• Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

  • By: Natalie Lue
  • Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
  • Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.8 out of 5 stars (619 ratings)

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Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl  By  cover art

Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

By: Natalie Lue
Narrated by: Lucy Price-Lewis
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Publisher's summary

Are you the Fallback Girl? If you've ever found yourself in a relationship that feels and seemingly looks like one, but you're struggling with commitment, or you've been in the ambiguous territory of a "casual relationship", you've likely tried to change them, wondered what you did to cause this, what you can do to win their love and commitment, or even whether you're going crazy.

Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is the definitive guide to understanding the relationship between emotionally unavailable men and the women who love them. From explaining how and why they blow hot and cold to where that future they promised went to, how you've ended up being a booty call, why you've been together for a gazillion years but aren't going anywhere, and more importantly how and why you're involved with them in the first place, all of the answers are here.

You know you're dealing with unavailability when you ask stuff like: What happened to that great guy from the beginning? Why won't he break up or stay away if he doesn't want to commit? What the hell did I do to make him disappear? Is he going to leave her for me? It's because he's shy/busy/scared of his feelings, isn't it? Inspired by the real-life adventures in unavailability of Natalie Lue and the readers of her site, BaggageReclaim.com.

Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is an empowering, entertaining, and inspiring read that will wise you up to pitfalls such as men who aren't over their exes, Future Fakers, guys who have more baggage than a Heathrow terminal, and reappearing childhood sweethearts. If you want to understand your own availability and why commitment in a healthy relationship is eluding you, Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl is your guide to being available and attracted to healthy, available partners.

Back in the summer of 2005, Natalie Lue was a single advertising executive wondering out loud on her blog why she had a penchant for unavailable men. Using her site, BaggageReclaim.com, to answer that question while transforming her life, her blog has become a go-to source for understanding emotional unavailability, commitment, dating, relationships and self-esteem while inspiring many thousands of people to change their own relationship habits.

©2011 Natalie Lue (P)2015 Audible, Ltd

What listeners say about Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

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  • Overall
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    5 out of 5 stars

An unavailable, fall back's girl momentary realizations verbalized

This book was, for me, the streaming verbalization of the momentary realizations that passed through my mind many times through my focus on self discovery. No, she's not a scientist, nor does she claim to be. This isn't some scientific study on why some people end up in crappy relationships. This is a streaming reminder that your life is your main focus, that you can actually be the problem, but that it's part of learning how to bring happiness to yourself. I'm fortunate to live a life that is dictated by my own wishes and wants, and listening to this book solidified how fortunate I am to have the opportunity to look for, and want, and only accept quality. There are many wolves in sheep clothing, but being the one to try to shave it off is a waste of time. Take the book for what it is - a reminder to you in a time when you may be struggling like I am to assert your self esteem and be ok with having that power. I'm a fixer. If you're a fixer, just try it, you can always return it, but personally, I already know I will be listening to this the second I fall back into my cycle of self sabotage.

Thank you Natalie for just being honest and realistic, and not a male basher.

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20 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Fallback Girl in recovery

I will listen to this book on repeat until I get Mr Unavailable out of my head and until I fix what's broken in myself.

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18 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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100% Yes.

If you're even looking at this review, answer is yes, definitely buy the book. It is fantastic! More amazingness than I can even begin to tell you.

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10 people found this helpful

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A brilliant book

I have always attracted unavailable men. I know I'm also emotionally unavailable, mainly from all the pain I have experienced from these kind of men.
This book is so motivational, I'm going to listen to it again. Anytime I fall off the wagon or feel weak, I will listen to this book. What an eye-opener.

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9 people found this helpful

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Brutal

Wow ..... Lucy has zero tolerance with the human condition! But I loved it! You can't help but find your behavior and the behaviors of the men you surround yourself with. This book pulled my head out of my ass. I will listen to this numerous times.

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6 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars
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I think I need the follow up book

I came to this book with pretty good knowledge that I was a fall back girl and it was my own responsibility and in order to move to healthy relationships I needed more information. This book definitely helped me erase any of my inner flip-flopping or desire to distract myself from the reality of things by trying to fix others or buffer or be buffered. I need to go back through it one more time and peel out the reconstruction of life parts. The descriptions over-layered for me and my experiences and that was reassuring creating a readiness to deepen my self esteem and use my fix-it energies in healthy ways that don't include relationship. I'm sure a healthy relationship is work of it's own but I can imagine with two people having the same goal and skills it's got to be easier and less drama and chaos filled than what I've done so far.
The performance was good I just took a while to acclimate to the accent and I wish I'd known the cultural references weren't American. It's all good, it just takes an inner moment of conversion and with so much covered that effects me deeply I feel I'll need to go through it again and take notes.

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6 people found this helpful

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    2 out of 5 stars
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Better to buy physical copy

I think this would have been a better book to buy a physical copy. It felt like there were so many lists and bullet points but the information was all so similar it was hard to disseminate her points.

Also felt like the last chapter (about 1/10th of the book) contained the most important information and the rest just drone on and on.

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5 people found this helpful

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Finding answers...

This book was so insightful. I have listened to it slowly over the course of my breakup and makeup and breakup again with the same person. I have finally found that not loving myself and respecting myself enough was allowing the wrong person to continually put their hooks back in me. I got answers to questions I didn't even know I had. Everything the author wrote, I could relate to so well. It made me feel like I wasn't the only one who has ever been in this kind of unavailable relationship. Nights when I felt so sad and alone, I would listen to the book and my tears dried, and I felt like everything would be ok. It helped me understand why things went wrong and my part in them as well. Great insightful book! Thank you for your words of healing.

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nothing like I thought it would be.

more of a personal experience and not how to avoid the relationships like this. not what I expected.

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4 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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a helpful final chapter

The bulk of the book is repetitive and the helpful last chapter is full of brief listing of helpful ideas. The final chapter should have been more extensive and detailed making up the bulk of the book instead. The narration is of good quality.

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3 people found this helpful