• Insecure in Love

  • How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It
  • By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD
  • Narrated by: Susan Boyce
  • Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (807 ratings)

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Insecure in Love  By  cover art

Insecure in Love

By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD
Narrated by: Susan Boyce
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Publisher's summary

Has your romantic partner called you clingy, insecure, desperate, or jealous? No one wants to admit that they possess these qualities, but if you find yourself constantly on the alert, anxious, or worried when it comes to your significant other, you may suffer from anxious attachment, a fear of abandonment that is often rooted in early childhood experiences.

In Insecure in Love, you'll learn how to overcome attachment anxiety using compassionate self-awareness, a technique that can help you recognize your negative thoughts or unhealthy behavior patterns and respond to them in a nurturing way - rather than beating yourself up. You'll also learn how insecurity can negatively affect healthy dialogue between you and your partner (or potential partners) and develop the skills needed to stop you from reverting back to old patterns of neediness and possessiveness.

©2014 Leslie Becker-Phelps (P)2015 Tantor

Critic reviews

"A godsend for those who unknowingly bring a lot of angst into a relationship." ( Library Journal)

What listeners say about Insecure in Love

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    4 out of 5 stars

attachment theory

good book i learned a lot, it has a lot of ideas mirroring "attached" which i recommend reading first

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21 people found this helpful

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    5 out of 5 stars

Narrator, Please Take a Drink—I Beg You

As far as the book goes, it’s amazing, and I highly recommend it to anyone—especially those suffering from an anxious attachment style. However, as far as the actual audiobook goes, I couldn’t wait for it to be over. It was so painful to listen to the narrator’s dry mouth. I cringed every time she swallowed or opened her mouth to read. It was extremely distracting. I had to force myself to listen to the whole thing.

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19 people found this helpful

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Excellent book

This book really helped me understand why I reacted certain ways in past relationships AND it has great exercises to help move toward a more secure way of thinking. If you've ever asked yourself, "Why did I do that?", or if you've ever felt you didn't deserve to be loved this is a must read.

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16 people found this helpful

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Need a companion workbook or the written text.

Lots of excellent suggested self work but hard to stop what your doing when listening to audio Will be purchasing the written book and / or workbook if available

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16 people found this helpful

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I don’t normally leave reviews

This book was absolutely incredible, so many powerful insights to help mainly people struggling with insecurity in love relationships. I can’t recommend it enough

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10 people found this helpful

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Great book!

Very therapeutic researched advice that helped me a lot in dealing with an avoidant female. Couldn't recommend this book enough for anyone.

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9 people found this helpful

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Excellent read

I really enjoyed the book and was surprised at how much it knew about my anxiously attached behaviors. If you want to read something that will give you tools to get out of the anxious cycle you are and and have a healthy lasting relationship, buy this book.

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6 people found this helpful

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great read

Definitely helpful for learning how to manage my own emotions and feelings. definitely recommend to others who want to have more self control and want to feel like they are empowered.

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6 people found this helpful

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A must read for understanding attachment styles

This book discusses both anxious and avoidant style, and of course secure. The exercises allows you to dig in to any wound you may be struggling with and see it from a different perspective. You may cry while listening, or after doing an exercise, but more importantly you will feel yourself giving yourself a huge hug. This book is quite lovely! Very understanding on how it discusses attachment styles in a none judgmental way.
Worth the investment!

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5 people found this helpful

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This offers hope

If you have difficulty with relationships or pervasive patterns of problems in relationships, listen to the book. Twice preferably.

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5 people found this helpful