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Publisher's Summary

You’ve got a business colleague who’s hostile...a client who’s furious...a staffer who’s deeply cynical—how do you get people to do what you want in tough situations like these? In Just Listen, veteran psychiatrist and business coach Mark Goulston reveals the secret to how to get through to anyone, even when productive communication seems impossible.“Here's the challenge,” Mark says. “People have their own needs, desires, and agendas. They have secrets they’re hiding from you. And they’re stressed, busy, and often feeling like they’re in over their heads. To cope, they throw up barricades that make it difficult to reach them even when your goals are in sync with their own.”But the good news is that there are simple strategies that can make you compelling, and break down the walls that keep you from getting through to the people you need to buy into your ideas and goals. Just Listen presents remarkably effective tools and techniques you can use whenever a job, a sale, or a relationship hangs in the balance.How effective are Mark’s techniques? One of his areas of expertise is training FBI and police hostage negotiators to handle life-or-death situations. “The same tips I teach these professionals for building empathy, de-escalating conflict, and gaining buy-in will work in any situation,” Mark says. “Whether you’re a new employee fresh out of school, a salesperson, or a CEO, once you master these skills you can take them wherever you go in your career.” And Mark has proven these strategies in his own 30-year career as a business coach at companies such as GE, IBM, Goldman Sachs, Kodak, Federal Express, Hyatt, and Disney.

With this powerful yet engaging audio book, you’ll learn how to:

  • Get the attention of a total stranger who you need to know—like that potential client you absolutely must land.
  • Talk an angry person up from an instinctual (irrational) state to receptivity, and finally to rationality—a skill that can save a job, a marriage, or even a life.
  • Use the “Magic Paradox”—a technique the author developed for hostage negotiators— to turn a negative person into an asset.
  • Master the critical art of buy-in (the foreplay of negotiation, persuasion, and selling) by moving anyone through the “Persuasion Cycle.

”Barricades between people become barriers to success, progress, and happiness; so getting through is not just a fine art, but a crucial skill. Just Listen gives you the techniques and confidence to approach the unreachable people in your life, and turn frustrating situations into productive outcomes and rewarding relationships.

©2009 Mark Goulston (P)2011 Gildan Media Corp

Critic Reviews

“Goulston’s book delivers on his promise. Read it and you will discover the secret to getting through to absolutely anyone, and I mean anyone!” (Mark Victor Hansen, co-author of Chicken Soup for the Soul)

What members say

Average Customer Ratings

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Not worth the price! Advertisement 4 the author

What would have made Just Listen better?

If the author wasn't so stuck on himself and if he could be consistent in how he categorizes people. He can't write his way out of a wet paper sack, it doesn't matter that he has a medical degree and fancies himself to be a 'shrink'. He is NOT a good mentor. Waste of time.

Would you ever listen to anything by Mark Goulston again?

No.

How did the narrator detract from the book?

The narrator was ... hmmm, he was an actor without a job. He was reading the book as though he were reading to a six year old at bedtime. Too slow, too 'emotive', but since he was reading tripe who can blame him, really? The narrator was a clear speaker, with an interesting voice, he just did not have anything worth reading. I would listen to another book he narrated, yes, but not by this author.

If you could play editor, what scene or scenes would you have cut from Just Listen?

Just about everything. The author clearly was only advertising HIMSELF. He did not have a content editor, that was obvious to this longtime content editor. If you want to learn how to communicate with people that might be perceived as 'difficult' then buy Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People". Although published in the 1930s the overall message of Mr. Carnegie's is truly 'timeless'. His message doesn't focus on Mr. Carnegie but on his AUDIENCE. I have listened to that book several times and it has greatly helped me improve my communication style and mentoring abilities. By the way, there are no 'difficult people', there are only lost and lonely souls trying to communicate with a world that is getting crazier and crazier. I didn't hear any acknowledgement of that from the author, who, as a shrink, SHOULD know that. Dale Carnegie is timeless. HE knew about people.

Any additional comments?

I don't think Audible should buy books for sound recording without actually READING them first, and clearly, no one read this book. People are far too busy to waste time listening to someone 'I I I' himself. Hey, we can all do that in front of our own mirrors, we don't need to pay to listen to someone else laud himself. (I don't care if you post this review or not, but I've been a professional 'behind the scenes' content editor and ghost writer since the age of 17 and that's 48 years now. This book was not worth the few bucks it cost. "Psychiatrist" indeed! Now I know why I never bothered with those people. P.S. I'm returning this book. P.P.S. The only reason I continued to listen to this book was that I listened to it on my walk today and today I did a 10-mile walk AND I have a new cellphone and only this one book downloaded onto it. Oh well.

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instantly up level my ability

What made the experience of listening to Just Listen the most enjoyable?

I listen to it while working in the office. And i feel guided in a positive and more opening direction to deal with the in coming problems at work. I find myself being able to see more details touch more with people and having more patient and understanding. saying better thing connecting more with people. it's almost hypnotic. i love this book so much.

What did you learn from Just Listen that you would use in your daily life?

I think the most difficult but the most powerful one is to really hear where the conversation coming from from each ppl you encounter. The funny thing i noticed is my dialogue changed totally and ppl response new answers if not better than before! Suddenly i response with people in a whole new set of point of view that i don't normal come from. And it's new and it's fascinating. It's a whole new experience in the same old everyday life.

Any additional comments?

i really feel the power of communication now. i never really pay attention on it before. And i was never aware of how powerful it can be. It's almost like knowing how to feed other people's soul by being able to hear them and share where they are. It's a magical thing when communication really reached. to me it's a must have skill. This book is wonderful.

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Interesting, usefull but manipulating the listener

What did you love best about Just Listen?

The author is a real expert and professional, some ideas are very interesting.

Any additional comments?

The author is selling too much himself and his book, he try to manipulate the listener to have a good review on Amazon, I am sure he didn't decide to do so, some other "marketing guru" may have convinced him to do so.I am sure he could have done a better book if not pressed by the need of selling at any cost.

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Good book... I was expecting something different

First of all let me say I really liked the book.
The reason I don't give it a perfect score it's becasuse I was expecting the book to relate to more personal relations (spouse, kids, parents, friends, etc) Instead of professional relations (clients, managers, emploees, etc.)
I don't think the author had anything wrong, it was my expectation that was wrong...

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  • Matthew
  • Omaha, NE, United States
  • 10-30-13

Just Great

If you could sum up Just Listen in three words, what would they be?

If you struggle with influencing others this is the book for you.

Who was your favorite character and why?

This book is tactical. Mark gives you real stories about useful techniques and not fuzzy theories.

What about Walter Dixon’s performance did you like?

Walter is a good reader. He doesn't have distracting ticks and is pleasant to listen to. I will look for him in the future.

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Great Power = Great Responsibility (SPOILER ALERT)

I was in search of a book - which would provide me with a set of communication tools - with the purpose of forming closer bonds and connections with others. A variety of them are presented within in the book and special mention is made of practising them often iot become proficient. There was one angle which I was most uncomfortable with and disappointed in however. The angle is a direct consequence of the Age of Personality, which is “what can I get out of others?” The very same tools were shown to be just as effective in manipulating others iot get what you want! IE: Con the Personal Assistant into thinking that you have her best interest at heart while you only want access to the CEO. This is poor form but a characteristic of the times that we live in.

There are great tools but I plead with the listener to use these tools wisely. Use them to form a closer bond with those around you BUT with sincerity and integrity.

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  • Kathryn
  • Holt, MI, United States
  • 08-19-13

Be Interested, Not Interesting

This is one of my favorite self-development books! This author gave you practical methods to effectively communicate with others.

I enjoyed the part about being "interested" and not "interesting", showing interest in other people and making them feel "felt".

I was worried that this book may be too technical & boring since it was written by a psychiatrist. I was pleasantly surprised that it was very interesting. The author expressed excellent strategies to use along with good examples of conversations. These will be very useful in everyday situations. I am currently listening to the book a second time (hoping that I can remember everything).

If you would like to learn how to effectively communicate with people, you should definitely get this book!

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Became one of my top 5 all time favorite books

What did you love best about Just Listen?

The book is a very useful need for all of us who are not very diplomatic and people focused but rather direct and task oriented. A great enabler of strengthening emotional intelligence.

What did you like best about this story?

The author has not only great ideas but also amazing writing skills - the story is very engaging.

What does Walter Dixon bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?

.

Was there a moment in the book that particularly moved you?

.

Any additional comments?

.

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  • Joanne
  • Sherwood, Australia
  • 04-16-13

It was so good I listened to it again!

Would you listen to Just Listen again? Why?

I already have. I loved how this audiobook intertwined stories with the theory of Just Listening! <br/><br/>Given I listen to the book in the car I found I was compelled to immediately hit play agin upon completing the book as I wanted to refresh the new skills I needed to implement.

What was one of the most memorable moments of Just Listen?

I loved the story of the Pie shop and how it related to the content. Brilliant!

Which scene was your favorite?

The Aha moment of the pie store owner in realising the opportunity she had before her and that she could create a store based on the morals of her Aunt.

What insight do you think you’ll apply from Just Listen?

To give my prospects an opportunity to look up and consider the possibilities. <br/><br/>I tried this strategy by asking a prospect if they had a magic wand and could have whatever training programs they could what would they look like. His eyes went to the sky and he starting reeling off all these programs.<br/><br/>It was enlightening and enabled me to create an opportunity to work with this prospect. Fantastic!<br/><br/>The suggestion that I should endeavour to be Interested and not Interesting has been a life changer for me.. I simply recall the word Interested and there you go ... I slip into that mindset.

Any additional comments?

I was aware my challenge was to sit back and listen and on occasion still chastise myself for not listening however I am now so much more aware of my propensity for this that I do it less and less. <br/><br/>It is something I need to work on constantly however now see the value of zipping it and Just Listening! <br/><br/>The Narrator was fantastic .. what a great voice to listen to. Easy and engaging!<br/><br/>Thank you Dr Mark for a fantastic book, I have now ordered more of your books!

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Game Changer

Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?

This book was a great read for me after reading Dale Carnegie's "How to win friends and Influence People" It really has helped me in dealing with some of the more difficult people in my life. It truly changed my life. It was a great piece in the crash course in pschyolgy that I am giving myself on my car ride to and from work. Highly recommended! One of those reads you will find yourself preaching to friends but as you preach and they don't listen youll know why after this read!