but also working through her own part in the relationship's demise. Her posts struck a chord with thousands and then hundreds of thousands of readers - no surprise since most relationships (approximately 85 percent) end.
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Nice
- By Ms. Keisha on 11-13-17
By: Tatiana Jerome
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Living with the Passive-Aggressive Man
- Coping with Hidden Aggression - From the Bedroom to the Boardroom
- By: Scott Wetzler Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you know one of these men? The catch-me-if-you-can lover...Phil's romantic and passionate one minute, distant and cold the next. The deviously manipulative coworker or boss...Jack denies resenting Nora's rapid rise in the company, but when they're assigned to work together on a project, he undermines her. The obstructionist, procrastinating husband...Bob keeps telling his wife he'll finish the painting job he began years ago, but he never seems to get around to it. These are all classic examples of the passive aggressive man.
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A good review of the PA type man
- By Dew on 12-29-17
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Super You
- Release Your Inner Superhero
- By: Emily Gordon
- Narrated by: Emily Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Superheroes don't start from glorious beginnings. Their origins are almost always marked by traumatic events that leave them helpless and scared. Batman witnessed his parents' murder. Superman was sent away from his dying planet with no one to guide him as he grew up. Orphaned Catwoman was forced to steal food to survive on the streets of Gotham. What makes these superheroes super is their determination to not be defined by helplessness. They embrace their origins, their flaws, and their mistakes and strive every day to become the best versions of themselves.
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A wonderful book filled with empathy and humanity.
- By Vincent on 10-06-15
By: Emily Gordon
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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The Undervalued Self
- By: Elaine N. Aron
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Dawn Mitchell on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- By: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Abridged
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
- By Ali0531 on 07-06-15
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When Good People Have Affairs
- Inside the Hearts & Minds of People in Two Relationships
- By: Mira Kirshenbaum
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 6 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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A world-renowned therapist, Mira Kirshenbaum has treated thousands of people caught in the powerful drama over what to do when an affair rocks their emotional lives. Now, in When Good People Have Affairs, Kirshenbaum puts her unsurpassed experience into one clear, calming place. She leads listeners through six easy-to-navigate steps that will take anyone from anxiety to clarity, and identifies 17 types of affairs, helping listeners figure out which type they're in and what it means.
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This book condones affairs
- By Summer Phillips on 06-18-18
By: Mira Kirshenbaum
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How to Get Over a Boy
- By: Chidera Eggerue
- Narrated by: Chidera Eggerue
- Length: 3 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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In How to Get Over a Boy, Chidera Eggerue will show you, once and for all, how to reframe the stale goal of finding a man. She will equip you with tangible and applicable solutions for every part of your dating life, helping you recognise that men hold as much power in our romantic lives as we grant them. In the past, dating books tend to lean more into the territory of 'how to make him find you hot!', 'how to make him jealous!', 'how to get him to propose!'. But these how-tos are placing men on a pedestal of being 'the prize'. Men are never the prize. You are.
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Touching
- By erika soler on 04-21-20
By: Chidera Eggerue
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Codependent No More
- How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Melody Beattie
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Is someone else's problem your problem? If, like so many others, you've lost sight of your own life in the drama of tending to a loved one’s self-destructive behavior, you may be codependent—and you may find yourself in this book. With personal reflections, exercises, and instructive stories drawn from Beattie’s own life and the lives of those she’s counseled, Codependent No More helps you break old patterns and maintain healthy boundaries, and offers a clear and achievable path to healing, hope, freedom, and happiness.
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great book with unbearable reader
- By Nielah on 09-01-22
By: Melody Beattie
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It's Not My Fault
- The No-Excuse Plan to Put You in Charge of Your Life
- By: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Narrated by: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Length: 6 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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Using eight principles, a variety of true stories and their years of experience as professional psychologists, Cloud and Townsend enlighten readers on how to make empowering choices-and how to build the life they want to live. It may seem impossible but it's true: taking personal responsibility is not only liberating, it is the best-and perhaps the only-way for a person to get what they really want out of life.
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TOP BOOK of 2009
- By David on 03-14-11
By: Henry Cloud, and others
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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I can not recomment this book highly enough!
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My review
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Ignore the Guy, Get the Guy
- The Art of No Contact: A Woman's Survival Guide to Mastering a Breakup and Taking Back Her Power
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This audiobook is for all of you beautiful women who are overwhelmed by a breakup, divorce, or who are in relationship limbo. This is your survival guide, breakup bible, and how to guide that will get through the weeks or months following a breakup with your head held high, pride and dignity intact. Every woman can reverse a breakup. Women can learn how to obtain the relationships they want by earning the love and respect from any man they choose and have the time of their lives in the process.
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Misguided
- By Anonymous User on 05-08-21
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Avoidant
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People in relationships with avoidants struggle with their lack of responsiveness and inability to tolerate real intimacy. Relationships between an avoidant and a partner of another attachment type are the largest group of unhappy relationships, and people who love their partners and who may have started families and had children with an avoidant will work very hard to try to make their relationships work better, out of love for their partner and children as well as their own happiness.
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Derogatory towards woman/outdated/ female shaming
- By Stacy Lee on 05-12-18
By: Jeb Kinnison
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Win Your Breakup
- How to Be the One That Got Away
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You picked up this book because your breakup has been reduced to something that you feel you must “win” to emotionally survive and move on. This reduction can only take place if you were involved with a toxic person. Toxic people are selfish, empathetically bankrupt, and have a limited relationship with reality. Anyone who feels validated by exploiting your hunger for theirs is toxic - to your peace, your life, and your mental health.
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It’s like a bad gossip girl episode
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Just ok...
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The No Contact Rule
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You're trying to get over your ex, yet you're still in touch and have ended up being his or her backup plan. Maybe you haven't left yet, but you want to and just don't know how. Maybe you're tired of doing the lather, rinse, repeat of getting back together and winding up back at square one. It's time to cut contact. The No Contact Rule is an inspiring guide to extinguishing the temptation to stay in touch or to keep engaging, helping you to reclaim your sense of self and move on to a healthier relationship.
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I can not recomment this book highly enough!
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My review
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Ignore the Guy, Get the Guy
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This audiobook is for all of you beautiful women who are overwhelmed by a breakup, divorce, or who are in relationship limbo. This is your survival guide, breakup bible, and how to guide that will get through the weeks or months following a breakup with your head held high, pride and dignity intact. Every woman can reverse a breakup. Women can learn how to obtain the relationships they want by earning the love and respect from any man they choose and have the time of their lives in the process.
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Misguided
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By: Leslie Braswell
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Avoidant
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People in relationships with avoidants struggle with their lack of responsiveness and inability to tolerate real intimacy. Relationships between an avoidant and a partner of another attachment type are the largest group of unhappy relationships, and people who love their partners and who may have started families and had children with an avoidant will work very hard to try to make their relationships work better, out of love for their partner and children as well as their own happiness.
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Derogatory towards woman/outdated/ female shaming
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By: Jeb Kinnison
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It’s like a bad gossip girl episode
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Ghosted and Breadcrumbed
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Time and again, some women fall for someone who for one reason or another will never return their feelings. The object of their affection may be emotionally unavailable, married, or even pathologically cruel. The woman who routinely finds herself in this situation suffers mightily, feeling rejected, unloved, undesirable. With empathy and compassion, Dr. Marni Feuerman helps women see their situations clearly, understand the historical, emotional, and psychological reasons behind their actions, and most importantly, make better choices for themselves.
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For Woman who have affairs w/Married Men
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Never Get Ghosted Again
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No woman can change the reality that any man, no matter how interested or invested he may first appear, can potentially pull away and lose interest in her at some point. Although this is the reality, a woman can, in fact, change the way she deals with such situations. While you might not be able to control a man's behavior, you can control your own. Being in control of your emotions, especially when a man's behavior threatens your future with him, will make it easier for you to influence his heart and make him see you as an irreplaceable, high-value woman.
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A Woman’s Perspective
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This Is Me Letting You Go
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Letting go is not a process that comes naturally to us. In a world that teaches us to cling to what we love at all costs, there is an undeniable art to moving on - and it's one that we are constantly relearning. In this series of honest and poignant essays, Heidi Priebe explores the harsh reality of what it means to let go of the people and situations we love most - often before we are ready to - and how to embrace what comes next.
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Not for me
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Emotionally Unavailable Men
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Licensed therapist and certified relationship coach Dr. Lyn Kelley gives you the real lowdown on closed and withdrawn men. Rate your man on the "emotional unavailability scale". Find out why he shuts down emotionally, how to get him to open up, how to connect with him, how to create more intimacy, and how to make him fall deeply in love with you. Understand his psyche and how to know if you should stay or leave. Plus: The best 15 strategies to handle an emotionally unavailable man.
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This book = counseling from a 15 yr old girl
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The Joy of Saying No
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Are you still playing a role you learned in childhood to please others, such as the Good Girl/Boy, the Overachiever, or the Helper? Though these kinds of roles may have gained us attention and affection, they prohibited us from becoming our true selves. People-pleasing—putting others ahead of ourselves to avoid something negative or to get something we want or need—runs rampant in our society. Saying yes when we should say no leaves us stuck in frustrating patterns.
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Well-written, with actionable steps and integrity.
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By: Natalie Lue
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Make Him BEG for Your Attention
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Men give their undivided attention to those who respect them. If a man doesn't feel respected while communicating with you, he'll find the respect he needs elsewhere. The woman who knows how to communicate with men can influence the man she wants without resorting to "that mini-skirt he loves." A man craves the attention of a graceful woman who knows exactly what to say to him, when to say it, and, most importantly, how to say it to get what she wants.
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Often condescending but good points
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By: Bruce Bryans
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How to Be the Girl Who Gets the Guy
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Simple advice to help women who are stuck in relationship limbo or dealing with men who won’t commit. In this audiobook, you’ll listen to how confident, self-made, no BS kind of women handle the dating game and have the time of their life in the process. If insecurities and self-doubt bring out the worst in you, it is time retrain your way of thinking to attract love into your life. Whether going through a breakup, diving back into the dating pool, stuck in relationship limbo or trying to get your ex back after a break-up, this audiobook is for you.
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Waste of time
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Letting Go of Your Ex
- CBT Skills to Heal the Pain of a Breakup and Overcome Love Addiction
- By: Cortney Soderlind Warren PhD, Antonio Cepeda-Benito PhD - foreword
- Narrated by: Erin deWard
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Letting Go of Your Ex offers powerful, evidence-based skills grounded in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) to help you manage intense emotions, get unstuck from the past, and start focusing on what makes you happy now. Feeling addicted to your ex can leave you in a constant state of craving and withdrawal. But you can emerge as a stronger, more honest, and authentic version of yourself. This compassionate and practical guide can help you heal your pain, and start enjoying your life again—with or without your ex.
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Practical application and tools that benefit everyone!
- By Tegan aymond on 01-30-24
By: Cortney Soderlind Warren PhD, and others
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Red Flags
- How to Know He's Playing Games with You
- By: Brian Keephimattracted, Brian Nox
- Narrated by: Jerod McBrayer
- Length: 1 hr and 38 mins
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Learn secrets about men and the dishonest games they play that most women will never know. Most women are very surprised when a man becomes distant, when they find out he wasn't as interested as he seemed, or worse, when everything he said turns out to be a blatant lie. It's time to use the secrets of the men who "play" games with women.
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Matter of fact
- By tussy 4 life on 04-03-17
By: Brian Keephimattracted, and others
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Are You Scaring Him Away?
- The Top 4 Reasons Why Men Lose Interest Quickly
- By: Brian Nox
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Most women are very surprised when a man becomes distant, when he's afraid to commit, or, worse, when he just stops calling and runs away. It’s time to use the secrets of the male mind, and learn about men and what scares them away.
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Just be your best partner!
- By Hazel on 01-04-19
By: Brian Nox
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If We're Together, Why Do I Feel So Alone?
- How to Build Intimacy with an Emotionally Unavailable Partner
- By: Holly Parker PhD
- Narrated by: Laurence Bouvard
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
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Overall
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Living with an emotionally absent partner can be overwhelming. Constantly overcoming the silent distance can leave you with the sense that the give and take in your relationship has disappeared. But even the most broken relationship can be reinvigorated. In helping real-world couples achieve fulfilling futures, Harvard University clinical psychologist Dr. Holly Parker has developed a program filled with practical exercises and powerful advice for individuals on both sides of an emotionally damaged relationship.
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don't wasn't your time or money on this.
- By daniel smith on 12-11-22
By: Holly Parker PhD
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Loving an Avoidant Partner
- Understand Dismissive Attachment Style to Bridge Emotional Distance and Create a Secure Relationship
- By: Krista Cantell
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Introducing "Loving an Avoidant Partner," a groundbreaking guide that takes you deep into the enigmatic maze of an avoidant person's inner world like never before. Armed with remarkable insights, you'll decode the guarded secrets and fears of your elusive partner, shattering the barriers that have kept you apart.
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This Book feels like it was written by AI
- By Pen Name on 03-16-24
By: Krista Cantell
What listeners say about Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Rina
- 08-15-15
An unavailable, fall back's girl momentary realizations verbalized
This book was, for me, the streaming verbalization of the momentary realizations that passed through my mind many times through my focus on self discovery. No, she's not a scientist, nor does she claim to be. This isn't some scientific study on why some people end up in crappy relationships. This is a streaming reminder that your life is your main focus, that you can actually be the problem, but that it's part of learning how to bring happiness to yourself. I'm fortunate to live a life that is dictated by my own wishes and wants, and listening to this book solidified how fortunate I am to have the opportunity to look for, and want, and only accept quality. There are many wolves in sheep clothing, but being the one to try to shave it off is a waste of time. Take the book for what it is - a reminder to you in a time when you may be struggling like I am to assert your self esteem and be ok with having that power. I'm a fixer. If you're a fixer, just try it, you can always return it, but personally, I already know I will be listening to this the second I fall back into my cycle of self sabotage.
Thank you Natalie for just being honest and realistic, and not a male basher.
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20 people found this helpful
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- Jam
- 08-06-16
Fallback Girl in recovery
I will listen to this book on repeat until I get Mr Unavailable out of my head and until I fix what's broken in myself.
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18 people found this helpful
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- Tobhiyah
- 08-10-15
100% Yes.
If you're even looking at this review, answer is yes, definitely buy the book. It is fantastic! More amazingness than I can even begin to tell you.
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10 people found this helpful
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- Angel
- 10-13-15
A brilliant book
I have always attracted unavailable men. I know I'm also emotionally unavailable, mainly from all the pain I have experienced from these kind of men.
This book is so motivational, I'm going to listen to it again. Anytime I fall off the wagon or feel weak, I will listen to this book. What an eye-opener.
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9 people found this helpful
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- katie weber
- 01-21-18
Brutal
Wow ..... Lucy has zero tolerance with the human condition! But I loved it! You can't help but find your behavior and the behaviors of the men you surround yourself with. This book pulled my head out of my ass. I will listen to this numerous times.
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6 people found this helpful
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- B. BROUSSARD
- 08-06-17
I think I need the follow up book
I came to this book with pretty good knowledge that I was a fall back girl and it was my own responsibility and in order to move to healthy relationships I needed more information. This book definitely helped me erase any of my inner flip-flopping or desire to distract myself from the reality of things by trying to fix others or buffer or be buffered. I need to go back through it one more time and peel out the reconstruction of life parts. The descriptions over-layered for me and my experiences and that was reassuring creating a readiness to deepen my self esteem and use my fix-it energies in healthy ways that don't include relationship. I'm sure a healthy relationship is work of it's own but I can imagine with two people having the same goal and skills it's got to be easier and less drama and chaos filled than what I've done so far.
The performance was good I just took a while to acclimate to the accent and I wish I'd known the cultural references weren't American. It's all good, it just takes an inner moment of conversion and with so much covered that effects me deeply I feel I'll need to go through it again and take notes.
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6 people found this helpful
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- stephanie
- 04-03-19
Better to buy physical copy
I think this would have been a better book to buy a physical copy. It felt like there were so many lists and bullet points but the information was all so similar it was hard to disseminate her points.
Also felt like the last chapter (about 1/10th of the book) contained the most important information and the rest just drone on and on.
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5 people found this helpful
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- Lauren Schulman
- 07-11-16
Finding answers...
This book was so insightful. I have listened to it slowly over the course of my breakup and makeup and breakup again with the same person. I have finally found that not loving myself and respecting myself enough was allowing the wrong person to continually put their hooks back in me. I got answers to questions I didn't even know I had. Everything the author wrote, I could relate to so well. It made me feel like I wasn't the only one who has ever been in this kind of unavailable relationship. Nights when I felt so sad and alone, I would listen to the book and my tears dried, and I felt like everything would be ok. It helped me understand why things went wrong and my part in them as well. Great insightful book! Thank you for your words of healing.
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- Crystal r
- 09-12-18
nothing like I thought it would be.
more of a personal experience and not how to avoid the relationships like this. not what I expected.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 04-04-18
a helpful final chapter
The bulk of the book is repetitive and the helpful last chapter is full of brief listing of helpful ideas. The final chapter should have been more extensive and detailed making up the bulk of the book instead. The narration is of good quality.
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3 people found this helpful