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Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me) Audiobook

Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions and Hurtful Acts

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Publisher's Summary

Why do people dodge responsibility when things fall apart? Why the parade of public figures unable to own up when they screw up? Why the endless marital quarrels over who is right? Why can we see hypocrisy in others but not in ourselves? Are we all liars? Or do we really believe the stories we tell? Backed by years of research and delivered in lively, energetic prose, Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me) offers a fascinating explanation of self-deception - how it works, the harm it can cause, and how we can overcome it.

©2008 Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson (P)2010 Audible, Inc.

What the Critics Say

"Thanks, in part, to the scientific evidence it provides and the charm of its down-to-earth, commonsensical tone, Mistakes Were Made is convincing. Reading it, we recognize the behavior of our leaders, our loved ones, and—if we're honest—ourselves, and some of the more perplexing mysteries of human nature begin to seem a little clearer." (Francine Prose, O, The Oprah Magazine)

"By turns entertaining, illuminating and—when you recognize yourself in the stories it tells—mortifying." (The Wall Street Journal)

What Members Say

Average Customer Rating

4.2 (1375 )
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Performance
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  •  
    Rosanne Font 01-09-15 Member Since 2013
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    "Somewhat intriguing"

    This book was written in a research style that dragged with redundancy at times. I liked most of the examples of denial & dissonance given, but some were lengthy & tedious. A closing summary of how to avoid becoming a major mistake maker in denial would have been helpful.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Robyn 09-26-14
    Robyn 09-26-14

    Avid reader of history, biography, and true crime.

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    "Basic Psychology (and how it applies to you)"

    This book explains cognitive dissonance and the related concept of self-justification. The research underpinning these theories is presented, with case examples which range from big political decisions which start wars to interpersonal conflicts which all of us deal with in our everyday lives. The easy and seductive part of the book is fitting the theories to the behaviour of people we know - it explains a lot. The tricky part is to keep reminding yourself that it is equally applicable to your own behaviour and may also explain a lot about you. With any luck it will help people to recognise their own mistakes and avoid making similar mistakes in future. Even if it doesn't change your life or improve your relationships, it's an interesting read and an easy way to learn some basic Psychology. Marsha Mercant has a very pleasant voice and does a very good job as narrator.

    1 of 1 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Kathy Davis, CA, United States 09-13-15
    Kathy Davis, CA, United States 09-13-15 Member Since 2008

    Besides incessant listening to audiobooks, I also read on my Kindle at night, birdwatch, garden (roses, daylilies), and do genealogy.

    HELPFUL VOTES
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    "Truly Scary--A Must Listen!"

    "Mistakes, who me? Not very often! I'm pretty perfect most of the time."

    This book was a bit scary to me because it shook the foundations of many of my beliefs.

    This book debunks many of all our common beliefs. For me, that my memories are reliable it is I who remember what really happened, unlike my brother and my hubby, who were there but must have memory problems. Not so, apparently. It seems my memories are as faulty and unreliable as anyone else's.

    For me, that my sister-in-law adds to and embellishes her family history, more and more every year, but I certainly don't do that! Apparently, not so. I am not immune to this either.

    In general, honest people do not confess to crimes they did not commit. Most certainly not. Well, maybe with the exception of the Central Park Jogger story, where all the young men arrested and convicted made false confessions and were innocent. That was an anomaly, right? Apparently, not so. This book in detail explains how and why people will confess when they haven't done the crime. This section is truly scary and I have given up my support of the death penalty, telling my hubby he was right all along. I admitted my mistake to him, a rare thing for one who seldom made mistakes (before this listen.)

    Mistakes. Yes, that is another area covered. The book explains how and why we justify our mistakes, in the rare cases we make them (or are they so rare?) It is so understandable it is truly unnerving.

    Also discussed in depth is a the area of spats, grudges, feuds, divorces, wars and why things get so terribly ugly. This section made me feel truly helpless and sad.

    Everyone can benefit from this book. It really is a must listen that I stumbled across as a daily deal. I wouldn't have searched it out. My mistake.

    It is life changing for me.

    5 of 8 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Venkata pramod paruchuri Texas, USA 05-07-13
    Venkata pramod paruchuri Texas, USA 05-07-13 Member Since 2017
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    "Repititive and Preachy"
    What would have made Mistakes Were Made (But Not By Me) better?

    Reduce number of examples probably.


    Would you ever listen to anything by Carol Tavris and Elliot Aronson again?

    Probably Not


    Would you be willing to try another one of Marsha Mercant and Joe Barrett ’s performances?

    Depends on the book not the idiots who read it.


    You didn’t love this book... but did it have any redeeming qualities?

    The book was very informative and helps explain this we do and see around us.


    Any additional comments?

    Enough with the Republicans/Conservatives are cheating, lying idiots and corporations are evil, corrupt and Selfish Meme. Can we please move on...

    6 of 10 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Tamma missouri 05-21-17
    Tamma missouri 05-21-17

    arty

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    "Powerful"

    Content of this book is outstanding and thought provoking. The delivery is well done. The authors use many different approaches and lots of life examples to help support their premise.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Just Me 05-05-17
    Just Me 05-05-17
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    "Basic review of the research"

    This offers a basic review of research that has been done on the topic. Nothing new or insightful. If you want a simple to understand look at the topic, kind of a Cognitive Dissonance 101 class, this will do the job; but it's not even a great overview. Adequate. Nothing more.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer LaGrangeville, ny United States 04-07-17
    Amazon Customer LaGrangeville, ny United States 04-07-17 Member Since 2005
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    "makes you stop and think"

    about your own actions and beliefs. lot of meaningful examples. actors are easy to listen to.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Amazon Customer 02-14-17 Member Since 2017
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    "Awesome Book!"

    It is an Amazing book, I would recommend it to everyone! one of my new favorites!

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
  •  
    Asher Maryland 01-06-17
    Asher Maryland 01-06-17 Member Since 2015
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    "Very enlightening"

    This is one of those books that made me regret not majoring in social psychology since it is so fascinating and useful in understanding our own nature via scientific studies and facts. Please get this book if you are looking to learn something while also being hooked to such an interesting subject.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful
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    Jon Stojan 12-22-16
    Jon Stojan 12-22-16 Member Since 2015
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    "Almost scary insightful"

    loved this book. Great analysis of how cognitive dissonance blinds us in important decision and what to do about.

    0 of 0 people found this review helpful

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